NSR: Give me your rested, your rich, privileged White Colombians yearning to post in soccer forums...

Q: Did you post that picture of yourself depicted as Jesus Christ?

TRUMP: I did post it and I thought it was me as a doctor and had to do Red Cross. Only the fake news could come up with that one. pic.twitter.com/z5tPuqSvA7

— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) April 13, 2026

 

This is terrible. This money could be used for Israel or corporate subsidies. https://t.co/d0wzyenulg

— DJ Branham 🗽 (@DJBranham) April 12, 2026

 

Trump’s “Door Dash Grandma” is from Arkansas, a long way from the White House.

This stunt was staged by Door Dash in coordination with Trump’s White House. pic.twitter.com/qEl8dAGGLJ

— PatriotTakes 🇺🇸 (@patriottakes) April 13, 2026

 

Here’s a picture of my doctor making house calls pic.twitter.com/IUY6xuix4q

— Jamie Bonkiewicz (@JamieBonkiewicz) April 13, 2026

 

“I’m Dr. Trump, and this is my nurse, Byron Noem. He is highly respected.” pic.twitter.com/ovFzcMm3bZ

— Hoodlum 🇺🇸 (@NotHoodlum) April 13, 2026

 

JD Vance on Donald Trump’s Truth Social post depicting himself as Jesus:

“Trump was posting a joke and, of course, he took it down because he recognized that a lot of people weren’t understanding his humor in that case.” pic.twitter.com/G6tzb85Urg

— Republicans against Trump (@RpsAgainstTrump) April 13, 2026

 

Péter Magyar, the new Hungarian prime minister, says CPAC was paid by the Hungarian government and will not be any longer https://t.co/uJIWLhqSop

— Roger Sollenberger (@SollenbergerRC) April 13, 2026

 

Now it all makes sense, y’all. She’s a MAGA prop. Here’s DoorDash Granny at a Nevada hearing for the Big Beautiful Bill last year 🤡 https://t.co/XQLVhs4oJl pic.twitter.com/KyJC28Wp7D

— shelby (@thetrueshelby) April 13, 2026

 

OMG! Who made this? 🤣 pic.twitter.com/FXFXb10ugq

— Lucas Sanders 👊🏽🔥🇺🇸 (@LucasSa56947288) April 13, 2026

 

NEW: I called Donald Trump to ask him about a top FEMA official who said he teleported to Waffle House.

After I explained it, Trump asked “what does teleport mean” and “was he kidding?” Adding, “It just sounds a little strange, but I know nothing about teleporting or him.” pic.twitter.com/iTqaAVqAK8

— Andrew Kaczynski (@KFILE) April 14, 2026

 

Exclusive and free to read @TheAthleticFC

FIFA’s senior executives & Gianni Infantino have spoken about him making a President-to-President plea to Donald Trump for a *full* ICE raid moratorium across the United States during World Cup. https://t.co/ASas8MxRsw

— Adam Crafton (@AdamCrafton_) April 14, 2026

 

NEW: Gregg Phillips, the high ranking FEMA official who said he’s teleported to a waffle house has a history of claiming supernatural encounters.

A dead girlfriend once lifted his car off the road to avoid a crash. Satan once spoke to him while he walked across Spain. After… pic.twitter.com/MqyHotjjgW

— Andrew Kaczynski (@KFILE) April 14, 2026

 

Only two possible explanations for the multiple supernatural claims by high-ranking FEMA official Greg Phillips:

1. Greg Phillips takes psychedelic drugs.

2. Greg Phillips is batshit crazy.

Either way, he needs to resign immediately. We can’t have him hallucinating on the job. https://t.co/cSWAJQ5WUh

— Ted Lieu (@tedlieu) April 14, 2026