Sorry if you've heard it. Liverpool, after selling Owen to Real Madrid, were desperate for a replacement. News came in of a young 'wonder boy' in Iraq. Scouts were sent out and the reports were good, so he was signed. He showed great promise in training and was put on the bench for the away game at Old Trafford. 20 mins. to go and Liverpool were losing 4-0. With nothing to lose, the kid from Iraq is sent into the fray. He plays a blinder and scores 5 goals, grabbing all 3 pts. for Liverpool. He phones his mum and says ' They love me mum, I scored five and I will be rich.' His mum is not pleased. ' While you were playing your father got shot in the leg, your two sisters got raped, I got mugged and your brother has joined a gang of looters.' ' Oh mum, I am sorry ' He replies. ' Sorry, sorry' say's his mum, ' It's your bloody fault we moved to Liverpool in the first place.'