I have a secret Man-Crush on...

Discussion in 'FC Dallas' started by FC Zippy, Aug 25, 2006.

  1. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Folks,

    Things have been too damned serious and we all need a break from the Hoops/Toros three game suck streak. They will get back on track soon (hopefully Sunday) and we'll all be happy little campers again. Until then, I think we should discuss important Man-stuff.

    Look, soccer is a very nuanced game. I'm relatively new to the sport and can barely tell the difference between a Clarence Goodson own-goal and erectile dysfunction, although there is a VERY nuanced difference there indeed.

    In my most humble of opinions, dear readers, we should all expose our deepest, darkest secrets. Yes, it is time for you all to post your secret Man-Crush.

    I will start. And you shall post. And Mr. 3rd Degree Buzz-Man, if you don't chime in, I'll never read your excellent web-rag again.

    Yes, I am calling you out.

    Ok, so my first secret Man-Crush is on Bobby Rhine. He's like way friendly and has almost Dirk Nowitsky-ish good hair. I have no hair. I want Bobby's. Yes, I admit it: I desire to have Bobby Rhine's hair. I will take it by force if I must, but I must OWN it.

    And my second is Kenny Cooper. Damn that boy. He's tall, he's slender- which again, I am an oafish old pig. And even though his complexion will get better with age, the fact that he has been on the same pitch with Wayne Rooney for business purposes AND can score headers makes me CRAZY with MAN-CRUSH ENVY. WHen he signed my Cooper jersey, I almost felt one nipple tighten slightly. NOW THAT IS A MAN-CRUSH.

    C'Mon, boys, time to 'fess up!
     
  2. texgator

    texgator New Member

    Oct 28, 2003
    Plano
    I admit.............you are gay.
     
  3. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    LOL. A Man-Crush has NOTHING to do with being gay. It is based on envy: more like wanting to be another male or posess some attribute of his.

    And you and the others are chicken-poops for not admitting you have Man-Crushes, too, because I know you do.
     
  4. jinxproof

    jinxproof New Member

    Apr 5, 2005
    Dallas, TX
    yup..............gay
     
  5. kebzach

    kebzach Member

    Dec 30, 2000
    Greenfield, WI
  6. idrinkgoodcoffee

    idrinkgoodcoffee New Member

    Feb 15, 2005
    Big D
    gaydar says 'flaming'
     
  7. 3rd Degree

    3rd Degree Member

    Feb 6, 2000
    Dallas
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    From the direction of this thread it appears that you have been outed instead.

    :D
     
  8. texgator

    texgator New Member

    Oct 28, 2003
    Plano
    Whatever Gayie McGayinstein.
     
  9. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    I just had the eye-popping realization that you all are RIGHT. I am Gay! It just took a bunch of soccer dorks to finally make me come to terms with it.

    Revelations are now flooding my very being! I also now realize that Soccer really IS just another boring 'foreign' game. I also realize Saddam was just 'misunderstood.' I realize I have been a lifelong democrat. I realize now that Carlos Ruiz is REALLY hurt every time he flops around on the turf. I realize now that the so-called 'Inferno' aren't really fans but are simply performing their public service as ordered under condition of their probation. I realize now that thanks to modern chemistry, sleep is now optional. I now realize that I am a HUGE Houston Dynamo fan and can't wait until MY TEAM comes here September 2nd. I now realize Al Gore was always right.

    Thank you everyone! You have changed my life FOREVER!
     
  10. FC Uptown

    FC Uptown New Member

    Feb 3, 2006
    H-town
    ...not that there's anything wrong with it....:D
     
  11. Rocket

    Rocket Member

    Aug 29, 1999
    Chicago
    Club:
    Everton FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    There're some definite man crushes around here, but for some reason folks are a bit reluctant to come out of the closet.

    england66 <=> Cooper, Jr
    Argentina78and86 <=> Sala
    ElJefe <=> ::::::
    etc

    And I gotta admit that Manck kinda turns me on. ;)
     
  12. DeigoRedD

    DeigoRedD Moderator
    Staff Member

    Aug 28, 2004
    Fort Worth, TX
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    :eek:

    Wow. Manck has a man-crushee. Wow.

    ;)
     
  13. Rocket

    Rocket Member

    Aug 29, 1999
    Chicago
    Club:
    Everton FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Hey, he even made an avatar in honor of me.

    What can I say. :)
     
  14. Scipio Gothicus

    Aug 6, 2001
    Cabo San Lucas
    Club:
    Celtic FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Fairuza Balk, for like ten years now. More recently, Emma Caulfield.

    Dead but dreaming,
    Scipio Diabolus,
    vox fatum.

    Contra.

    If Diegoredd says it is tv gold, what else do you need?
     
  15. italchacao

    italchacao New Member

    Mar 18, 2002
    Austin TX
    cooper? slender?
    yes, you're gay
     
  16. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Texgaytor.
     
  17. texgator

    texgator New Member

    Oct 28, 2003
    Plano
    What was it you were saying about "originality" in that other thread?
     
  18. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    I made ME laugh.
     
  19. oman

    oman Member

    Jan 7, 2000
    South of Frisconsin
    Be careful of the slippery slope. To even consider whether a man is "slender" or not -- that is kind of risky.

    I'd say Cooper is 100% grade A beefcake, and let's leave it at that.
     
  20. Rocket

    Rocket Member

    Aug 29, 1999
    Chicago
    Club:
    Everton FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    "Slender" and "boys" goes together, though.

    FC Zippy might like cheering for:

    [​IMG]
     
  21. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Dammit, Rocket, I tried to give you rep for the above, but it won't let me because I've already given you too much.

    I guess you now are on MY man-crush list.

    These things reveal themselves in the oddest ways...
     
  22. texgator

    texgator New Member

    Oct 28, 2003
    Plano
    Just to clear it up for you, Rod, this isn't flattering, it's scary. Run and hide.
     
  23. The Gribbler

    The Gribbler Member

    Jul 14, 1999
    Cedar Hill, Texas
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Since there seems to be a little homophobia in the room, I'll keep Zippy company. If I was forced to pick one Hoopster then it would be Cassar. He's a decent looking dude.
     
  24. Rocket

    Rocket Member

    Aug 29, 1999
    Chicago
    Club:
    Everton FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Yes, it is a bit unnerving.

    Zippy is a bit too fixated on this whole man-crush thing -- his best bet may to join the Posse and admire Bobby and Kenny from a distance. :)
     
  25. FC Zippy

    FC Zippy Member

    Aug 3, 2006
    Midland
    Club:
    FC Dallas
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    I just use my season tickets, located in Section 104, Row 7. Chris Gbandi's early cross that Kenny Cooper headed in in front of Matt Reis happened close enough that I coulda spit on him.

    But I am NOT fixated on the man-crush thing. I am fixated on the following: soccer, craniums, forks, alien abductions, plagues of locusts, music, narcotics, 1310 The Ticket, dirty thoughts, grain elevators, poker, money, ice caps, glandular disorders, crunchy peanut butter, hypnosis, Winning Eleven 9, teeth, grooming issues, dying in clean undies, cat food, gasoline prices, Anna Kournikova, bar-b-que, and international monetary funds.
     

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