By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
  1. Dan Loney

    Dan Loney BigSoccer Supporter

    Mar 10, 2000
    Cincilluminati
    Club:
    Los Angeles Sol
    Country:
    Philippines
    #1 Dan Loney, Sep 20, 2017
    Last edited: Sep 20, 2017

    NASL - Waive Goodbye

    By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
    What do you do with a corpse?

    You bury it. Or you burn it. Maybe you scatter the ashes, maybe you keep it in an urn and cherish the memories.

    But you have to dispose of it somehow. Otherwise, you get a horrific smell, and a breeding ground for disease and maggots.

    What do you do with a walking corpse?

    You shoot it in the head. Or you put a stake in its heart. Preferably both. A walking corpse is unnatural and unholy, and wants only to feast on the living blood of the innocent.

    And what should the US Soccer Federation do with the NASL and the New York Cosmos?

    They should give them exactly what they’re asking for.

    Thanks to Knave, on This Very Site, for posting the link to this comedy cavalcade. But here's the important part, for a given definition of "important."

    In this case, the NASL seeks two principal forms of relief.

    First, it seeks a preliminary injunction to preserve the status quo during the pendency of this litigation to prevent the USSF from implementing its decision to revoke the NASL’s Division II status, so that it is does not face the immediate prospect of being driven out of existence as a competitor, and can continue to build its league to a level where it can eventually compete with MLS, while it pursues its antitrust rights in this Court.

    Second , the NASL seeks a declaratory judgment and permanent injunction striking down the USSF’s Professional League Standards and other divisional rules as a violation of Sections 1 and 2 of the Sherman Act so that, going forward, competition and consumers, as opposed to the USSF’s anticompetitive rules and conspiracy, will determine which professional soccer leagues are able to compete as top-tier men’s professional soccer leagues located in the U.S. and Canada and which ones are able to compete in the second tier—the free market situation that exists for all other major professional team sports leagues in the U.S. Competition, rather than private conspiracies, would then be restored in the relevant markets.

    Done!

    Seriously, why not? If divisional standards are what's holding the NASL and the New York Cosmos back from glory, isn't it in the best interests of everyone to give them enough rope? It's not like waivers cost anything. They probably have a macro for them.

    Here, let me whip something up for ya, Sunil:

    __________________

    To: The Honorable Mr. Rocco Commisso
    Recipient, Foreign Policy Association Medal of Honor
    Owner, New York Cosmos Soccer Club
    Chairman, North American Soccer League

    Dear yinz,

    Aww, does the baby want its bottle? Is the baby going to cwy its widdle eyes out?

    Have we or have we not literally gone through this bullshit seven times already? You’re not here for the hunting, are you, Frank?

    You know why we have divisional standards, Jim? To prevent people like you from coming in, taking out corporate credit cards and then taking the last couple months of payroll and fleeing for the Cayman Islands. Makes the sport look bad. We’re still cleaning up from the last bunch of red-assed baboons who threw their crap all over the walls, and the fact that you’ve named yourself after those same god-damned baboons doesn’t put you on my Christmas card list.

    It’s not our fault that every one of your teams worth a tinker’s piss in a high wind wants to peace out on your sorry-ass little flea circus. Hey, what happened to that hot sexy world-famous brand that was gonna knock us all on our asses? Looks like you dropped some equity somewhere between Hofstra and Coney Island, brah.

    It’s not us, it’s you. We’ll prove it.

    By the power vested in me by not being a god-damned clown about crap like this, I hereby award you the Order of the First Division, complete with propeller beanie, coat of arms, and Certificate of Being Really Really Important and Relevant.

    Now let’s see if you, that guy who isn’t David Beckham and Delta House can draw more fans than Chivas USA on Free Punch In The Dick Night. If that fails, well, I dunno what to tell you, Sparkles. Maybe hand out Cosmos-branded Ex-Lax so someone might give a crap.

    If you have any further questions, please address them to the Complaints Department in my pants. Now go play with your starry balls and stop bothering normal folks.

    Your obedient servant,

    Sunil Gulati
    Undefeated three-time champion of US Soccer

    cc: any NASL clubs who haven’t already sent a forwarding address to USL

    _________________________

    The New York Cosmos are parasites, living off the name and the work of others. They probably always were. In the 70’s, they were a rounding error in the Warner Brothers cocaine budget. It was Studio 54 first, Cosmos second, league third, and American soccer nowhere.

    What, exactly, are we trying to revive? Teams that folded after an average of two years? Crummy owners? Artificial turf? American soccer without Americans? American soccer reduced to a stupid, trendy fad?

    Fine. This time let there be no doubt. Give them a bowl. Give them some water. Give them their little can of flakes. Sooner or later, they’re going to have to flush the goldfish down the toilet.

    And then we can scrape these grifting incompetents off our shoes and get back to actually supporting the game.

    Until then, here’s a little smattering of the Cosmos metaphorically, and literally, writing checks their swirlies couldn’t cash:

    By joining the NASL, the Cosmos had what it sorely needed, a place from which they could execute their business strategy. That strategy, again, meant being a local team with a global presence. The team was excited by the NASL’s business model and felt it was more reflective of the systems throughout the professional soccer world. In addition to not having a salary cap, team ownership was decentralized, as opposed to the unique single-entity model employed by Major League Soccer. Because of the Cosmos’s rich history and strong brand name, the new team owners felt they would be sacrificing too much to the centralized MLS ownership structure, including the right to market and sell Cosmos’ business interests. Also, the expansion fee required for the Cosmos to join the NASL was orders of magnitude less than what was being discussed in MLS ($100 million). The team felt it would be better to use the saved money on putting together a strong collection of veteran and young players that could regularly compete for a league championship and in outside competitions.
    __________________

    Bill Peterson, commissioner of the NASL, described the league's relationship with MLS as "cordial."

    "What [MLS] does doesn't affect us, and what we do doesn't affect them," Peterson said. "We don't make any of our decisions based on what they do."

    The two leagues have publicly maintained their distance. Earlier this year, MLS announced a player development partnership with the Division III United Soccer League, which effectively created a funnel for talent that bypassed NASL.

    "We have no desire to be anyone's minor league," Peterson said. "We definitely have no interest in developing players for other leagues."

    ….

    Stover, who was formerly the managing director of the New York Red Bulls, said the Cosmos hold another advantage over MLS teams because of the NASL's lack of a salary cap. The team, he said, can sign short-term deals with international players and accept other stars on loan, which MLS teams can't always do because of commercial restrictions.

    "Commercially, we can think like a global soccer club," Stover said. "We can do deals without a ton of restrictions."
    ________________________

    Cosmos ownership is solid, well-financed and well-organized. The Cosmos refused to pay Don Garber’s premium MLS expansion fee of $100 million for a New York City entry, yet proposed their own $400 million stadium out at Belmont. It wasn’t the money that was the problem with MLS, so much as it was the idea of ceding control to a single entity system. The Cosmos are still the Cosmos, prideful to the point of arrogance.
    ________________________________

    But O’Brien, his Saudi partners and the NASL itself were over-extended and as the league teetered on the brink, he was looking to divest. The Cosmos had lost a reported $30 million. Their dream of a stadium and mixed-use development at Belmont Park had been strangled by red tape. Toward the end of last November, about two weeks after it defeated Indy Eleven in the NASL final, the club began furloughing front office staff and releasing players from their contracts. Employees who remained went unpaid. O’Brien was deep into negotiations with GF Capital Management, a New York private equity firm, and had to cut costs. GF Capital, meanwhile, had no interest in fielding a soccer team and wasn’t concerned with the future of the NASL. It was after that punch. It wanted the logo.

    ….

    Furthermore, MLS didn’t really resemble his vision of New York soccer. It’s a city of bright lights, and it's home to the biggest stars. Those players aren't common in MLS.

    “I haven’t been to an MLS or an NASL game at all,” Commisso said. “Largely because I’m one of those that understands who the best players in the world are, who the best leagues in the world are. When I want to watch a real soccer game, I wouldn’t go to watch New York City [FC]. I’ll watch Juventus. I’ll watch the Italian league. I’ll watch the Spanish league.”

    Players like that once turned out for the Cosmos.

    “Seventy-thousand people at Giants Stadium. Despite the fact we were playing on Astroturf, they were the greatest professional games I ever saw in America,” he said.

    Commisso admitted that he didn’t see the original Cosmos play in person more than 10 times. But they left an impression that lasted 30 years. They represented American soccer’s possibility and remain its most compelling, surreal story. So when Commisso learned late last year that the reborn Cosmos were for sale and that their flesh-and-blood future was at stake, he realized he’d found a calling.
    _______________________

    "I think it’s fair to say that the Cosmos had a chance to come into MLS several years ago and opted not to do that. We respected that decision and don’t see a scenario where they come into our league.”’
     
?

So what do you think Henry Kissinger and the Cosmos were chatting about in the Studio 54 men's room?

  1. Cambodia's chances in the World Cup, what with Pol Pot and all

    3 vote(s)
    12.5%
  2. South Vietnam's chances in the World Cup, what with Saigon and all

    3 vote(s)
    12.5%
  3. Chile's chances in the World Cup, what with Pinochet and all

    5 vote(s)
    20.8%
  4. This up-and-coming young lawyer from Yale named Hillary Rodham

    13 vote(s)
    54.2%

Comments

Discussion in 'Articles' started by Dan Loney, Sep 20, 2017.

    1. JulesMIA

      JulesMIA Member

      MBU
      United States
      Sep 19, 2017

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Yes, at this point NASL should be buried. It isn't doing anything for American soccer, and its owners/leadership have become a real annoyance.
       
      SteveCo repped this.
    2. Martininho

      Martininho Member+

      Feb 13, 2007
      Chicago
      Club:
      --other--
      Country:
      United States

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Game. Set. Match.
       
    3. AEAAFC96

      AEAAFC96 Member+

      Mar 27, 2006
      NYC
      Club:
      Arsenal FC
      Country:
      United States

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      The Cosmos were using the NASL as a means to say "Up yours" to MLS. MLS just went, "Yeah, whatever mother*****, walked away.

      Now the Cosmos is hoping the courts save their pathetic asses. Ask Trump of how that worked out with the USFL.
       
    4. MM66

      MM66 Member

      Mar 9, 2009
      Brookline, MA
      Club:
      Real Madrid

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      The NASL lawsuit likely is going nowhere, beyond stoking Dan's Cosmos/NASL fixation. The modern NASL actually strikes me as the subject for a great book - fascinating mix of players, teams owned by a cast of disreputable characters, a league constantly on the fringe of non-existence. Yeah, it's a throwback to its former incarnation - and the ABA, AHL and USFL - but the chaos of a league looking to bootstrap itself into relevance makes for a great story - even if such efforts always fall before the might of the establishment.

      Dan's hatred of this bizarre, misshapen thing feels like Dan's working for the Ministry of Truth and NASL has been declared a thoughtcrime - or maybe it's therapy. I wish some charlatan would stick a fly by night NASL team in Boston so I could stop giving the oh-so-reputable Bob Kraft my money. Anyway, my take on the NASL is thank goodness someone still has the good sense to do something stupid.
       
    5. Beau Dure

      Beau Dure Member+

      May 31, 2000
      Vienna, VA

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      I would gladly have gone to Virginia Cavalry games if that team had ever gotten off the ground. Easier for me to get to than D.C. United games.

      But I'm one of those weird people who'll go see live soccer even if Messi isn't playing.
       
    6. MM66

      MM66 Member

      Mar 9, 2009
      Brookline, MA
      Club:
      Real Madrid

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Hey, there were 42,000+ of those weirdos in Atlanta last night and 70,000+ over the weekend. I feel like that ought to be the biggest sports story in the country right now. Something's up, and not just in Atlanta. It's like people want to go to soccer games. We're the new nerd culture.
       
    7. barroldinho

      barroldinho Member+

      Aug 13, 2007
      Ex-pat in HB, CA
      Club:
      Manchester United FC
      Country:
      England

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      It always amuses me that the US-based soccer folks that frequently model their following of the game on "what they do in Europe", frequently fall down on the somewhat fundamental tenet that you aren't supposed to choose which team you support, based on their odds of winning the Champions League.
       
      That Phat Hat, SteveCo, Zenit and 3 others repped this.
    8. Beau Dure

      Beau Dure Member+

      May 31, 2000
      Vienna, VA

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Exactly.

      "The European system makes Real Madrid possible!"

      OK. It also makes MK Dons possible.
       
      russ, athletics68, Chesco United and 2 others repped this.
    9. Q*bert Jones III

      Q*bert Jones III The People's Poet

      Feb 12, 2005
      Woodstock, NY
      Club:
      DC United

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      This is Vintage Loney and it makes me miss the old MLS Rivalries Annual Smack Offs.
       
      russ, barroldinho and Martininho repped this.
    10. nicklaino

      nicklaino Member+

      Feb 14, 2012
      Brooklyn, NY
      Club:
      Manchester United FC

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Sometimes you cut it up. Put the pieces in an industrial garbage bag and put it in a landfill. Or put it in a construction site and pour cement or tar over it. Then it becomes a road or a bridge or a football stadium. Or put it in a weighted drum and drop it in the ocean. Then people say what ever happen to him?
       
      SteveCo and Dan Loney repped this.
    11. nicklaino

      nicklaino Member+

      Feb 14, 2012
      Brooklyn, NY
      Club:
      Manchester United FC

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      There doing that at the Supreme Court building in Brooklyn. Lot of good food vendors near there. Last time I was there they had people asking other people to sign a petition to end the death penalty. I told them sure I will sign it. Then I said you want to know why? I told them any way maybe one of the lifers will get a chance to kill a guard while there inside.
       
    12. Mateofelipe

      Mateofelipe Member+

      Mar 10, 2001
      Spokane, WA
      Club:
      Seattle Sounders
      Country:
      United States

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Kissinger to Pele: "The future of professional soccer in this country is far too important to be decided by anybody with any goddamned sense."
       
      The Franchise and AndyMead repped this.
    13. The411

      The411 Member

      Oct 12, 2013

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      Waaaaah, why don't we give all the MLS teams participation ribbons. I don't care for the suit, but the sands are running out on the MLS hourglass. Either the owners are lying (they are regardless) or no one is making money.

      Btw for the MLS to survive they need teams like MK Dons to stable young talent. Surely MLS teams aren't going to rely on the pay to play system and the NCAAs for talent ... as if that has worked out so far ...
       
    14. Beau Dure

      Beau Dure Member+

      May 31, 2000
      Vienna, VA

      NASL - Waive Goodbye

      By Dan Loney on Sep 20, 2017 at 11:41 AM
      So what do you know about MLS that the people who want to pay $100 million (or more) to join do not? Be specific.
       
      AndyMead repped this.

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