I never saw it coming. The people spoke last night, and they spoke clearly. Not only did the Republicans win the presidency, but they made gains in the House and Senate as well. The pundits are saying the results hinged upon "values". The American people showed clearly what American values are: 1. We love war. We can't get enough of sending our troops to foreign country to kill and maim brown people. It doesn't matter that the war is misguided, immoral, or illegal. All that matters is that we display our "toughness" by dropping bombs on "them". We don't care that this strategy is creating terrorists faster than we can kill them. The only important thing is the killing. 2. We love torture. Put a hood on that camel-**********er, attach his testicles to a battery wire, and flick the switch. Shackle him up, ship him off to Jordan, and let them pull his fingernails out one by one. He was probably guilty of something. 3. Poor people are pathetic, wretched scum who deserve nothing but our scorn and contempt. This is what I have to say to the 5.2 million Americans who lost health care since 2000 and the 4.2 million who have fallen into poverty since 2000: get a job, you lazy sack of **********. 4. We don't give a damn about the environment. Americans don't mind that the air we breathe and the water we drink is being poisoned. Sell our national parks to the highest bidder, pave them over, and build a mall. 5. We would rather wipe our asses with the Constitution than defend it. Erase the separation of powers, and throw it all to the man in charge. Grant him the power to arbitrarily imprison anybody and deny the accused access to lawyers. Spy on me. Watch my every move. Crush dissent. 6. We could give two **********s about having an open, accountable government. Close the shutters. Make secret deals. Remove vital information from the public record. 7. We love massive deficits as far as the eye can see. Increase spending at record levels, but don't you dare come after my boss's tax cut. I would much rather my boss spend that money and make my children and grand children foot the bill. 8. Science is stupid. I don't care what your study says. I take my marching orders from God and God only. 9. Abortion is murder. Never mind that the fertility procedures, which I support, create far more discarded fetuses. What's important to me is that women are removed of the right to make decisions about their bodies. 10. And above all, we hate those **********ing queers. How dare they be afforded the same rights as me. How dare they threaten my marriage. Those are the values of America. But those are sure as hell not MY values. I'm outta this place.