Specialization

Thirteen is probably old enough if this is her wish. I know there is a lot of talk about early specialization being a bad thing. I think for the most part, they are referencing younger athletes, particularly when speaking of girls who mature earlier than boys. There is, however, one thing to be aware and that is the increased potential for injury that sports specialization can cause. You may want to get her involved with a sports trainer who is aware of the problem and can develop a program for her to help prevent injury. You should also be aware that taking time off from the sport for rest and recorvery is also an essential part of training in the sport. The trainer and her soccer coach should be able to develop a periodization schedule for her that can help in this respect.

 

Hi Menace. You may recall my 12 year-old daughter just went through this same thing between soccer and basketball. From a decision-making standpoint, I don't think there's a magical age except the "age of reason" which varies by individual.

I think the role of the high school in the respective sports is a major "time" factor that drove OUR decision. I say "our" because the decision had to be made now because in our area, high school sports are still considered important comparative to club sports. This drove the timing of making a decision sooner because she will enter high school in 9th grade, and she was just finishing 7th grade.

She did not make this decision alone. We helped her with the pros and cons. It was actually quite fun, and really neat to hear her perspective as to why this course of action was best for her. Not surprisingly, she initially stated she wanted to specialize in basketball, and despite my grilling, successfully defended her decision to me. She's 12, yet I know some of her 14 year-old friends would not have the ability to make a decision like this alone.

 

Everything entered above is right on, however there is another thing to remember and be fair with. Your talking about a soccer team here, and she is playing select. A side of soccer where players and families (at least 1/2 of them anyway) are very committed too. If your daughter misses a match to go do the high jump at a meet, then my friend, the soccer team suffers. And pressure on her and you will start to show. This is one of the problems we have in our State. You drive across the river to the east and its completely different. She will be a U14, playing in MWRL and for a State Cup team. Its time, to rethink everything. As much as my daughter loved BB, she gave it up, gave up starting point for one of the most highly regarded HS's in our state. And yes, the HS put pressure on us to rethink this. But she decided to reach her goals, she had to scarifice. What you need to ask 23 is this, what are her soccer goals, State ODP, Region II, Div-I, NAIA, Top 10 program, or does she want to play Socr just to play and zero in on Highjumping?? You heard what Coach had to say about her being tired, this isnt all from playing Socr. And its not going to be much easier. The hard part for you is this, you live in a Smaller town/HS and 1 hr away from her Soccer teammates, so it will become very hard to say no to do HS events.
Tough one!! Good Luck

 

I don't have years of experience - my daughter just turned 14. A year ago, her decision would have been soccer, soccer, and more soccer. This year she was captain of her middle school track team and plans to play volleyball in the fall, in addition to her club soccer. Who would've predicted this? I often wonder why we are so intent on specialization? To what end?

Why does a thirteen year old HAVE to make a decision? Isn't it okay to take each season on with a fresh look? Shouldn't the door always be open for a child to change her mind?

Great thread.

 

I bet 23 knows where the line needs to be drawn.

MF, after watching A LOT of matches at the RII Tournament this past week, you can tell the teams/clubs that are very committed to Socr. Now, Im NOT bashing 23 on doing multi sports, however, you take our state for example..They play and win State Cup in Fall, then they all go off and play HS in the Spring and they do NOT train and travel as a State Cup team in the spring. You go off to Regionals and they get beat up. People ask why? Which then you must ask yourself, and 23, if your team decides to play HS, in our State, then I think its OK for 23 to do the HighJump etc. This is really hard for me to say, but our State will never change. All the blue teams went down in flames, and the older the teams got, the worst it became. Unless you have a full squad of 18 bypassing HS to work on Regionals, the right way, then all your doing is showcasing your own player instead of the team and what could be. I dont know if you could tell the excitment in my voice when I called you from the tournament, but to experence that, you have to be willing to sacrifice. You and 23 have a great opportunity to go to the Natls here in town the end of July. I would HIGHLY recommend that you go to as MANY girl matches as you can. Try to watch the Eclipse U18's 2 time Natl Champs play. You will see a different type of soccer played from girls that you havent seen anywhere. Trust me. This team is my daughters teams goal to be like in a few yrs. Goals, Sacrifice, Committment, Team, etc.

New question, off the beaten path here...But MF also could mean
Maroon Fanatic??

 

Hey Menace, there is one other thing about this issue that hasn't been raised.

You have an athlete that is obviously very good in both soccer (team sport) and track (individual sport). While her love is soccer, I would bet her parents want her to continue to excel in an individual sport where she doesn't have to depend on anyone else to help her win.

I think what it comes down to is the golden rule: He who has the gold, makes the rules. In your case, the kid has the gold. She is obviously talented, and her coaches will allow her to continue to play any sports she wishes, as long as she is a "plus" to the team. Let's face it, if she were an average player, her coaches would force her to make a choice.

But, as we saw on the other specialization thread, the first coach to force the choice could end up being the one not liking the choice...

 

5X3...Im not knocking rec soccer, but the level MF daughter wants to get in soccer is a bit further than rec....And to get there, sacafices will have to be made, maybe even to the point of giving up track and field. But in our state, she could probably be able to do it all. Whos to say.
After watching numerous matches at the Region II tournament this past week, there IS a difference.

 

Hey MF,

Make sure your daughter wants soccer and only soccer before she gives up everything else. You don't want her answering the question "How was high school?" with "I don't know all I did was play soccer" unless that is what she truly wants.

Because she can still do other things and commit plenty of time to soccer. The all your eggs in one basket approach can be devasting if she doesn't realize what ever goal it is (in soccer) she's set and yet given everthing else up for it.

My kid was one that gave up another sport (basketball) and then went back to it a year later because it was fun to play (and she was begged ) and it gave her something different to do along with soccer. Now (because of basketball) she'll go play in college with fewer regrets about missing dances (including Prom) because of out of state tournaments and family vacations and activities with her friends because of soccer conflicts.

Few are the girls who can focus entirely on soccer and be happy. I think regionII has one and I know of a few others. But mostly they need some balance (with lots but not all the emphasis on soccer)

 

Words to ponder..

Days spent on the field, crazy parties I missed, weekend
hang outs blown, hours of hard work, tons of sweat,
never ending plane rides, late night bus
trips,thousands of dollars spent, sneakin out on
tournaments, screaming coaches, bad refs, not getting
the boy of your dreams because you didnt have enough
time to spend with him, at times, wanting to give it all up,
being on the road for your birthday, having everyone in
the crowd watch you as you own on a breakaway,
leaving the night of christmas for some tournament,
missing school vacations and summer break to try out
for teams, moving to a different state just because the
teams better, tears, blood shed, broken bones, your
teams bullshit, trying to explain your game to your
friends at school who have no idea what your talking
about, losing friends because you have practice the day of
their birthday, BIG DREAMS. Would I change any of it? NO WAY!
WHY? Because theres no better feeling in the
world than when the game is over and your family comes
to greet you because you played outta your mind and you
got the W, not your parents and brother, but your 17
sisters who are there through more then your other family is,
doing a sweet setp over, making a filthy save, or
winning the championship. All this after months of hard
work. That's my life.
-Soccer

 

Hi RII and MF. Sorry I'm a bit late getting back to this thread.

You're not offending me by bringing up rec, RII, but I don't know what it has to do with the topic. If you perceive I'm looking at this from a rec perspective, you need to remember I coached select soccer (and am happy to announce my kid's coming back to select play this Fall). Also, my kid just played summer club basketball for a team that would probably be ranked about 5th-8th in the state at their age level. I've got a pretty good feel for how select sports work.

Again, if the girls's good enough, yet track is a conflict, the soccer coach will bend rules to let her play. Our b-ball coach is a HARDA$$ when it comes to conflicts - you choose his team in a conflict or you ride pine. Of course, the coach's rules were bent a little for my daughter's 6'0" friend, a state-ranked tennis player who had tennis conflicts with about 1/3 of the b-ball tournaments this summer. When she could play, the coach kept his word and she rode the bench - for about the first five minutes of the games she made!

 

Fantastic thread and extremely relevant to questions that I think every talented player/athlete faces in high school and now even younger in middle school.

In my opinion play as many sports as you can for as long as you can. I think what many overzealous parents, coaches and sometimes kids forget in the quest to be the best, is that playing other sports helps you become a better player, physically, mentally and tactically. I can only speak from my own experience here, but throughout high school I competed for my high school at the state level in springboard diving, gymnastics, volleyball and cross country. I can definitely say that my experiences in other sports helped me become a better soccer player from a physical standpoint: springboard diving/gymnastics=body awareness and flexibility, cross country=stamina, volleyball=jumping ability. Tactically, playing the other sports helped my vision, especially volleyball, as well as footwork etc necessary to win head balls, and mentally, having the opportunity to play other sports gave me a break from soccer and had me always excited to play, as well as putting me in tough mental situations, high pressure, having to fight through being tired etc etc.

Of course there is definitely the "jack of all trades master of none" mantra that my Dad continued to harp on me as I got older--but it just became prioritizing--I guess I was lucky with sports such as gymnastics and cross country that having to miss practices because of soccer hurt only myself as they were individual pursuits. I knew in my heart soccer was my passion and I had goals I wanted to achieve, so gradually by my senior year of HS it was at a point where realistically I only had time for soccer and had quit playing all the other sports even at a recreational level because I just didn't have the time anymore. I was also really lucky to have understanding coaches who saw the bigger picture and when I was in 8th and 9th grades let me miss the odd practice for an important volleyball game etc. But all my other sports knew that soccer was my priority in HS and I guess saw me as an asset to the team to let me miss practices etc if there was a conflict. Balance was also key--I definitely missed a lot of "fun" high school events because of soccer, but also was having a blast with my teammates at tournaments etc so I never really felt like I was suffering from missing the whole "normal" high school experience (I love that poem that someone posted above by the way--all of it so true!). I also found creative ways to manage my time--I remember getting made fun of plenty showing up at the high school party at 9pm instead of 7pm so I could get in some training on my own, but also not miss out on the fun (and had parents who instead of realizing how important image is in HS, telling my friends that on the Friday night while they were all at the party that, yes I was out on my own at the park playing soccer and that was why I wasn't there yet, automatically making me get shredded the first 5 minutes of every Friday night party

That being said, I got to college where I played NCAA Div 1 and was still extremely passionate about playing and practicing to get better. I could never understand my teammates who weren't as stoked about doing extra in the off season or summer. I did find a common theme in that many of them were the kids who had only played soccer for so many years that a lot of them come being 19 or 20 were somewhat burned out and did the bare minimum to keep their scholarship but that was it. I have been in soccer environments where I have gotten burned out from having my entire life revolve around soccer, and appreciate that balance that I had growing up so much more because of it. Without it, I don't think I would be in my mid 20's and still playing almost every day feeling most days as passionate when I was 15.

That all being said, I recognize that there is a different climate out there these days with kids feeling pressure that they have to specialize younger and younger if they want to "make it". I do some coaching and interact a lot with high school female players, and I can't help but see so many of them who are the next big thing when they are 12, training every day, be completely burned out and hampered by injuries by the time they are 16. Also so many teams that are God's gift to soccer again at the younger ages having issues when they kids get to the older grades when it really matters because coaches and parents are so focused on winning those U14 games that by the time they get to U17 they haven't developed kids who are mentally and physically at their peak. It makes me sad to see.

That all being said, if your kid has the determination and drive to make it, that will shine through and they will find a way. But the biggest thing is keep in mind if the goal is to play in college and even just to have the girls playing as adults still loving the game--again going with the overused cliche ( in the "jack of all trades master of none" category , slow and steady wins the race. Make decisions that make you have a daughter physically and mentally loving soccer when they are 16, 17, 18, 19 and beyond when it really matters.....

Wow I have rambled here. Hope that helps......

 

Great response coming to us at the perfect time. My daughter is trying to decide whether to play high school volleyball or soccer and needs a decision soon. Thanks for taking the time to ramble!

 

It is nice to see the jump in posts. Many of us are still mystified by the whole soccer scene and it's nice when a voice of experience comes in.

 

Thanks for the nice words. Its my pleasure to be able to just share my own experiences and in doing so perhaps help someone else--I'd be more than happy to be a vocal resource as I have definitely been there. Soccer has treated me very well in my life. I just again would reiterate to try and play as many sports as they can and encourage the girls to be involved with as much as possible. If soccer is their passion, then for sure make it the priority (ie. missing practices for other sports if there is a conflict with soccer etc) but try and keep them involved in other activities. And don't get distracted from the goal of having a daughter who is in her late teenage years still loving soccer and motivated to become a better player. I see so many parents who see that their daughter Jenny's friend Susie is playing 7 days a week and if they want Jenny to not lose any ground, they too need to have her playing that much. Heart, desire and motivation play such a huge role in long term success, make sure you are cultivating that in your daughter by not having her burn out young.

One last thing that I think is so forgotten in this whole rush for organized "serious" coaching and teams. In my opinion, the real skill development comes from the kids who take the ball out on their own and juggle, or knock it against a wall or play pick up with kids in the neighborhood, or who get up Saturday mornings and watch the EPL or MLS games. Those are also the kids who are not as burned out because they are out on their own accord, not because they "have" to be at a practice etc. Its those moments I remember where I really grew my passion and love for the sport, far away from anything super organized. I think my parents were pretty stoked as well, as me practicing against the wall at the side of our house was a lot easier on the pocketbook, than all the fancy, expensive soccer schools that my friends were at

 

This is a great topic. I wish I had more time to throw out a few thoughts; however, in the meantime I will post an article or two that might be of interest. Keeping in mind how important it is to develop eye/foot coordination before puberty, the following is a good one as long as the child, girl or boy, is still kicking around the ball the rest of the year:

Which Sports MUST Children Play...
by Brian Grasso

One of the questions that I get asked most routinely is which sports I believe offer the best development capacity to young athletes.

This is a loaded question for several reasons…

First of all, ANY sporting activity lead by a quality-based coach is wonderful for kids.

That being said, the true crux and efficacy of that statement is based largely on the ‘quality-based coach’ comment.

Adult Influence

It is only when poorly educated and over zealous parents and coaches (i.e. adults) get involved too heavily in youth sports that the experience can become sour. Parents often push too hard and seek success at a young age; coaches often are limited in their understanding of developmental science and routinely ‘drill’ kids with ‘sport specific’ (I hate that phrase) exercises that are too narrow in scope (not to mention that many youth sport coaches don’t know how to TEACH specific aspects of movement or speed and yet get annoyed when their athletes don’t perform a given drill to a high enough standard).

Just Let The Kids Play...

One the most prominent and problematic realities of the above comments is that there don’t seem to be many (any?) outlets for kids just to play anymore. Every young sporting activity is a life or death struggle that MUST climax in a victory… heaven forbid we actually teach developmentally sound skills in a fun and energetic way in order to promote a wholeness to our youths development – which by the way should include emotional stability (for instance highlighting the skills gained in a given season rather than the ‘wins’ and trophies accrued) and mental stimulation (in the form of engaging life lessons that instill a lifelong love for physical activity rather than a win-at-all-costs mentality which can burden kids with various complexes for years).

Having said that, I encourage parents to remove the desire to watch their 8 year olds win the weekend tournament; I encourage coaches to remove there ‘Lombardi’ hats when they walk into a practice or game situation; I also encourage strength and conditioning coaches to remove there yearning to ‘test’ young athletes from a biomotor perspective and look only to increase a child’s ability from a performance outlook.

In fact…

My message is simple…

Play sports seasonally.

Find coaches and programs that highlight skill acquisition rather than victory.

Find trainers who do the same – work towards instilling skills into kids rather than creating performance markers.
What Should Kids Be Playing?

So, here than are my top four sports that all kids should play (in no particular order)–

1) Soccer

In most parts of North America, kids lack foot dexterity and soccer is a wonderful natural enhancer of both foot dexterity and foot-eye coordination. Don’t pigeon hole this ability as only necessary for soccer either. Remember, the crux of developing a ‘whole’ athlete is to engross them in as much athletic stimulus as possible at a young age. Increased foot dexterity will, in time, round out a youngsters overall ability and allow them to progress in there ‘chosen’ sport more proficiently.

Additionally, although many North Americans find soccer to be ‘boring’ (although I will need an explanation on how soccer is boring, but baseball and golf are America’s pastimes) it is a wonderfully athletic and tactical-based sport. Sudden bursts of explosive power, change of direction, looking two plays ahead, playing a ‘forcing’ based defense in which the defender uses their body/skills to change what the offensive player wanted to do – these are fantastic athletic lessons that can be filed away in the nervous system and used at a later point in any sporting activity.

2) Swimming

Unloaded shoulder and hip mobility adds a great deal of pliability to the frame of a young athlete. With so many injuries occurring due to restrictions and tightness in kids (yes… I do believe wholeheartedly that many of the youth sport injuries we see annually throughout the world could be prevented with a simple and basic increase in both systemic strength and mobility) hip and shoulder mobility initiatives are crucial.

Additionally, kinesthetic differentiation is a physical skill lacking in many kids (this refers to the knowledge of how much force is necessary to produce a desired result). My opinion on this matter is simple – everything we tend to do with kids, both in sport and training, is based on maximal efforts. In our zeal to search for those ‘performance markers’, we overlook the notion that sub-maximal efforts are both developmentally sound and build certain physical qualities not seen in high force-based outputs. Swimming is the essence of building kinesthetic differentiation – kids simply won’t last long in a pool if they put as much force as possible into every stroke.

3) Martial Arts

Almost every martial art I am familiar with is based on skill acquisition as a primary marker. Not only is that mentally and emotionally good for a child, but it infers the teaching of patience and ‘enjoying the journey’ rather than ‘searching for the destination’.

While a great deal of martial arts practices in North America have become watered down (8 year olds earning black belts – if you knew anything about traditional martial arts, you know how ridiculous that is), most organizations I am familiar with teach a wonderful style of patient skill development and discipline.

Athletically speaking, dynamic flexibility, end-range systemic strength, mobility, spatial awareness – the physical ability built through martial arts is awe-inspiring and can apply to any sport.

4) Gymnastics

Again, the physical elements that can be built through gymnastics are amazing – spatial awareness, flexibility, relative strength, dynamic and static balance – the list goes on.

If for no other reason, the ability to know where you are in space and take a fall ‘well’ is a required skill for any sport.

So… there’s my list.

Don’t get me wrong, the list is nothing without a quality coach at the helm of each of these respective sports. Martial arts instructors for instance, are often archaic in their knowledge of warm-up design as are gymnastic coaches in their practices of flexibility enhancement. Having said that, good coaches do exist and I urge you as a parent to find them. I also encourage trainers to seek out joint venture partnerships with quality coaches and augment a child’s development with solid strength and skill acquisition-based training habits.

Play soccer in the autumn.

Swim in the summer.

Participate in martial arts through the winter.

Take gymnastics in the spring.

Mix in some developmental training and play other sports recreationally for interest and development sake (basketball and baseball for example).

By the age of 13 – 14, you’ll have a solid athlete with limited injury who understands sport tactics and is strong, mobile and flexible…

Not a bad place to be!

Brian Grasso is considered one of the premier experts on youth athletic development in the world. A well-known, respected and outspoken leader within the youth athletic development industry, Brian began his sport-training career as a Performance Coach to Olympic, professional and elite athletes. Brian has enjoyed the honor of working with the following athletes as either their personal coach or consultant:

Lori Ann Muntzer - 2004 Olympic Gold Medalist
Dan Pohlman - Arizona Diamondbacks
Craig Anderson - Chicago Blackhawks
Kurt Browning – 4-time figure skating World Champion
Tanya Frank – Canadian National Women's Soccer Team
Megan Kosman – United States National Bobsled Team
Graydon Oldfield – Canadian National Downhill Ski Champion
Patrice Denis – professional football player (Canada)
Adam Sheriff-Scott – professional football player (Europe)
Kim McCullough – Dartmouth College hockey player
John Ashley – Professional European Rugby Player

 

Skoergal's comments about missing other sport's practices for one's commitment to soccer reminds me of another article on that subject which I will try to locate. This IS defintely an issue to consider for kids who play on multiple sport teams. Until I can find the actual article consider the words of a coach from Colorado:

I think these words are equally applicable to the other sports teams too.

 

Found it!

Don't Let Kids LeaveTeammates Hanging

BY RICK WOLFF

An experienced high school baseball coach recently told me about a predicament he confronted last spring. Before the season, one of his team's best players had come to the coach and said that while he loved playing varsity baseball, he also wanted to continue to play on his travel soccer team.


The youngster told the coach that the soccer team played mostly weekends in major tournaments where he could showcase his skills to colleges. The athlete acknowledged that there would be conflicts between his soccer and baseball schedules, but the coach didn't think the player really seemed to care. He just wanted to do both.


How did the coach handle the athlete's request? "At first I didn't know what to say," he told me. "I was just sort of stunned that a high school senior didn't understand the basic concept of team commitment and how it applied to him. So I explained that commitment to a team has to be 100 percent. It just won't work any other way. I told the youngster to make a choice, and he chose soccer."

End of the story? Not quite.

The coach wasn't surprised when the player's parents complained. They didn't see a problem with the conflicts, even though the coach explained that it wouldn't be fair to players who were there for every game and practice. But when other parents complained-"He's one of our best players," they said. "You're penalizing the whole team, even though he'd be there for most of the games"-the coach began to wonder if his understanding of team commitment had become outdated.


Not too long ago these kinds of conversations never would have taken place. Young athletes wouldn't dream of ever missing a practice, much less a game. They understood what coaches meant when they enforced the team concept from the first week of practice onward. "It's not fair to everyone else if you miss a practice," coaches would bark at us. "If you aren't here and fall behind, the rest of the team loses out, because we're counting on you."


The problem can be traced to a change in the way kids are introduced to sports. These days, youngsters grow up playing two and sometimes three sports in one season. It's not unusual for an eight-year-old to play soccer, hockey and maybe tennis during the fall. Perhaps team commitment is not taken as seriously at these younger ages. Besides, it's the rare eight-year-old who has soccer practice or hockey practice five days in a row right after school. So it's a little easier to balance it all.


But as athletes advance through their community sports programs, the team commitment should
become more of a priority. At the high school level, coaches usually want their athletes to be just as devoted to the team's Success as the coach himself is. He isn't going to be too keen on letting a player show up whenever it's "convenient." Like that baseball coach, he'll expect everyone to be there all the time or not at all (with the exception of injury, illness or other such circumstances).


So what's the answer? While it may be difficult for talented young athletes to choose one sport during each season, in most cases, that's what they must do to be fair to their teammates and coaches. And if an athlete decides that he just doesn't think he can miss out on playing for a travel team, then he should make it clear to his travel team coach that his high school team comes first.


It goes beyond just fairness to others. The athlete herself benefits by being committed to a team. Players learn how to work together toward common goals and how to sacrifice personal glory (and ego) for the greater good of a team. Grinding away on a daily basis with one's coaches and teammates creates camaraderie and self-discovery.

But to make all this happen, everything starts with the athlete saying, "Yes, I will always be here."

Rick Wolff is chairman of the Center for Sports Parenting (www.sportsparenting.org).

 

Great articles!

I completely agree with the first one about multi sporting it at a young age resulting in a kid that at 13-14 years is well developed mentally and physically as an athlete...

Good point about the team committment aspect of multi sporting (I feel like I have just made this word up as a technical term, so go with me on this one ) But I would almost say that is being too black and white in a very grey world. Again it is definitely an age appropriate thing. It again comes down to what is the biggest priority for a coach--recognizing the fact that for a 12/13/14 year old kid it is probably a good thing for them in their development as athletes and people to have the opportunity to play other sports and be lenient in allowing them to miss a practice once in a while to allow them the opportunity to still play and be a part of other sports. I see a lot of coaches who take it personally that a kid is missing "their" practice and then will punish them accordingly. I think everyone needs to look at what is best for the kids.

However, that being said, again as a coach, it is important to recognize the efforts of the kids that are at every practice. Again, this comes into play, the level that we are talking here as well as the age. If it is 14 year olds, if Susie chooses that she wants to play volleyball as well, and Jenny has been at every practice, then sure explain it to Susie that Jenny has been there and that is why she isn't starting. At a lot of higher levels, though, it does come down to just winning. I am playing this summer on a very competitive team, and we have had a lot of people away missing games and practices for national team commitments. It is understood that the goal is to win and that this is the highest level, so these players do come in and start and play, and the fact that many of us have been there all year doesn't really come into play. Its about who can perform best. So I guess my point is that yes, teaching kids team committment is very important, but also its equally an important lesson for them to learn that life isn't fair and black and white, and that especially as they get older its about performance as well.

Running off to a game, sorry for not the most cohesive of thoughts, but just thought I would throw them into the mixer. Really learning a lot from this conversation, so thanks everyone!

 

An interesting twist on this is MPR in recreational. Last season, I had a boy who did not show up for practice for the last 6 weeks. At U9, he gets to play a minimum of 1/2 the game. And his father is quick to point out that he paid as much money as any other parent on the team (which is a lie, I paid more as the coach. ).

As a coach interested in win at all costs, I would love to sit the player out as much as possible. Ideally, I don't even want him getting the MPR.

As a coach interested in player development, I want to make sure he gets as much time in the game as possible. Ideally, I want to make sure he gets as much time as every other kid there.

Last season, I chose to let the chips fall on the player development side of things. And I alienated several players over this, or at least their parents. I won't have to make the choice this season, the kid is not coming back. One of the parent/kids I alienated is coming back - the other asked for another coach.

I think I am ready for the talk this season where we discuss commitment and playing time. That kid was a hole in my line every game he showed up for. And he really hurt the team's progress in practices.

But my goal isn't increasing wins, it is increasing their knowledge that their actions impact others. If it means they only play MPR or I ask the club for a ruling to have them only play 1/4 of the time, then so be it.

I understand that the child can not control whether his parents bring him to practice or not. But, when that parent is there, asking why their child is not playing, I can provide feedback right there and then.

Parents also make commitments when they sign their children up for a sport. I've seen too many who seem to think I am a babysitter.

 

On the contrary. Great post. It illustrates to coaches how to handle multi-sport athletes.

Now, it's one thing to balance the gymnastics, soccer, and diving coaches. Can you tell me how to get the softball, soccer, and basketball coaches to play nice in the sandbox together? LOL!