Any research any how many votes it influenced? Did Kerry clearly distance himself from that idea? IMO he should have said something like: Marriage is a union between a man and a woman. That cannot be changed. Gays should be allowed to register and legalize their relationships, but it can never be called marriage or be legally equalized with it. This should be added to the Constitution to make sure no state judges allow it. What would that cost him? The gay vote? Or does he really believe homosexual relationships are equal to heterosexual ones?
Well, there you go, being relatively level-headed and making a compromise that would work. What a lot of Dems failed to realize is that there is a huge number of people who react negatively to homosexuality and feel threatened by it. And they resent the hell of being labeled homophobes because they feel that scripture condemns it or that they simply view marriage as a bedrock social institution and define it conservatively. If we had created stronger civil rights protections for homosexual unions, we wouldn't have needed to suffer this anger and divide in our society. We cannot unring the bell, but if both sides would stop demonizing the other, we can reach a consensus that doesn't require people to condone homosexuality and yet offer the protections homosexuals ought to have.