I know we aren't supposed to, but I don't consider it sinning. If you can give it back to them without affecting your game, go for it. At least some of the time, they are shocked to be hit back at. And if you can get other fans laughing at them, then maybe they will shut for a bit. I was working in our local Hispanic league and getting all kinds of bilingual crap from the sidelines and given that I don't hear good, or know much Spanish, it really sucked. A player, already on a YC, did a hard foul and that just pisses me off. Not enough to get the 2nd YC, but I needed to let him know how not cool that was and that he was really pushing it. While I'm trying to get that point across, a sorta assistant coach is yapping at me non-stop loudly and in Spanish about who knows what. Finally I had enough and turned to him and gave him a RC. Now he's saying (in English) what did I do? And player on field says "do you even know what he said?" I turned back to him and say, "no, what did he say?". He was now kinda stuck because apparently, he did not want to repeat it. As the assignor for this league (this was on Fathers Day and no one wanted to work, which is why I was out there in the first place), I had talk with league organizer about teams needing to show more respect to refs. And by and large, this season, they have. The asshole quotient is much lower than before. But there's always 1 or 2 who didn't get the memo.......
I expected worse than this. This is nothing. I expected something like "yeah I do, I don't only drink soda and beer like you clearly do" or "yeah thirst accompanies physical activity, something your stomach shows you clearly know nothing about"
While I'm always hesitant to call advantage in a U10 rec game, I did so yesterday and it led to an interesting and educational set of exchanges. Black vs Pink. Black attacker is fouled at the top of the penalty arc just as she passes to a player who scores on a nice one on one finish. Of course, as someone who normally does higher level games most of the time, I call out "Play on!" with a two-armed advantage signal. So I'm feeling pretty good - an advantage led to a goal. Of course, that was probably the first time any of these players and parents have seen an advantage called, let alone one that led right to a goal. After the ball goes in the goal, the player who was fouled is looking at me with that look you know a nine-year-old can give when said nine-year-old hasn't received what she (or he - I know my two kids had that look at that age) wanted. Since I was over near the parents' sideline with the player, I spoke loudly enough so the parents could hear: "I saw you get fouled, but your teammate got the ball and scored, so I decided to not call the foul so your team could score." (That was about the best way I could try to explain to a nine-year-old what advantage really means.) One of the moms on the sideline then asks, "So does the goal count?" I could tell it was an honest question and we had no issues with parents or coaches, so I decided to answer. "Yes, the goal does count. I can decide to let play go on if I feel the team has a better chance to score than if I call the foul. When I said "Play on", that means I saw the foul but think you'll get a better chance to score without the foul." She thought for a moment and said, "Makes sense." Black's coach also told me he explained things to the fouled player and she was actually kind of proud that her pass led to a goal even when she was fouled. Maybe in a few years, that player will remember that play and decide to become a referee.
Good for you ... I had a similar situation a few years ago (U12) where the kid who got fouled & the kid's parents would NOT stop whining. I remember "do you want me to not count the goal?" coming out of my mouth. There was nothing I could say or do to make them happy (or at least get them to move on). Started in patient explaining mode, then slightly irritated but hanging in there mode, to seriously annoyed to tossing the parents and RC for the kid. In a game they were winning 7-0 at the time. Parents went to tourney HQ after the match to file a complaint. Tourney director waited for them to fill out a form, gave it a quick once-over, and crumpled it up right in front of them. Sigh.
In a twisted way, this is fantastic. Those parents and that player should have been required to take a referee certification course on the spot.
I had a similar situation when I was coaching U14. Clear and awful foul, but ball goes to another girl on my team to breakaway against the GK. Alas, she shanked the shot, so we didn’t score. The fouled girl’s dad was beside himself, no matter what I explained. The youth ref had made an excellent advantage call, complete with a text book signal and call. (I did think it was a reckless foul and he should have gone back to give the caution, which he didn’t. That might have calmed the dad, too.)
In the lacrosse tournament I did this past weekend, two sudden death overtime playoff games had the referee completely misapply the rules to take a goal off the board, and in both games, the team that didn't score first ended up winning. One was a referee misapplying an indirect shot foul on the winning goal. When he explained it (incorrectly) to the coach, she said "oh, that's what I thought" so he got completely off the hook. In the second, the referee had played advantage for the attack, but then after they scored, for a reason his partner couldn't understand, he blew the whistle and brought the ball back to the spot of the foul. The funniest thing about this was that the coaching staff of the team who had the goal scored against them were going ape at the referee for "what the hell call is that ref!?!?", not realizing he just pulled their losing goal out of the goal. They ended up winning. I figured it's worth posting here because this is something I doubt we will ever see in soccer given how relatively simple to rules are and clear to see if you misapply them. The rules for girls lacrosse are so numerous and asinine that definitely parents and sometimes even coaches don't know the rules so you can get away with so much BSing.
I had a situation this spring that didn't escalate anywhere near that level, but it was a medium-high level U-14 game in which you'd think the coach would get it. Team A is advancing with the ball. Near midfield, a player is fouled, but the team maintains a promising attack, and the center very nicely lets play continue. They advance the ball another 30-40 yards, and then Team B fouls again. Whistle, free kick in a dangerous area. Team A's coach isn't happy: "But what about the FIRST foul!" (No, I don't think he was arguing for a yellow card -- there was nothing in it.) I wish the center had asked him if he would prefer to have his team take the free kick 30 yards back.
It seems like this happens once every two years or so for me. In a college search game a few years ago, I delay the whistle on a takedown happen in the area and the ball goes to a player who scores. The fouled player starts arguing with me. The question was short and sweet - "Would you like me to take the goal off the board?" Player looks at the ball in the net. "Sorry, sir. Thank you." Got a nice score on my assessment for that one as well.
A new adult referee (not quite referee, still has to have the new class) just called me complaining about SafeSport. "Why do we have to do this? This is geared more toward coaches" Me: "Because it is required. If you want to be a referee, you must do this." "Can't you explain it to them that this doesn't pertain to referees?" Me: "No. It is required. If you want to be a referee, you must do this." "Well, when I go to Montgomery for the class, I will explain to them why we shouldn't have to do SafeSport." Me, internally: "Good luck with that." *sigh*
I'm reffing a summer boys HS game. These games typically are solo ref, but my local club knows that having ARs makes for a better game and is willing to pay ($35) to (usually) younger (pre-HS) refs. They FINALLY cut the grass, but did not line the field, so the lines are just about invisible. But again, the home club is proactive and put about 100 flat cones all around the field and at the top corners of the box. All the other games in this league are solo ref. So the kids are not used to having ARs making the throwin and offside calls. So we are playing a nice close 0-0 match and the center middie for the visitors is making calls. "That's out". "That's offside", "That's gotta be out". He was probably used to trying to influence the solo centers, but seemed to forget that I got some good ARs working. And with the cones, it is real easy to see that the ball is or is not out. And he's roughly in the middle of the field, totally not in a good position to see any of this stuff. Now, he was not really talking to me, or at least he was not looking at me, and he did not dispute any of the calls beyond the first comment. Finally, late in the 2nd half, after about the 10th occurrence, I said, "hey #3, are you a ref?" He was really startled that I was talking to him and started sputtering something about "no, but I got eyes...". And then he took off running really hard for the next few minutes.....
No. The new grassroots referee class requires an in-person class. Everything else, including SafeSport is online.
Doing a girls summer HS game today - dual ref system. Black is far superior team as Red as only 11 players and obviously a bunch of 9/10 graders. But Red has a good GK and decent sweeper and sort of able to keep the game close (final score 3-1). That, and Black was called for offside at least 15 times. Late in the game, about 13 offside calls in, black wing is on my side and 10 feet offside and calling out "here, here, here.....................oooh never mind, I'm offside". I had to laugh and she gives me a sheepish grin and says "well I was".
Existential crisis today on an intra-club scrimmage U17B v U19B. I had to give one of the players a red card for DOGSO and the coaches told me "it's fine ref he can stay on and we will still play 11v11"
Coaches in a scrimmage just want you keeping them safe and calling fouls and offsides, up to them on the rest.
Any scrimmage I do, I always make sure I know what everyone wants and expects before I blow a whistle. That includes showing cards. At least half the time I don’t even carry them.
Same. I had a prep school preseason scrimmage last fall where the coaches just straight up told us “don’t show cards, if a player is being an issue, just come to us and let us know and we’ll take care of it.” Gave a clear DOGSO holding penalty and explained to the player that in a real game, he’d be sent off.
Sometimes in a scrimmage, I will even address the teams and remind them that it is a scrimmage. I’ll say something like “Remember, this is a scrimmage and we don’t want to do anything that will get someone hurt. We don’t want anyone to miss games because of what happens here!”
I was the 4th on a game about a month ago where one club's head coach was a former college head coach (and a problem to handle in the NCAA). He started griping more and more as the match progressed towards the 90th minute and his team was down one goal. Me: "Coach, you're crossing the line now with your comments and arm gestures. This is your formal warning." Him: "Formal warning? Warning? What does that even mean?" Me: "You're close to earning a caution. You've been warned." Him: "Since when is a warning a thing? This is ridiculous!" Seems like he hasn't read Law 12 in quite some time.....
I'm guessing you can replace the bolded part with "ever read the Laws", and we are probably closer to reality.