Tragedy in Thailand

Discussion in 'Columbus Crew SC' started by Zak, Oct 16, 2003.

  1. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    Just gotten a bit of bad news...The new Columbus Crew Superstore that was opened last week in Bangkok, has just been the site of a riot. As we all know Crew jersey's went at record pace during the grand opening last Monday, well the new shipment arrived this morning, and as we all expected, a riot commencenced as demand far exceeded supply. Club Shoppe manager Shin Jin Sho had this to say, "I begged General Manager Smith to send me four thousand of the yellow kits, unfortunately, Adidias just couldn't produce that many jerseys within a span of a week and a half. I suppose that this is to be expected as Crew are the most massive club in the world, the people here can't wait until next spring's world tour." This news comes along with news that is a bit less sad, Crew jerseys in Thailand are going 3 to 1 compared to Manchester United, and 4 to 1 compared to Real Madrid. This has caused most experts to feel that Mark Williams is the next David Beckham. Williams had this to say, "we very much love our fans around the world, our team is very sad that a riot occured over the opportunity to purchase one of our shirts."
     
  2. Bill Archer

    Bill Archer BigSoccer Supporter

    Mar 19, 2002
    Washington, NC
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    What a ridiculous story. An absolute lie.

    "Couldn't get adidas to make more" my foot. All he had to do was hop on eBay and get ]Coolmiki[/url] or one of his pals, who are conveniently right there in Bangkok, to send him over a few cases of shirts.

    I mean, so what if they're made in a basement or a garage by b-girls on break? They look just like the real thing.

    And miki offers shirts from ALL the massive clubs. Boca. real. Crew.

    So I'm guessing that little sneak Sho Jin Whats-his-face has stolen the damned things and is peddling them off the back of a Toyota pickup out in front of some smut palace.

    Course I could be worng.
     
  3. hangthadj

    hangthadj Member+

    A.S. Roma
    Mar 27, 2001
    Beacon, NY
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    You can tell this has really hit Williams hard. He is trying to distance himself from the situation big time. He hasn't even updated his website...

    http://www.icons.com/williams/

    We can only hope that this doesn't affect his play this weekend. He has brought leadership, grit, determenation and a whole new fanbase to our club. Could you imagine poor Wan-Fen's tears if she isn't able to see the Crew in the playoffs on FSW International.
     
  4. Eggy

    Eggy New Member

    May 28, 1999
    CBUS
    In other news the japanese have made a statue out of jello honoring their hero Brian McBride.

    Leader of the project, student Natagoshi Suki, 21 said "We wanted to do Edson Budd..Buddre..but we can't get his name right.
     
  5. law5guy

    law5guy Member

    Jun 26, 2001
    lol..

    Too bad you couldn't come up with some Thai sounding names... The names you chose sound more Korean and Japanese.
     
  6. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    I didn't think it was appropriate at the time, but given the brevity of this situation, there was an increase of suicide in Thailand last Friday night, young teenage girls were smashed to bits that Mark Williams' suspension had to be served and they couldn't see their hero play. Those yellows, harshly given in my opinion, cost lives at the end of the day, MLS referees must be more responsible.
     
  7. Bill Archer

    Bill Archer BigSoccer Supporter

    Mar 19, 2002
    Washington, NC
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Or maybe just a ghei name like yours?



    Anyways, Williams has bigger problems; Leilani, trying to make a mark in the US, has been reduced to appearing in cheap Rock Station tittie shows:

    http://kisw.com/kisw_rockgirls.htm

    Where she'll probably end up fielding sleazy, sophomoric double entendres from some "Wacky, zany Morning drive team"

    Somehow, I'm betting she was hoping for better things than sitting around wearing a bikini at 6:30 am being leered at and drooled over by a couple of radio geeks.

    I'm guessing Kieron Dyer is looking pretty good right now.
     
  8. Flyer Fan

    Flyer Fan Member+

    Apr 18, 1999
    Columbus, OH
    I just assumed that this thread would involve prostitutes.
     
  9. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    I've just recieved word that Tom Presthus has caught a direct flight from Port Columbus, to Thailand Int'l Airport. Crew are hoping that he can squash any further violence. Greg Andrulis, our coach, is very worried that this will weaken the squad ahead of the titanic tie up between United and Crew.
     
  10. Eggy

    Eggy New Member

    May 28, 1999
    CBUS
    Breaking News: CREW TV coming to your..erm..TV

    That's right the Crew will have their own TV channel where you will 24 hours of

    -Andrulis quotes the obvious

    -Jim Smith on how he still believes we can we the MLS Cup

    - Chris Bailey's friend's on whose smoking pot this week.

    -The ever popular talk show "First Impressions" with Mark Williams* (This show won't be airing for another 3 months if that as he's still working out contract details)

    -The retarded North End guy on why it's bad to stand on the benches


    Subscribe now and get a free 2003 Open Cup Champions t-shirt taht would otherwise be used to polish Jeff Cunningham Hyundai
     
  11. Kryptonite

    Kryptonite Fancy Title Here

    Apr 10, 1999
    Columbus
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    hahahahahahahahaha

    Seriously, why does 137 have to get stuck with the retard ushers. and the supervisor is just as bad.


    -CrewTV also has segments about the stupid horns that incessantly blare nonstop, a segment about playing stupid music on the PA system during the run of play. After that program is over, there's a segment about the announcer being anything but in cue to the music as he speaks on the microphone.

    -Also, check out the new segment on Wednesdays at 7:30 PM about Jim Smith explaining why a massive club such as Columbus has no TV deal in Columbus.

    -Fridays at 5:30 PM, check listings as we see which of the opposition plan on cheating in that saturday's game.





    But every other hour, is highlights from Columbus, it's youth teams and drinking songs from the supporter's end.
     
  12. myshap

    myshap Member

    Jun 19, 2002
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    You guys are forgeting the biggest show on the network.

    "Soccer Techniques with the Crew" at 8pm EST

    --See Field Goal drills with Brian McBride
    --See how to take on five defenders...and lose the ball with Cunningham
    --See exactly how the Crew's complicated defensive scheme, that is great for those 80', games, is constructed.
    ---Plus special features like a tour of the Soccer Gods crib with Greg Andrulis as guide and Mais' top secret fault of ankle tendens that keeps him fresh and fit for the season.
     
  13. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    Does anyone know what time Crew TV turns a bit more adult? I wanted to see the "Crewzer's on Holiday" programme.
     
  14. hangthadj

    hangthadj Member+

    A.S. Roma
    Mar 27, 2001
    Beacon, NY
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Well sorta like MTV's real life series they will have I wanna be a Crewzer. Episode One is Williams page three girl trying out, I doubt we'll see anything hardcore, but it could still be interesting.

    Also for the ladies their is the big hit,
    Cunny's Rehab (or how I learned to stop worrying and love the Carlisle Club)
     
  15. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    Crew TV 10pm tonight, "Cunny Undercover"

    Tonight Jeff "Cunty" Cunningham dances the night away while drinking redbull and vodka, and we know what drinking leads to when you're Cunty, Mayhem! See how many overweight white women Cunty can bag in this hour long programme sure to make you feel great about your love life despite not having the "I'm a proffessional footballer" line to use.

    Crew TV 11pm tonight, "Made"

    Westerville South flag corp member Sally Ridem wants to go from lozer to Crewzer. But can this portly beauty survive the tortuous training that goes into being part of America's hardest working dance team? Or will she run off to the local Dairy Queen and make out like JD at an all you can eat meat pie buffet? Guest Star Jim from the hit TV show "Camp Jim" tries to get Sally ready, but will she make it? Rivetting drama at it's finest!
     
  16. Kryptonite

    Kryptonite Fancy Title Here

    Apr 10, 1999
    Columbus
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Early rumors have it starting at 11:30 PM weeknights (sunday night - thursday night) and 12:30 AM weekends (friday night & saturday night). And Crew management wants to stress that this is EARLY RUMORS and anything can still happen.

    There is also talk of a potential "CrewTV Adult" channel broadcasting 24 hours a day, based upon popularity of CrewTV. This would probably be in block format, similar to other adult channels.
     
  17. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    I can't wait to see Kieron Dyer banging the stuffing out of Leliani. But can kieron really fill up a whole six hour block? That would take a massive amount of stamina, or, rather a massive amount of information about tantric sex.
     
  18. HuntKop

    HuntKop Moderator
    Staff Member

    Sep 15, 2002
    Sulla mia Vespa
    Club:
    ACF Fiorentina
    Nat'l Team:
    Italy
    Word from the administration is that the "retard" ushers and supervisor were placed in the north end to facilitate discussion among like-minded individuals. That is, they thought that the usher should be of a similar intellect as the fans in that area!

    It could be a vicious rumor, however.
     
  19. Raoul

    Raoul New Member

    Sep 19, 1999
    Downtown Dublin
    THis has to go in the best quotes from Eggy book.

    It's pronounced Buddruul in Japan and Written #+*/!.
     
  20. Eggy

    Eggy New Member

    May 28, 1999
    CBUS

    That just wasn't funny.




    At all.
     
  21. HuntKop

    HuntKop Moderator
    Staff Member

    Sep 15, 2002
    Sulla mia Vespa
    Club:
    ACF Fiorentina
    Nat'l Team:
    Italy
    It wasn't supposed to be funny. I was trying to stay with the mean-spirit of the original post.
     
  22. Eggy

    Eggy New Member

    May 28, 1999
    CBUS
    Yeah right. Bob Saget thinks he's funny too. Guess what. You're not funny.


    Now have a bowl of STFU and go back to whatever board you came from cause this is the nasty Crew supporters board who doesn't give a sh1t what you think of the North End or anything else.

    Ya fookin retard.
     
  23. Sneever Flion

    Sneever Flion New Member

    Oct 29, 2002
    Detroit, MI
    I knew I should have drank before I clicked on this thread.

    I think you guys are forgetting the Special Feature program on Crew TV Adult where the Crewzers get off on the "Rock".
     
  24. Zak

    Zak Member

    Feb 18, 2002
    Massive Club
    8pm: "Grumpy Old Men"
    What happens when Crew defender Mike Clark doesn't recieve his golden buckeye card discount at the local MCL? Mayhem of course! Can Mike's life long friend Brian Maisonneuve step in and get things back on course? Only time will tell...Guest star Alex Pineda Chicon as the waiter that doesn't speak english.

    8:30pm: "Why Me"
    Brian Mcbride and Frankie Hejduk star in this hilarious comedy where everyone seems to be losing the plot. This episode our two stars find out that they will be going through a rebuilding year next year, slapstick comedy sure to leave at least one of our stars hurting is sure to ensue.

    9pm: "I Don't Get It"
    Crew TV's version of the weakest link, tonight the contestants are Nelson Akwari, Diego Walsh, Freddy Garcia, and Chad McCarty. See each contestant stumble as they are asked the trick question, "why aren't you in the starting line up?"

    9:30 pm: "Extreme Makeover"
    Crew's version of David Beckham, Mark Williams, trolls around Columbus looking for mingers. But with five thousand dollars in hand and a Page 3 bird in tow, Mark makes a young ladies dream come true. See this homely looking castaway, become a fashionista in less than thirty minutes, stunning! Guest Star, Kieron Dyer.
     
  25. Kryptonite

    Kryptonite Fancy Title Here

    Apr 10, 1999
    Columbus
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    New Programme:

    Eggy's Fight of the Day - See which member of the opposing supporter's club Eggy gets in a fight with. Is it Chicago? A*bion? DC United? Don Garber? Some twat who supports Mexican teams and MLS teams? Someone who thinks Chivas is a good idea?

    Blood and mayhem will result! Ambulances will not be standing by in this winner-take-all match.

    As an added bonus, both fighters will be fully drunk before they step into the ring.
     

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