The "Let's All Laugh at aust!n" Thread

I’m good with this thread.
I HATE PSV and I HATE AUSTIN. Why you ask? Because you threatened to steal my family. You ******** with my family and I ******** with you. Good luck.

 

Subscribed

 

Whatcha guys doing in here?

 

I lol'd

 

Seconded.

scha·den·freu·de
/ˈSHädənˌfroidə/
noun

1. pleasure derived by someone from another person's misfortune.
   "a business that thrives on schadenfreude"

 

Hoping that Precourt fails is the last thing on my wish list. I know I can never forgive and I'm finding it hard to forget. I'd like to. I thought if we won (which we did, and I couldn't be happier) that Precourt at worst would walk away doubling his money. If that clown got to walk away richer after trampling on my team and community for 5 years, i'd have been pissed. I also would have gotten over it.

But he didn't walk away. He's still part of the league in which my team plays. He'll be at the drafts, he'll be on ML Soccer Soccer Dot Com! his logo will be there. So, I'm all in on hoping he fails. I feel a touch bad for the city of Austin that I feel this way, but you can only be slapped around so many times before you start to think revenge is good idea. We can actively root for his failure and I look forward to it.

I suppose we also have to be prepared that things will work out great for him down there. His track record doesn't make me have much confidence, but blind squirrels and all that nonsense.

Orlando City is my biggest hope that Precourt fails. I'd love to hear Garber and Phil Rawlins discuss Austin/Orlando with some truth serum coursing through them. Rawlins owned the Aztex and had the desire to move to MLS. He couldn't see a route for that to happen in Austin. He moved the team to Orlando and 4 years later they played in MLS.

Austin had an "ambitious" owner that obviously had the talent and connections to get an MLS team off the ground. Similar to our Dr. Pete and Ms. Dee relationship, Phil has a large money man in Flauvio da Silva. I don't know if that was missing in Austin for him. But he left town and created the whole thing in a few years in Orlando.

So, that makes me hopeful that Precourt will have those bucked teeth curb stomped (metaphorically unless @jack sticker get's a helicopter ride to Texas (or more likely SF)) down in Austin for his ambitious plan being run by incompetents, lackeys and clowns. A talented guy couldn't do it, so I'm thinking these guys have no chance.

Austin as a market seems strange too. Hot as balls for 4 months of the season. Two other so-so markets in Texas already in enormous cities that no one would hang up as the poster for MLS 3.0 success. You'd be hard pressed to find a city without an MLS team that offers more competition for entertainment dollars than Austin. Not to mention its eerie similarity to Columbus.

If he'd wanted to move to St. Louis or Sacramento or New Orleans or Vegas I would have gotten it a little more.

Anyway, that's all to say that I am actively hoping for him to fall on his stupid, dumb face. That after a sold out stadium opening full of promise and excitement that he finds out that Austin just isn't that into him. That his team always has 5 guys with pulled hamstrings and that his customers have to wait 2 hours for a shuttle or an Uber to get home after a game and so they never return.

In the great words of our moderator overlord @Kyle Crew: Get Fukt Anthony!

 

Ca we get SportBilly to ban this bro for trolling?

 

They cited problems with the market as one of the reasons they wanted out. Challenges. Well that was all debunked in a matter of months. So if that's not the reason, then it must have been the internal staff, right? Many of whom just bailed for Texas. I guess they are thinking things are sooo ripe for the picking in Austin that anyone can tap into it like shooting fish in a barrel?

Also, Andy is quoted saying that Austin isn't an expansion franchise. So no draft, special Garber bucks, et al for them, right?

 

No, they fixed this. They're gonna start games at 8 instead of 735.

 

Actually, we should leave this guy in here. It's the only place I am allowed to ask the morons questions

 

I have no issues with Austin getting a team.

I do have issues with their owner circumventing the process and trying, and failing, to move my team.

I also have issues with the astroturf support, the obviously staged PR firm posts on twitter, the complete inability of any of the Austin "fans" to have an honest discussion about the ability of their inept owner to tell the truth about anything ever, and their owner's complete lack of any type of credential to run a team.

Their owner has no business background, has a track record of failure, has no job experience other than low-level account management in a few banking firms (which is interesting considering he holds no securities licenses).

The only thing he has is a rich father. That's it.

If any of the Austin people that still peruse the Crew boards would like to discuss why they think he will be able to build anything other than discontent, I am willing to have that discussion.

Other than that, I will enjoy watching the slow-motion car wreck from my season standing spot in the Nordecke, and I will continue to call out the idiocy of the PR-generated support on whatever medium I see it.

 

Billgeuse...Billygeuse...Billg....

 

Plus, we shouldn't aspire to be so precious, should we?

 

Just thinking about how funny it is that Austin has to wait TWO YEARS to start playing. That’s right, not this season and not even next season, it’s the one after that! That’s a long time to wait and and keep people interested. Maybe you all can pass the time by doing body shots of queso off fat Tony?

 

Crew hosts 2 Wednesday night games this year. The league has tightened the schedule which requires more Wednesday games. I’ve heard Austin claim multiple times “only Saturday night games”. I don’t see how they pull that off.

 

I'd not heard that. It won't be possible, of course. I do recall that they can't use the light rail system on Sundays.

 

You are correct. According to their schedule line, it does not run on Sundays. Maybe they'll open it up for Sunday service before the team finally kicks off summer of 2021. Maybe.

Meanwhile, there are 5 Non-Saturday games out of 17 on the schedule this year. Of the remaining 12 Saturday games, 25% start at 5 or earlier. But hey, it's a second downtown, right? Surely Lime and Bird Scooters will be sufficiently available to get people where they need to be in time and Ma and Pa Public won't mind when they try to go to the Domain and can't find a parking spot.

#CivicPride

 

It's been pointed out elsewhere, but the Sunday restriction on the Austin Metro is a pretty hard one: it's due to right-of-way sharing with freight, and freight gets priority (perhaps exclusively so) on Sunday explicitly.

 

I heard it's because Chik-fil-A owns Austin Metro

 

Pretty soon, there will be enough "this city is required to play/not play" clauses that the rest of the league will all have weeknight games.

 

How awesome would it be if they hired Lalas to head up their soccer operations side of their house!!!!!!!????!!!!!!!