I am not a referee. As far as I know, cards in friendlies do not carry over into meaningful competitions (unless there is something extremely serious that would warrant special sanction). Is this true? I know that referees are often more lenient in friendly games. My question is why? Is it just something they have always done with no real reason, or is there some logic? In my mind, physical fouls should be more harshly dealt with in a friendly than in a "real" game. An injury to a player due to a dangerous foul is always unfortunate but to me it's even worse when that injury occurs in a game that has less meaning.
Well, there's no single right answer to this, because not all friendlies are created equal. Some, like international friendlies, which factor in to FIFA rankings, might not be played or reffed differently than any other game. Others are glorified scrimmages, and are much more lax. But, in general, cards are given less often in friendlies because cards are, in large part, a method of match control for the referee. The line of thinking is that because there is less to play for, it is unlikely that the match will get out of control, and thus cards are less necessary. Also, friendlies are often "practice games", which means it is often beneficial to both teams to have 22 players on the field. Thus, there may be pressure to not give cheap yellow cards, or to have a bit more lenience on DOGSO decisions. Personally, unless a game is explicitly an informal scrimmage, I don't really change my reffing style for a friendly vs a regular league game.
Case in point. MLS All Star v. Bayern this summer. One team thought it a friendly, the other did not.
I once did an international club friendly with Ricardo Valenzuela as the referee. In the pre-game, he said, "This is a friendly. What is our primary duty in a friendly?" I replied, "To keep it friendly." "Exactly."
This is seriously flawed logic. If neither team shows up with intentions of being friendly then you are in for a long match. You can't keep something friendly that never started out that way.
It's great logic. We need to manage the game so that it remains a friendly - unlike the MLS - Bayern game!
You completely fail to see the point. You say 'remains' but if one team shows up with no intentions of being friendly, then it never started out that way and therefore it can't remain that way. And I believe you mean MLS All Stars vs Bayern Munich? Whether Bayern liked it or not, it is a professional match and if they don't want to put their big boy pants on that day then put some young scrubs on that are willing to play 100%.
I referee a dozen scrimmages and friendlies a year. They come in two flavors. 1 - NFHS scrimmages, which fall under NFHS rules, don't allow much in the way of rule modification, and are often the final tryouts for the team. Tryouts lead to players trying too hard and sudden/unexpected fouls from a player trying to impress a coach. Handle with care. 2 - Games between club teams, which fall under USSF. These games are always one offs, between teenagers on competitive teams. I find I can generally convince coaches to support hockey/lacrosse penalty box style player management for cautions. Gives the player a chance to cool off, the coach a chance to bend an ear, and creates peer pressure to behave because the remaining ten have to work a bit extra for the duration.
I've found coaches supportive of immediate substitution to allow a hothead to cool off after a caution, but I've never suggested (or had suggested to me) that the team play short. I'd be willing to go along with it, but I personally wouldn't try to promote it.