Easter Bunny landing some rabbit punches in the Land of the Mouse https://theconcourse.deadspin.com/bar-hopping-easter-bunny-takes-no-prisoners-in-brutal-o-1834228940
Only Florida Man can be killed by a Cassowary ten thousand miles from Cassowary country. Ive long advocated a Cassowary vs Andrew Hauptman cage match in the cock-fighting pit behind Toyota Park but never knew where to get a Cassowary. Now I know where to get one with a bit of applicable experience. What do you think a blooded in Cassowary costs these days? https://www.sciencealert.com/a-florida-man-has-been-killed-by-a-cassowary-apparently-the-world-s-most-dangerous-bird
Although I have never seen one up close, their claws are something from the cretaceous period. If you have every held a parrot and thought "these guys have sharp claws" imagine what a cassowary could do.
Why aren't the Aussies rounding that thing up or blasting it with a rifle? Just wanders around on the beach does it?
I thought, there's no way in hell that funny looking thing is tougher than an ostrich. Then I saw the claws...
If you can get your ass to Madison County this weekend, you can place a bid on that very bird. https://www.gainesville.com/news/20190422/auction-includes-cassowary-that-killed-alachua-county-man
Close, Florida Men! White members of a gang forcibly covered a black member’s gang tattoo with a phrase including a racial slur, according to Marion County Sheriff’s Office. The evidence on Michael Hart’s neck said, “F--- you, Niger.” According to what police say Lucian Evans told them, he, Brandon Hayley, Brett Singleton and Mary Elizabeth Durham were trying to discipline Hart, not insult an African nation. Hart had violated gang rules, Evans said. https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article229946699.html
Close, Florida journalist: CORRECTION: The previous headline and first paragraph of this story misstated the skin tone of the victim. Michael Hart is a white man.
Well, at least they didn't insult Nigeria. I mean, that is one bad-ass country! Who else got kicked out of the African Cup of Nations for executing a poet?
Florida women are really fighting for the title this year: https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article230091664.html When a Florida deputy asked a woman if she had anything else on her during a routine traffic stop, he wasn’t expecting what she did next. She “proceeded to pull an alligator out of her yoga pants (about one foot in length) and placed it into the bed of the truck,” the Charlotte County Sheriff’s deputy said in an incident report. Read more here: https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article230091664.html#storylink=cpy
The same way that Grocho Marx once shot an elephant in his pajamas. How it got into his pajamas was the mystery.
https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-new...fter-middle-east-n1005976?cid=sm_npd_nn_tw_ma Comic Ahmed Ahmed tells a joke, Florida man thinks he’s starting a terrorist cell.
I especially liked this response..."Terrorists don’t do meet-and-greets," the comic said. "We don't say, `Death to America!' and then, `But wait, let's do selfies first.' "