Yo Ric..…why the long face? Okay, with that obligatory — and **always** funny — joke out of the way, I just thought it was time for a thread on these guys. I mean, who doesn’t love The Cars? Communists? Saddam? Richie Williams? Who? I remember being higher than a Steve Perry C-note in my friend’s puke green Ford Maverick with his new piece o crap tape deck listening to Panorama— probably their worst album— and singing along with the title track thinking: “What could possibly be better than this?” And I can’t really argue with my then-self. Because after Candy-O and their genius debut album, they could have released 40 minutes of Jack Edwards trying to shout the word “goal” convincingly and I would have loved it. Let’s focus on that first album for a minute: Just think of the layered vocals on “Gooooood Tiiiiiimes Rooooollll.” Shivers. The spaz-jerk of Ocasek’s vocals on “Best Friend’s Girl.” The new wave imperative of “Just What I Needed.” And those are just the first three tracks. And of course the record ends with the spacey dyad of “Moving in Stereo” blending into “All Mixed Up.” Because, after all: Life’s the same. We’re moving in stereo. Life’s the same. Except for my shoes. Except for my shoes? WTF? Okay, so lyrically, they were no geniuses. In fact, they have some of the worst lyrics ever— the above being a prime example. But what do expect from a group with one of the worst names ever? The Cars? It’s as perfectly stupid as it is stupidly perfect. Anything would have been a better name — the ‘Vettes, the Mustangs, the Camaros, hell the Pintos. But from a group wearing white framed vaurneys, string ties and valley girl shoulder pads, The Cars seems pretty apt. I mean, take a look at those guys — even at 15 I knew deep down that they were geeks. Yet, Candy-O... I need you.