OK, the Laws, such as they are, were stipulated to in the previous thread. Any discussion of the Laws should take place there. This thread is for the draft. The order is: Knave Val Cop Shoot Cop Brummie Nutter Roby Chaski @Knave is on the clock.
Well, shit, I'm up ... now I've gotta scramble. You all probably expect me to go with the easy choice and pick George Washington. But phooey on that, and three demerits to the conventional mind that chooses that guy. No, I'm going for the biggest, baddest jerk of a founding father that I can think of on short notice. Aaron Fcuking Burr! He killed Hamilton, had no regrets about it, but escaped prosecution. And he was arrested and prosecuted for treason following the Burr Conspiracy. Ain't none of your other damn founding fathers got a conspiracy named after 'em! Founding father bona fides: no his name wasn't on any founding documents, but he fought in the Revolutionary War and is listed here. Good enough for me. Since I had to go first, and I'm about to run out the door, that's all you get. @Val1 is on the clock.
FYI, tomorrow is going to be a problem for me - I'm working the polls: 630a to 900p or later. edit - on second thought, I'll send a proxy vote to @Val1, if you don't mind. I'd send it to Brummie, but he's likely gonna be bat shit crazy tomorrow.
As per the other thread, yes. Updated order: Knave Val Cop Shoot Cop Brummie Nutter Roby Chaski taos Don't forget to tag me when you pick!
Rewriting the Laws here: I'm going to throw up, for a variety of reasons, regardless of the outcomes.
I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White House - with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone. John F. Kennedy As a UVa grad, there is no way I could allow anyone else to select Mr Jefferson, even if I could have selected him for greater value down-draft. His reputation was "slandered" in another thread here just in the past couple of days, but for bona fides, HE WROTE THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE!!! He had to write a document that could unify all the warring delegates in Philadelphia, he had to unite the colonists, and he had to make the case for independence. Yeah, there's a reason schoolkids only memorize the first three paragraphs, but short of Lincoln's Gettysburg Address nothing finer has been written in America's annals. And there's the other thing. The Louisiana Purchase. And the mapping of it, showing the kind of mind that Kennedy would highlight. But perhaps the finer expression of that intellect can be found on the Grounds of the University of Virginia. I could mention his description of the idealized yeoman farmer, his years in the presidency, or any of half a dozen other factors, but I keep coming back to this: But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such government, and to provide new guards for their future security. Val's Draft: Mr Jefferson @Cop Shoot Cop is up next. @American Brummie is on deck.
I have a number of thoughts on which person I should select here, but I am going to go with a ridiculous choice, 'cause I think he does not get enough recognition. Robert Morris. If the founding of the United States was a caper film, he would be the money. Plus he had reservations about the Declaration of Independence, voiced them, and signed it anyway after agreeing to abstain from the PA delegates vote so that PA would not stand in the way of what the clear majority of other states wanted. And he recommended Alexander Hamilton to be Secretary of the Treasury. Not a deeply-reasoned list of reasons for choosing the man, but it worked for me. @American Brummie is up next.
There's only one first pick for this fellow-displaced Irishman. He is possibly the most famous New Jerseyan (Jerseyite?) of all time. He proposed the plan to the Constitutional Convention that has given us the Senate. He helped draft the 1789 Judiciary Act, upon which we derive our modern system of courts. And he served ably as a governor and Associate Justice of the Supreme Court. Iiiit's William Paterson! @soccernutter
Who do you think you are when you run away from home, save a drunken sailor, meet your future wife when you look like and unmade, dirty bed, and crash on the steps of a church? You are the guy who played with lightening (invented the lightening rod), paid attention to weather patterns (was a meteorologist), invented the flexible catheter (because he drank so much, no doubt), and founded the first library, volunteer fire department, and public hospital. You suggested day light savings time (so that Knave could vote for Trump, of course). You drew the first political cartoon. You used "positive" and "negative" to describe electricity. You started the kale fad. And, most importantly, you tried out vegetarianism. Oh, and there was that whole Abolitionist and signing of the Declaration of Independence thing, too. That's right, you are Ben (Yeah, I know, traditional, but the guy is just so cool. He also is said to have said one of my favorite quotes, probably wrongly noted, as is the one above: "We shall all hang together, or, most assuredly, we will all hang separately.") @roby
Seeing that Val already picked Jefferson as his Fondling Father [Sally etc] I'm gonna go with John Adams. Without him here would be no John Quincy Adams thus no Quincy Ma. and thus no Quincy Yacht Club. I spent a year there in a trailer while on a job gratis only traveling home on weekends. Saved myself beaucoup bucks! @chaski
John Paul Jones. At one point, the naval academy immortalized in stone not only "I have not yet begun to fight" but also the "officer and a gentleman" letter, the "that flag and I" passage, and "give me a fast ship, for I intend to go in harm's way." A man with an argumentative nature, a terrible temper, and a shady past, Jones was one of a great number of adventurers who flocked to the colonial cause in hopes of making something of themselves after an unpromising start. This one also featured a need for achievement, a daring, and a competence which almost made it happen for him... The losses of the "Drake" the "Serapis" and the "Countess of Scarborough," though greatly to Jones' credit, did not seriously harm the Royal Navy-- but the dichos provided inspiration to a host of future naval officers of these United States. @ Knave
No space next time. Two things: 1. We need a running list somewhere so we don't repeat any picks. 2. I'm taking my sweet 4 hours of time with this pick. I've got until midnight Pacific ... -- Actually, a third thing: 3 demerits to @chaski per my first pick.
Done http://forums.bigsoccer.com/threads/founding-fathers-whose-your-daddy-the-selection-thread.2036729/ Somebody might want to update tomorrow if we get though round 2 (and/or round 3). After that, I'll be back.
He was just the rotter who gave her drugs in hopes of getting in her pants. The kidnapping was by future supporters of Donald Trump.
Well...it's almost like when Groucho shot an elephant in his pajamas. How the elephant got into his pajamas is a mystery.
Well, inside of an elephant its too dark to do anything but sleep, so at least the "why" is under control...
On the eve of this particular presidential election it's only right that my second pick go too ... Abigail Adams The nation's second first lady, a regular, and valuable political advisor to her husband, John Adams, mother of John Quincy Adams, advocate for women's political rights and opportunities, and an all around bad ass dame. A passage of note from one of her more famous letters: “I long to hear that you have declared an independency. And, by the way, in the new code of laws which I suppose it will be necessary for you to make, I desire you would remember the ladies and be more generous and favorable to them than your ancestors. Do not put such unlimited power into the hands of the husbands. Remember, all men would be tyrants if they could. If particular care and attention is not paid to the ladies, we are determined to foment a rebellion, and will not hold ourselves bound by any laws in which we have no voice or representation.” -- March 31, 1776 to John Adams & The Continental Congress Isn't that great!? (Oh, and if you want to disqualify her because she's a founding mamma, not a founding poppa, then you can kiss my grits.) -- @Val1 is on the clock!
James Madison So after drafting the author of the Declaration of Independence, I'll scoop up the father of the Constitution and the Bill of Rights. He was of course our 4th President, but for me he's the author of Federalist 10 and 14, probably the two most significant political treatises written in America, and in the course of writing The Federalist Papers with Hamilton and John Jay, the reason we have a democratic government that could withstand the notion of a Trumpian presidency. Madison would today be considered a flip-flopper. One of my favorite tidbits about him is that after authoring a relatively strong central government, he nevertheless is author of the Kentucky and Virginia Resolutions, which held, in response to the Alien and Sedition Acts, that states could nullify unconstitutional laws. Could anyone imagine a politician today opposing their signature life's work in such a matter? I didn't think so. Val's Draft: Mr Jefferson James Madison Now, I've got to sweat out the remainder of this round, because my draft will be made by the gentleman who I want to pick third. @Cop Shoot Cop is up.