6 matches are enough for a good nickname, so let’s get the ball rolling. I suggest “Atomic Bomb Shelter” Klinsi because I get a kick out of how, in so ways, Klinsi is a gross caricature of the criticism “Bunker Bob” received. For example: • Bunker Bob: author of the “empty bucket” formation with two defensive midfielders. • Atomic Bomb Shelter Klinsi: starts no less than four (against Mexico) and consistently three defensive midfielders. • Bunker Bob: accused of favoritism for playing his son, a regular starter in Europe and the Yank with the record for most goals scored in Europe in a single season, every game for ninety minutes. • Atomic Bomb Shelter Klinsi: starts Kyle Beckerman, a solid MLS player but 29 and never with any European interest, every game for 90 minutes. • Bunker Bob: earns a reputation for being stingy with the subs. • Atomic Bomb Shelter Klinsi: forgets to make subs. • Bunker Bob: boringly ground out the 1-0 wins. • Atomic Bomb Shelter Klinsi: Comically grinds out the 0-1 losses. Now, if you have Klinsi’s profile tattooed on your and if you pray to his effigy every night don’t get too excited. Every coach deserves a good nickname and to be made fun of a little; even if he turns out to be not half bad and does something like lead us to first place in our group in a World Cup finals.
"You know, it wasn't pretty. But I was proud of our guys being able to go out there and grind out that 0-1 loss."
I also like how Klinsmann claims he wants to play an "attacking style", yet we put out a lineup with only 3 capable attackers. With Williams on the right side of the field we have virtually given up attacking down that side. Literally every attack comes from the left since we have a d-mid playing on the right wing.
Col-o-nel (3 syllables) Klinsi has a great ring to it. If only we could fuse it with Sergeant "I know nothing" Schultz!
"I pledge allegiance" "I pledge allegiance" "...to Jürgen Klinsmann" "to Jerrgen Klinsmen" "THAT'S JURGEN!" "That's Jurgen!" "...and to the phony reputation" "and to the phony reputation" "...on which he stands!" "on which he stands!
A bunker system that grinds 0-1 losses is a lousy bunker system. An "atomic bomb shelter" is supposed to be even better than a bunker.
Juergomaniac? The Klepto Kaiser? The Deutche Douchebag? The Footie Messiah Soccer Jesus God? Throw 'em up against the wall, folks. Something has to stick.
My english friend told me that Americans are extremely stupid that we want Jurgen as coach a few months ago and I brushed it off. I too was on the Jurgen train. I thought that Bob was a decent coach and USA would probably be a top 30 team under Bob, but I thought we reached our max under him. So when Jurgen was appointed I was pretty happy because I thought he'd be the man to take us to the next level but Jurgen quickly changed my opinion. My english friend pointed out that Germany actually got better one Jurgen left and we can make any excuse we want, but Jurgen didn't do well at Bayern Munich. Now for America, Jurgen is 1-6-1 with 2 goals for and Jurgen's lasting impact could be us losing Gonzalez and John to other nations because Jurgen refuses to even call them up despite their dominance this year. Instead guys like Fiscal and Ream continue to get chances they don't deserve. I think if we lose to Slovenia or again make very few chances on goal, Jurgen should be fired. We don't want to get into a position in qualifying where we need a new coach because Jurgen isn't doing the job and we are struggling.
For those who may not know: Colonel Klink: [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZStaaVuxsgg"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZStaaVuxsgg[/ame] Sergeant Shultz: [ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34ag4nkSh7Q"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34ag4nkSh7Q[/ame]