What MLS Needs to Do to Survive Until 2020 Either this guy is auditioning for The Onion or I have the "The Things Mark Jones Must Do Before Writing About MLS Again" 1. Stop Smoking Crack 2. Stop Smoking Crack 3. Stop Smoking Crack 4. Stop Smoking Crack 5. Stop Smoking Crack 6. Stop Smoking Crack 7. Stop Smoking Crack 8. Stop Smoking Crack 9. Stop Smoking Crack 10. Stop Smoking Crack This is either the funniest or saddest thing I have ever read. I know it's Bleacher Report and all that, but they really shouldn't hire the mentally infirm.
Obviously, the piece is arrogant and trite, but it doesn't even make sense from the viewpoint on a retarded xenophobe: 1. Smaller field does not make for more offense; rather, it takes away space. 2. Scoring lag after the 70th? If anything, it's the opposite. 3. The shootout is not valued by American fans in hockey, the only one using such a system. There's no real basis for this claim. 4. More penalty calls just furthers the idea that it's the only way to score in soccer and that fouls are way too cheap. 5. The weekly games are not unlike what we see in the biggest league on this continent.
Scariest part of the whole article That guy drives the same streets as I do. He's out there. Doing God knows what, smoking God knows what, waiting to kill me and my children. Pray for me.