By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
  1. Dan Loney

    Dan Loney BigSoccer Supporter

    Mar 10, 2000
    Cincilluminati
    Club:
    Los Angeles Sol
    Nat'l Team:
    Philippines
    #1 Dan Loney, Feb 28, 2019
    Last edited: Mar 1, 2019

    MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

    By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
    But not yet have we solved the incantation of this whiteness, and learned why it appeals with such power to the soul; and more strange and far more portentous – why, as we have seen, it is at once the most meaning symbol of spiritual things, nay, the very veil of the Christian's Deity; and yet should be as it is, the intensifying agent in things the most appalling to mankind.

    - Herman Melville, "Moby-Dick"

    They just didn't care.

    - Mystery Science Theater 3000, "Attack of the The Eye Creatures"

    What's particularly galling about the 2019 Crap Rides a Pale Horse collection that Adidas has bestowed upon poor, long-suffering MLS teams is that no, as a matter of fact, the white shirts are not all the same. Real Salt Lake has red glitches. Philadelphia has their snake radiating rays of, unity? I don't know. New England has two shades of white. Dallas, San Jose and Orlando have stripes – stripes it would take Antonie Van Freaking Leeuwenhoek to make out, but by golly there they are. Vancouver, Chicago and the Galaxy have big stripes, and are probably all really grateful this year. The Rapids get to have the Colorado flag as a jock tag. The Red Bulls even get to wear gray, with sublimated inspirational words. It's godawful! You'll love it!

    So it's possible to individualize these things. And none of them would be infuriating, in the traditional Major League Soccer sense, by themselves. Colorado in particular showed, with its impressive "Black Diamond" campaign, that a spare look by itself can be attractive and interesting. Imagine how effective it would have been if the Rapids weren't lost in a sea of white deeper than Tony Montana's conference room. The "Black Diamond" loses a lot of its luster when it's rolled out next to obvious low-effort, they'll-buy-it-anyway nonsense like Cincinnati's inaugural replica.

    Fortunately I have solutions. Don't I always?

    I've read that some of this stems from FIFA wanting as much contrast as possible, but on the one hand I'm skeptical of FIFA trial balloons, and on the other hand, who cares what FIFA thinks? What are they going to do, disband the league? Give the World Cup to Morocco? "Hey, when San Jose and Kansas City play, those are two shades of blue and it can be confusing" WHO CARES. If Gianni doesn't like it, let him watch college football like everyone else.

    The real issue is league-wide rollouts and templates. Major League Soccer is a collective that ants and bees would admire, but a consistent brand identity is the last thing sports fans want. Bears and Packers fans don't want to look alike. The Yankees don't want to adapt to anyone else, and should frankly be annoyed with the White Sox at this point. So is Columbus the only team that gets to be different? Was it just because Garber didn't think they'd be in the league?

    Well, and Seattle. Maybe this was just Adidas making sure that the Puget Vice design was well-received. And it worked! I love it! Compared to all the others!

    So mix it up more, Adidas. As far as we're concerned, FIFA is a deep-sea fishing industry association. If they say you have to work with white – ignore them. You got peach to work last year, didn't you?

    But Adidas, despite the high-hat they gave to Cincinnati, isn't the issue here. The clubs need to assert their identity. Stop thinking in terms of black and white – please. The first set should be something iconic – and that's up to the club to figure out, and it may take years. Some teams get it right in year one, like DC and Chicago. Some take a little longer, like the Galaxy. Some might never. But the goal is, eventually, a consistent primary jersey.

    The second shirt can be a little more fun. "What WOULD we look like in purple, green and clear?" If it's fun and it sells, great! If it stinks, who cares? You're punishing the other team's fans. The RSL, LAFC and Seattle shirts are, in this case, perfectly done. Imagine how successful the Rapids' Black Diamond spiel would have been if six other teams weren't using the same thesaurus.

    The third jersey should be something local. Like, obnoxiously local. City flag shirts are the obvious choice here, of course, and of course throwbacks and fauxbacks. But something for diehard fans, obsessive and devoted supporters – the sort of person who would buy and wear a third jersey, basically.

    Lastly, let the teams pick their own number fonts. This league-wide design nonsense makes every team look interchangeable. The convenience isn't worth the anonymity. And don't tell me this opens the door to bringing back the Tampa Bay Mutiny LED clock numbers. First of all, that would be glorious. Second, the entire league had LED clock fonts for a couple of years, and it looked trite. It's great when one team does something off-center, not so much when four hundred players are wearing the same thing. Baseball is so clearly your model here, it's not funny – look at all the different ways teams can be interesting. How stupid and boring would it look if the Red Sox had the same number set as the Blue Jays? MLS stupid and boring, that's how.

    I rant about this because it's so frustratingly fixable. Nobody in the world is thinking "MLS has consistent numbers, like the Premier League. So, the quality of play must be as high as the Premiership." At least, I hope nobody is. If they are, MLS should not be encouraging that sort of person to out in public unsupervised.
    _______________________

    No, the title is not a reference to the MLS coaching ranks.
    _______________________

    I agree with Bill about Robert Kraft, and I hope they put him and his family on a heated griddle until they recite everything they know about human trafficking in iambic pentameter. This is a Department of Justice matter, after all, nothing against Jupiter police, and I hope heads roll and blood is spilt.

    _______________________

    So, quick MLS guesses:

    EAST:

    1. Atlanta – you know, if they wore blue and black, they could be Atlanta Atalanta. Stop me if I've told you that one
    2. New York Transhudson
    3. New York Cishudson
    4. DC United - unless Ben Olsen is the problem? Nah, couldn't be
    5. Cincinnati – everyone has them down to be inaugural Minnesota United/inaugural Salt Lake level of stink here, so I'm going to be cool and different. And, very likely, wrong.
    6. Columbus – I underrate and underappreciate Caleb Porter, and think the Crew will lose a few steps in the transition. But rediscovered home field energy could put them in the top three.
    7. Montreal. I'm overrating these guys something fierce, aren't I.
    8. Orlando – the WORST thing about MLS is trying to decide whether to give the last playoff spot to Orlando or Montreal, or a similarly inconsequential choice.
    9. Toronto FC – until they show otherwise, 2017 was a fluke engineered by the little guy they ran out of town. Prove me wrong, Coach Greg with One G. [Edit - two G's, technically, but]
    10. I hate putting Chicago down here etc. etc. see above except for the Sting and early Fire actually winning stuff. Does the Fire actually still have an owner?
    11. I hate putting New England down here every year. They're, like, the fossil record of pro soccer, but first the NASL in the 70's now MLS gives a market that should be – and has been – top two pure garbage. But I have to keep them down here until ownership changes.

    WEST:

    1. Sporting Kansas City, by enough to get the Shield, maybe
    2. Seattle
    3. Portland
    4. You know what, screw it, kick off for the regular season is in twenty minutes or so, and I'm super-optimistic about at least two teams IF crap gets resolved by Call to the Post. And I have no rational reason to believe it will, but let me just assume the very best here and start over.

    1. Sporting Kansas City.
    2. Seattle. I think they'll be fine without Ozzie, what do you think of that, huh?
    3. The Galaxy could begin the season a little light and fragile up front, a little unreliable in the back – and freaking loaded with money. Or they could have a couple of fraternal millstones for another season. I'm choosing to believe if LA were going to keep Gio under any circumstances, they'd have done so by now. They'll stink early, sign a huge name – maybe two, they have room and creativity – and get white-hot by October. Or they'll finish nineteenth.
    4. San Jose was my surprise to be sneaky good, until rumors started circulating that Club America wanted to beat them up and steal their coach. I also don't think too highly of the West this year, truth be told. But Almeyda shows an institutional willingness to go in the right direction, even if Almeyda himself doesn't work out. And I don’t think much of the West this year.
    5. Okay, rationally Portland should be up a few spots, since according to one recent ranking – the ACTUAL PLAYOFFS – they were the best of this lot
    6. Minnesota. You heard me. Can't very well say DC, Cincy and Columbus will ride home field advantages and not include the team opening their new home, can I?
    7. Vancouver. Here's a mystery team. They could rocket all the way to sixth, or drop all the way to eighth.
    8. Or maybe Dallas makes the playoffs? Why am I not sold on their new coach? Because whoever finishes seventh has a chance to WIN IT ALL, BABY, and I want to get this pick right
    9. I guess I could pick Houston to win the Open Cup again
    10. How the hell did the Rams make it to the Super Bowl with Kroenke in charge? Hell, how did the Rapids win an MLS Cup with Kroenke in charge?
    11. I'm not letting my biases guide my judgment, I have arrived at the conclusion that LAFC suck and I hate them on strictly empirical data, careful observation and solid facts. By the way, what does happen if LAFC does become the indwelling for Chivas USA and starts having Tarp Appreciation Night, have we planned for that?

    Shield: Kansas City
    Open Cup: Chattanooga Red Wolves (USL)
    MLS Cup: New York Red Bulls. I think this is their year, and the season-long race against Atlanta will be a towering classic in any case.
     
?

Who Will Win MLS Cup 2019?

  1. Nashville

    2 vote(s)
    22.2%
  2. Inter Miami

    5 vote(s)
    55.6%
  3. Other (please specify in comments)

    2 vote(s)
    22.2%

Comments

Discussion in 'Articles' started by Dan Loney, Feb 28, 2019.

    1. SetPeace

      SetPeace Member+

      Jun 22, 2004
      SC Illinois
      Club:
      Torquay United
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I really do wish MLS would give each club some leeway when it comes to apparel company agreements, instead of just going with one exclusive corporation, in this case, Adidas. Are there other leagues in the world that grant one company exclusivity when it comes to outfitting their teams? You see a wide range of uniforms from various companies in other pro leagues. For the most part, I like some of the stuff Adidas puts out, but as has been said, 'Variety is the spice of life!'.
       
    2. Justin O

      Justin O Member+

      Nov 30, 1998
      Seattle
      Club:
      Seattle

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I'd be OK with a white jersey if it came with Colorado Caribou style fringe.
       
      Beau Dure, AndyMead, Martininho and 2 others repped this.
    3. American Brummie

      Jun 19, 2009
      There Be Dragons Here
      Club:
      Birmingham City FC
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I came here for a serious discussion about which New York team was on which side of the Hudson and did not leave disappointed.
       
    4. kenntomasch

      kenntomasch Member+

      Sep 2, 1999
      Out West
      Club:
      FC Tampa Bay Rowdies
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      The Mutiny had a Rollerball font for their wordmark, but normal numbers.

      You may be thinking of the Bucs' digital clock numbers, which they still wear.
       
    5. kgilbert78

      kgilbert78 Member+

      Borussia Mönchengladbach
      United States
      Dec 28, 2006
      Cowlumbus, OH
      Club:
      Borussia Mönchengladbach
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      Transhudson and cishudson. Love it (especially as I am a chemist)!

      If they did a Columbus throwback, I'm not sure I'd want to see a Columbus Magic style jersey. Light blue and purple was fine for the '80s....

      Now an Atoms throwback?? Yes, please.
       
    6. Dan Loney

      Dan Loney BigSoccer Supporter

      Mar 10, 2000
      Cincilluminati
      Club:
      Los Angeles Sol
      Nat'l Team:
      Philippines

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I sit PARTIALLY corrected. I thought they had this numbering during their greener days. But you're right, their inaugural look had sane numbers, if northing else.
       

      Attached Files:

    7. doleac19

      doleac19 New Member

      Philadelphia Union
      Jun 23, 2009
      Club:
      DC United
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I guess Real Salt Lake and the Union got relegated?

      Couldn't possibly agree any harder on the jersey takes though.
       
      Ismitje and Alejandro 10 repped this.
    8. AlbertCamus

      AlbertCamus Member+

      Colorado Rapids
      Sep 2, 2005
      Colorado, USA
      Club:
      Colorado Rapids

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      As the article stated, I am fine with white if everybody else doesn't do white. Especially white monochrome. Annoyed the RedBulls, who normally wear white, are not white (according to the article).

      Every year I predict the Rapids to win the Shield and Cup. I maintain my dignity by not predicting them to win the Open Cup. I'll go with Cincinnati on that one.
       
      Alejandro 10 repped this.
    9. Brian in Boston

      Brian in Boston Member+

      Jun 17, 2004
      MA, RI and CA

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      With regard to Major League Soccer uniforms...

      The league's most recent contract extension with Adidas brought in $700 million for a 6-year deal. Does anyone believe that MLS would have turned down another offer if a different manufacturer - one, capable of producing goods at least to the same level of quality that Adidas currently provides - was willing to pay them more? Why would the league leave money on the table?

      So, MLS extended its deal with Adidas. For the $700 million that Adidas forked over for the right to be the league's uniform, training gear, sideline apparel, footwear, and match ball partner, they get the right to call the shots when it comes to just how much customization they're willing to offer individual MLS clubs within the kit design process. Period.

      Now, as MLS enthusiasts, I'm sure that we all believe that the league's teams - in particular, whichever side we support - should be granted carte blanche when it comes to dictating to Adidas what aesthetic bells-and-whistles they'd like to see incorporated to their uniforms.

      Here's the thing: Adidas doesn't just leave piles of fabric and thread laying around giant factories situated throughout the world and then wait for magical, kit-making elves to whip-up soccer uniforms overnight. The planning and implementation of the design and manufacturing schedule for all of the soccer-related product that Adidas generates - not just the kits that are being produced specifically for professional teams, but the totality of the soccer line - is mind-numbingly complex. And, again, we're not even taking into account that soccer uniforms and equipment are but a single part of the overall Adidas portfolio.

      As a result, Adidas has to prioritize which of its partners around the GLOBE - individual clubs, complete leagues, and national associations alike - gets what they want with regard to kit customization... and to what extent. I've got news for you, gang: even with the strides that MLS has made over its soon-to-be-24 seasons, the league and its individual clubs are occupying, at best, middle tier status on the Adidas priority list when it comes to uniform customization.

      Why? Because MLS clubs just don't have the sort of global market-share clout that allows them to generate the kind of revenue through merchandise sales that the top-tier clients of Adidas manage to. Real Madrid, Man United, Chelsea, Bayern Munich... these were teams that sold anywhere from 880,000 to nearly 1.5 million jerseys last year. That not only put money in the pockets of the individual clubs, but into the coffers of Adidas, as well. It's worth it for Adidas to go to the trouble of tweaking its production schedule to accommodate the special design requests of clubs such as these because they know that they can recoup the costs in time, aggravation, and - most importantly - money tenfold.

      Trust me, tweaking the manufacturing process in order to produce specific design elements - everything from colors to patterns to certain style collars, etc. - comes at a cost. Therefore, Adidas - or any other manufacturer for that matter - is only going to be willing to undertake such customization for powerhouse brands that they know will move the units of merchandise necessary to cover the extra cost and turn a profit.

      Bottom line? Until MLS clubs can move the number of units necessary to generate the type of revenue that would make it financially worthwhile for Adidas to accommodate more extensive aesthetic customization of uniforms, said teams aren't going to be dictating to Adidas - or, any other top-flight uniform manufacturer for that matter - such customization. To say nothing of the league-wide roll-out of "third jerseys". As far as the uniform manufacturers are concerned, MLS clubs need to do a better job of selling their primary and change jerseys before they start worrying about adding third jerseys back into the mix.
       
      Alejandro 10 and Dan Loney repped this.
    10. Dan Loney

      Dan Loney BigSoccer Supporter

      Mar 10, 2000
      Cincilluminati
      Club:
      Los Angeles Sol
      Nat'l Team:
      Philippines

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      They're in Platform 9 3/4.

      (There they are in the Word version that I copied over. I wonder what the hell mushrooms I was on. Probably breaded.)
       
      Alejandro 10 repped this.
    11. kgilbert78

      kgilbert78 Member+

      Borussia Mönchengladbach
      United States
      Dec 28, 2006
      Cowlumbus, OH
      Club:
      Borussia Mönchengladbach
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      That LAFC shirt looks like it went through a jammed printer....
       
    12. Dan Loney

      Dan Loney BigSoccer Supporter

      Mar 10, 2000
      Cincilluminati
      Club:
      Los Angeles Sol
      Nat'l Team:
      Philippines

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I agree. I deleted a tangent - apparently, the same time as my RSL and Philly picks - nothing personal, guys, I'm not kicking you out of the league - where was I

      One of the problems is that Adidas and Nike tend to err on the side of fewer templates, and it really shows when there's a lot of similar rollouts at once. Their World Cup designs are most notorious for this.

      But most of this is on MLS. If Philly and New England can pull of minor design changes in their whites, and if Colorado can sneak in an invisible state flag - seriously, I like that part - then other teams can ask for similar changes. If that means MLS has to accept less money from Adidas for them to provide individual team numbers, fine. But it shouldn't cost more money for more color variety, because they've got two different shades of white on New England's jersey already. Not to mention the broken printer looks - each subtly and irritatingly different - they gave to RSL and the LA teams.

      You're right about third jerseys, but third jerseys are a sometimes food. There should not be annual rollouts of third jerseys leaguewide - well, ever, really. Rolling out literally a different look every week like U. of Oregon football would be cute, but not very sustainable.
       
      Alejandro 10 repped this.
    13. kenntomasch

      kenntomasch Member+

      Sep 2, 1999
      Out West
      Club:
      FC Tampa Bay Rowdies
      Nat'l Team:
      United States

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I try to forget the Tour de France unis Even though I own one.
       
    14. mschofield

      mschofield Member+

      May 16, 2000
      Berlin
      Club:
      Union Berlin
      Nat'l Team:
      Germany

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      Thrice in their history, SKC has hit it out of the park on primary shirts. The classic rainbow as an homage to being the Wiz at the time. It may have been hideous, but it was fun and funny and iconic. Their first year after the rebrand, then they used the state line that separates Kansas City into Kansas and Missouri as the defining design element. There was a ton of thought put into the shirt, every little bit meant something. And then one of their final shirts before the rebrand was just a beautiful blue job.
      This year it's, apparently, tire treads over the chest, implying road kill. It's not a great idea.
      If we had a nice secondary to fall back on, maybe, but sheesh.
      My point is simple: A club that has nailed it three times, yet fails to keep any of those three shirts in its wardrobe is trying way too hard.
      So yes, I, too, am annoyed at the glut of white shirts. I really enjoy one team in blue, one in red or yellow or orange. Beyond that, I mean, what about the grass stains?
       
      KC96 and Alejandro 10 repped this.
    15. JayRockers!

      JayRockers! Member+

      Aug 4, 2001

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      I’m voting for Sactown!

      Thx,

      Jay!
       
      Honore de Ballsac repped this.
    16. JayRockers!

      JayRockers! Member+

      Aug 4, 2001

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM

      Thx,

      Jay!
       
      Alejandro 10 repped this.
    17. Alejandro 10

      Alejandro 10 Member

      Feb 15, 2001
      Club:
      DC United

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      A know somebody who wouldn't hesitate to inform us all that this blizzard the befalls us is actually a martketing play that reflects the uptick in white supremacy movements in the US over the last decade.

      YMMV
       
    18. Alejandro 10

      Alejandro 10 Member

      Feb 15, 2001
      Club:
      DC United

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      To be clear for those complaining about a lack of long sleeve jerseys and third kits.
       
    19. mbanks

      mbanks Member

      Mar 11, 1999

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      Thought this article was about something else this weekend....
       
      Dan Loney repped this.
    20. Honore de Ballsac

      Oct 28, 2005
      France.

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      That's a whole lotta words and grandstanding for something we all understood just fine intuitively.
       
    21. Brian in Boston

      Brian in Boston Member+

      Jun 17, 2004
      MA, RI and CA

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      No "grandstanding" intended. Just sharing thoughts and an opinion.
       
    22. Honore de Ballsac

      Oct 28, 2005
      France.

      MLS 2019 - Everything's Gonna Be All White

      By Dan Loney on Feb 28, 2019 at 5:07 PM
      Ok sorry to be a jerk.
       

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