Nowak Coming out of Retirement

Discussion in 'Chicago Fire' started by Jayson Blair, May 16, 2003.

  1. Jayson Blair

    Jayson Blair New Member

    May 16, 2003
    Downtown Baghdad
    As he drew one final sip from a glass of chilled Vodka, Piotr Nowak began to weep. "You are the only person I am telling this to," he said in Polish. "But I am going to come out of retirement and lead the Chicago Fire to the championship."

    Not one to take his words at face value, I caught a plane to Warsaw, where I met with his father, Pawel. "Is this true?" I asked.

    At this moment, the father pulled a smoke from a fresh pack of Marlboro Lights, wiped a tear from his eye an began to tell me the most amazing story I've ever heard...

    More later, I just got a lead on the Jon Benet story.

    Reporting from Baghdad, I'm Jayson Blair.
     
  2. YanksFC

    YanksFC Member

    Feb 3, 2000
    Indianapolis
    Club:
    Liverpool FC
    That has to be one of the most feeble attempts at humor I've ever seen.
     
  3. angus_hooligan

    angus_hooligan New Member

    May 15, 2001
    Chicago
    Yeah, that was pretty bad.
     
  4. Matrim55

    Matrim55 Member+

    Aug 14, 2000
    Berkeley
    Club:
    Connecticut
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    That's one of the goddamn funniest things I've ever read.
     
  5. joseph pakovits

    joseph pakovits New Member

    Apr 29, 1999
    fly-over country
    Ah, so that was you laughing hysterically at the end of "Old Yeller".
     
    Jiggly_333 repped this.
  6. HalaMadrid

    HalaMadrid Member

    Apr 9, 1999
    Let's just say I've come to expect better from the person responsible for this.
     
  7. GoFireGo

    GoFireGo New Member

    Apr 25, 2002
    Chicago
  8. angus_hooligan

    angus_hooligan New Member

    May 15, 2001
    Chicago
    I don't mind ripping on another team and usually find things like that humourus even when it's directed at me. This one just had a lack of humor.
     
  9. Jayson Blair

    Jayson Blair New Member

    May 16, 2003
    Downtown Baghdad
    As long as your feelings are true, I have no problems. As a reporter and writer, I know that without the truth we have nothing. This is my only mission in life, to seek the absolute truth at all times. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to hop on Air Force I for a one-on-one with the President.

    Until Next time,

    I'm Jayson Blair
     
  10. FairWeatherFan

    Sep 9, 2002
    Chicago
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    This guy... This guy does NOT know....

    BOOOOOOOOO
     
  11. skinut

    skinut Moderator
    Staff Member

    Jun 25, 2000
    Castle Pines, CO (or often elsewhere on earth)
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    I was hoping this would die the death it deserves because no one would reply, but as that has not happened, I'll make the request:

    Mods - can we lock this thing down?
     
    seamuslush and SixKick repped this.
  12. DeGregorus

    DeGregorus Member

    Oct 24, 1999
    Seis Esquinas
    ----Oak Park Bob, is that you?
     
  13. kenntomasch

    kenntomasch Member+

    Sep 2, 1999
    Out West
    Club:
    FC Tampa Bay Rowdies
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Note to Jayson...

    Good concept for a joke.

    Bad subject to choose and bad group of people to open that particular wound on.
     
  14. FairWeatherFan

    Sep 9, 2002
    Chicago
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
  15. Fireball_Dan

    Fireball_Dan New Member

    Jul 10, 2001
    Palos Park, IL
    Of course, a RotMasters fan would think that!!
     
  16. mactheknife

    mactheknife New Member

    Aug 2, 2002
    Baton Rouge, LA
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    now THIS GUY......THIS GUY is hilarious
     
  17. bunge

    bunge BigSoccer Supporter

    Oct 24, 2000
    Thank his, since we moved Shipp.
     
    Jiggly_333 repped this.
  18. xtomx

    xtomx Moderator
    Staff Member

    Chicago Fire
    Sep 6, 2001
    Northern Wisconsin, but not far from civilization
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    If only you had a time machine.
     
  19. chiladd

    chiladd Member+

    Mar 21, 1999
    Chicago
    Club:
    Chicago Fire
    For a minute I thought there was a poster with the name anus_hooligan :speechless:
     
    HeyFireGO and Chris M. repped this.
  20. Chris M.

    Chris M. Member+

    Jan 18, 2002
    Chicago
    He's Scottishly Curious.
     
    skinut, SixKick, Jiggly_333 and 2 others repped this.

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