That's right boys and girls, your curent version of DC United is on pace to be, statistically, the worst offense in the brief history of Major League Soccer. In 1999, Bora's pathetic MetroStars, considered the worst one-season team in league history, scored 32 goals in as many games for a goals-per-game average of 1.00. This year, United has scored 19 goals in as many games. At first glance, that would seem to equal the MetroStars lowly per-game average of 3 years ago, BUT, 99 was the last shootout year, meaning the Metros did not play any overtime games. By contrast, DC has played 5 over time games for 32 minutes of extra soccer. Therefore, divided 19.33, United's goals-per-game average is 0.98, making United the worst offensive team in league history. Obviously, the team still has a chance to pull themselves past the MetroStars average and as the playoffs are basically a lost cause, not ending the season as the worst offensive team in MLS history is my new goal for United. To meet this goal, United has to score 10 goals in it's last 9 games, which, given its recent output, seems a little unrealisitc but, hey, it's important to set the bar, ahem, high and to shoot for, uh, lofty goals. So there it is - 10 goals in the final 9 games to avoid ignominity that currently belongs to our most-hated rivals. And best of all, we have 3 games against the MetroDonkeys so we have a chance to avoid this record against the team that already holds the mark. C'mon Ray - You and the "lads" can do it!