The "Jesus Candidate" Summit.

Discussion in 'Elections' started by Dr. Wankler, Jan 13, 2012.

  1. Dr. Wankler

    Dr. Wankler Member+

    May 2, 2001
    The Electric City
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    I hate to start a new thread on this, but evangelical leaders are meeting in Texas today to see if they can get behind one anti-Romeny candidate. NPR had a good story on the meeting his morning.

    http://www.npr.org/2012/01/13/145121706/evangelical-leaders-struggle-to-crown-a-candidate

    This guy nearly made my wife spit out her oatmeal this morning:

    It probably won't be that bad, says Richard Land of the Southern Baptist Convention. Polls suggest that given the choice between Romney and President Obama in a general election contest, 9 out of 10 evangelicals would vote for Romney.

    And yet, Land says: "Before we marry the guy next door, don't you think we ought to have a fling with a tall dark stranger and see if he can support us in the manner to which we'd like to be accustomed? And if he can't, we can always marry the steady beau who lives next door."​



    Ummm. okay.

    Hey, is that Larry Craig tapping his foot at the next urinal?

    Oh, and Ted Haggard in on line one. And line two. And line three.
     
  2. Claymore

    Claymore Member

    Jul 9, 2000
    Montgomery Vlg, MD
    Club:
    DC United
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Doctor Freud, calling Dr. Sigmund Freud...
     
  3. CHICO13

    CHICO13 Moderator
    Staff Member

    Oct 4, 2001
    SECTION 135
    Club:
    The Strongest La Paz
    Nat'l Team:
    Bolivia
    I'm sure Jesus is not amused. What a bunch of insane clowns.
     
  4. That Phat Hat

    That Phat Hat Member+

    Nov 14, 2002
    Just Barely Outside the Beltway
    Club:
    Liverpool FC
    Nat'l Team:
    Japan
    Jesus doesn't care who wins elections.

    He's more concerned about whether the Broncos beat the spread.
     
  5. CHICO13

    CHICO13 Moderator
    Staff Member

    Oct 4, 2001
    SECTION 135
    Club:
    The Strongest La Paz
    Nat'l Team:
    Bolivia
    He may not care about who wins elections but I'm sure cares about people trashing other people using his good name.

    And he knows the Broncos won't cover.
     
  6. tomwilhelm

    tomwilhelm Member+

    Dec 14, 2005
    Boston, MA, USA
    Club:
    Fulham FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Just so long as they don't form a posse, I guess...
     
  7. Matt in the Hat

    Matt in the Hat Moderator
    Staff Member

    Sep 21, 2002
    Brooklyn
    Club:
    New York Red Bulls
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Ron Paul is a juggalo.
     
  8. TeamUSA

    TeamUSA Member

    Nov 24, 1999
    Tianjin, China
    Club:
    Borussia Mönchengladbach
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    They must be afraid of making the trek to Kolob.
     
  9. Ismitje

    Ismitje Super Moderator

    Dec 30, 2000
    The Palouse
    Club:
    Real Salt Lake
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    That example really had me scratching my head this morning. An Evangelical leader using a metaphor of a romantic or sexual fling with another man to describe the reason they're meeting was quite odd.
     
  10. Dr. Wankler

    Dr. Wankler Member+

    May 2, 2001
    The Electric City
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    You really need to hear it to get the full effect. Like I said, it really woke my wife and me up yesterday morning when we heard it at 6:15 a.m.
     
  11. argentine soccer fan

    Staff Member

    Jan 18, 2001
    San Francisco Bay Area
    Club:
    CA Boca Juniors
    Nat'l Team:
    Argentina
    If they want a Jesus candidate they should talk to Tim Tebow.
     
  12. Dr. Wankler

    Dr. Wankler Member+

    May 2, 2001
    The Electric City
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    I'm sure some strategist or two has already plotted Tebow's political future. Whether said strategist has actually consulted Tebow... well, I doubt it.
     
  13. bigredfutbol

    bigredfutbol Moderator
    Staff Member

    Sep 5, 2000
    Woodbridge, VA
    Club:
    DC United
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    So they settled on Santorum

    Perry REALLY screwed up. I mean, we already knew that, but boy...this should've been him.
     
  14. ceezmad

    ceezmad Member+

    Mar 4, 2010
    Chicago
    Club:
    Chicago Red Stars
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    So who did Jesus pick? :p
     
  15. Matt in the Hat

    Matt in the Hat Moderator
    Staff Member

    Sep 21, 2002
    Brooklyn
    Club:
    New York Red Bulls
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    New England
     
  16. Funkfoot

    Funkfoot Member+

    May 18, 2002
    New Orleans, LA
    :confused: I thought this thread was going to be about Hispanic voters.
     
  17. Tom_Heywood

    Tom_Heywood New Member

    Jan 7, 2012
    Club:
    Blackburn Rovers FC
    Nat'l Team:
    Wales
    They're the wrong kind of Christian for a start, and I'm sure quite a few who did go to this meeting probably would prefer there to be fewer hispanics.

    Maybe one hopeful could change his name to Jesus Candidate next time, and try to appeal to all the religious types.
     
  18. superdave

    superdave Member+

    Jul 14, 1999
    VB, VA
    Club:
    DC United
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    OK, let me explain the joke.

    The Spanish version of Jesse is Jesus, pronounced Hey Zeus. It is a fairly common name among Latin Americans.
     
  19. The Devil's Architect

    Feb 10, 2000
    The American Steppe
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Dave, you're talkin' to a limey twat. He'll catch on sometime after the election.
     
  20. argentine soccer fan

    Staff Member

    Jan 18, 2001
    San Francisco Bay Area
    Club:
    CA Boca Juniors
    Nat'l Team:
    Argentina
    And furthermore, the real Jesus only speaks Spanish. Obvious, since he speaks Spanish in the Reina-Valera Bible, which is the true original version inspired by God.
     
  21. Funkfoot

    Funkfoot Member+

    May 18, 2002
    New Orleans, LA
    Yep, my jokes are always funnier once they're explained!
     
  22. Tom_Heywood

    Tom_Heywood New Member

    Jan 7, 2012
    Club:
    Blackburn Rovers FC
    Nat'l Team:
    Wales
    I was trying to work a joke, but it was half arsed, and it didn't work. Oh and Mr. Warmth, you must feel so big insulting someone thousands of miles away. Anyway, US politics is a joke in itself which is alarming as our politicians try to copy your techniques, but without the stupid bible bashing nonsense thankfully.
     
  23. ceezmad

    ceezmad Member+

    Mar 4, 2010
    Chicago
    Club:
    Chicago Red Stars
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Well only if you are a fundamentalist.

    http://www.ask.com/wiki/Reina-Valera

    "However, the 1960 revision became the common Bible of many millions of Spanish-speaking Christians around the world, surpassing the 1909 in its reception. Almost all Hispanic Fundamentalists use it, despite further attempts to revise it."

    A way to go around the black-out :p

    http://www.ask.com/wiki/Bible_translations_into_Spanish

    "The most widely accepted Catholic Bible is the "Biblia de Jerusalén". Its first Spanish translation was published in 1967 and was revised in 1973. It is also available in a modern Latin American version, and comes with full introductory texts and comments."

    Since most Latinos are RC I guess that the gods Spanish book must be this version ;)

    Then again to me all versions make equally good rolling papers :eek: (jk).
     

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