It's as if people haven't been told for 20 years that MLS doesn't announce turnstile count, but the tickets sold -- err, "distributed."
Should hire the folks at Disney to start making animatronic fans to occupy seats. Just have to make sure their not the retired models of Dopey, Captain Hook and such.
I feel there should be a raccoon battle royal. RFK Raccoon King vs Bridgeview Skyway Raccoon vs Rocky Mountain Arsenal Raccoon vs any other MLS affiliated raccoon
I seem to recall an EPL team back in the '80s, maybe, that had some renovation going on and had to close a portion of the stadium (much like Dallas). They painted caricatures on the seats to look like people were sitting in them. EDIT: Now that I think about it, perhaps all new stadiums should do that. Instead of just painting all the seats the same color, paint caricatures on each. And as a bonus, for a small price, all season ticket holders get to have a caricature of themselves painted on their seat. EDIT II: Then, instead of the usual, "It looked like..." discussions; we could have, "That whole row was nothing but empty seats; that guy in the blue shirt never moved, and that lady next to him was smiling the whole game, even when the opposing team scored...."
Now we're thinking, people! Love the idea of having your doppleganger there to mark/fill your seat. ("Holy s*** am I that fat?!") I mean, if we're calling video games "e-sports" we might as well go full on virtual. Next stop: "It's better than the real thing! No more rain outs or days in the sun! No more lines at the concessions! Why, for few more bucks we'll even make sure the Rapids when the Champions League!"