These online pervs...

You do know that you can pick and choose who you want to see your profile on Facebook and myspace. What is the big deal about facebook being in highschools?

 

Yet again, why is this a problem?

 

Highschool kids should be responsible enough to manage Facebook. If not, their parents and schools did something wrong. Now, if primary school kids are allowed to join (which they could theoretically I guess) I'd worry.

 

Is this supposed to be ironic? What world are you living in? I truly believe that the percentage of parents who raise their kids, to act with the capacity you suggest, is below 50%.

I'm not trying to be insulting or bash your post. I just truly believe this. Properly raised kids, in my experience, are not the norm and I knew MANY friends growing up who had absolutely NO supervision, whatsoever.

 

and even raised in a good home ... kids will be kids. that means they'll be stupid, brash and do all the dumb things we did (except now they have technology at their fingertips that we couldn't dream of. but we would've done the same thing if we could).

Good post Twenty26Six.

 

That is probably at least 10 points too high.

 

well if your kids are stupid enough to reveal the type of information that could be potentially dangerous to a complete stranger then its no surprise that they get into these types of situations.

Myspace/Facebook are only as dangerous as the information you choose to put in them.

 

Yes!! Damn you 11yo Sara, it was your fault your Father never bothered to pay attention to you. Now it's your fault you got molested by some creepy sociopath, b.c no one told you the world was inherently evil and you should shelter yourselves at all times!

Riiiiight.

How about we think with a broader perspective and take into account the preteen kids who don't have an IQ over 115 [or overly protective parents]?

 

well considering they have C.A.R.E. and D.A.R.E. programs in schools across the nation, kids SHOULD know better than to provide this sort of information.

 

I used to smoke dope, while wearing my D.A.R.E. t-shirt. Since when do part-time afterschool programs make for good parents?

 

That may be true..but C.A.R.E. is focused on domestic abuse..which is the primary cause of these types of cases

however, i agree D.A.R.E. is a waste of time. But getting into drugs has a lot to do with peer pressure, which is impossible to escape. But how many kids are getting pressured to talk to online perverts at age 11 these days?

 

I've been sarcastic, yes, but this is serious in my opinion and is a deeper problem than people expect. So, I'll be serious for a moment.

It is about doing what your friends are doing and if your friends are in adult chat rooms, you will be or want to be. That will happen regardless of new internet security filters or parental controls. Those are places that predators hang out.

BUT! This isn't about "predators" per se. Those guys are far and few between. What people need to worry about is the behavior they condone when they expect their children to be "adult" at 11-14. They're going to want to do adult things at that age anyway and more so if they have adult responsibilities or attitudes. That is where you have to worry about young girls [11-14] being influenced - not by "TV perverts" - but by 17-24yo males.

I've seen it happen. There are unsupervised preteen girls left unsupervised and unaware of the possible dangers they are in. And, IMO, one underage girl that gets exploited is too many. A passive - "kids, parent should know better" is not going to protect these kids, b.c the parents and kids just don't know any better.

 

Spoken like someone who has never been around children.

You're right that these type of Web sites, even BigSoccer are only as dangerous as the information people put in them. But you should also know that kids don't understand all of the risks involved, and in most cases, it take multiple conversations AND aggressive follow up to get the message through. And then sometimes it still doesn't sink in.

Sachin

 

It seems to me that the most susceptible kind of teenager on the internet is a lonely one--doesn't matter what their I.Q. or training when there are emotional issues to weigh in.

 

Lonely. That is a good point, thank you. You could add low self-esteem and not given enough attention from their parents as factors.

 

Still though, your kid has to be an idiot to invite someone they met on the internet into their homes, like on "To Catch a Predator".

 

Reckless, yes. Idiots, nah.

I speak from very reckless experiences in my past. I knew what the dangers were, acknowledged them but took my chances. Luckily for my reckless past self, everybody I met from online was pretty close to what I expected.

(p.s. And in defense of the "idiot" theory, I usually met people in public places and not alone... So maybe my behavior would be classed separately...)

 

no, it makes your kid a kid. Every kid (yes, even you) did stupid things. the stakes might be a bit higher, but a kid using poor judgement doesn't make them an idiot. It makes them a kid.

 

Good points.

We use the term "experienced adult" to differentiate them from an "inexperienced kid." Kids see the internet rather like a video game but with a critical difference - the bad guys on the video game are not real, the bad guys on the internet are. An adult can usually tell the difference and avoid pitfalls that a teen will not.

Pervs LOVE the internet. It is like bringing the fishing pond right to their doorstep. We do our children no benefit by not recognizing that fact and keeping them away from these sites.

 

But, as always this isn't an easy issue. How do you teach you child to live in fear of a relatively slim chance of exploitation, without instilling in them a sense of fear that pervades all their activities? Or how can you succesfully shelter them from things?

Best bet is to always be there for your kids. So that their first friend, peer, person they trust and go to, is you. Then, perhaps, focus on them becoming responsible and strong people. But that is not easy, by any means.

 

Oh and by the way, if any of you are ever in town, you should totally come see me and my kids. It'd be like awesome!!!

<sarcasm may have been employed in the above post>

 

It all comes down to having parents that teach and closely watch what their kids are doing. Here is where I recommend folks start:

Play soccer and NOT video games.

Use the telephone to talk to friends, NEVER MySpace or Facebook until they are 16 AND maintaining a 3.0 average in school.

The above should be ironclad rules if children are to receive an education and stay safe.

My wife is a Language Arts teacher in middle school, been there for over 20 years now. By the end of the first week, she can tell which kids play video games by the blank stare they display in the classroom. This week is parent conference week. 50% of the parents won't show up for a conference. Of the ones that do, most of them have children that are doing well. (duh!) The few who do show, that have kids who are doing poorly, commonly say they "just can't get him off the video games," "or she is always on her MySpace site."

And then there are the "parents" who just didn't place any value on education in their life and do the same to their kids....