End of 2022 Off Season Thread

Hard to figure out what thread to put this in, but DC's big summer signings were paid the following annualized amounts in 2022:

Benteke: $4,000,000 base, $4,182,778 guaranteed
Ravel: $850,000 base, $917,844 guaranteed
Palsson: $850,000 base, $863,125 guaranteed
Rodriguez: $456,000 base, $597,200 guaranteed

 

Rodriguez could be a good deal at that kind of money. The others are not.

 

Wow, they saw us coming! The only one that's remotely worth it is Rodriguez' contract.

 

At least our coach is making a lot of money...

 

Who do you think owns the recruitment of Rodriguez, Rooney, Howe & Mairs, or Rushton? And who owns the failures that led us to Benteke?

If Benteke doesn't pan out, Rooney may well leave this franchise just as ********ed as Losada did.

 

We're right in the middle of the pack - Some high rollers didn't make the playoffs or got - Some really low on the list did

 

and I would have gotten away with it too if it wasn't for you meddling kids.

 

Philadelphia is humiliating the rest of the league right now.

 

If you factor in what we paid for Rooney vs. other teams paying their coach, we're top 8.

 

And TFC saw 0% improvement (by PPG) when they added the two most expensive players in the league. They continue to be the worst-run team in the league.

 

Saint Louis is paying a goalkeeper over $1.6M, so at least DC isn't doing *that*.

 

and a GK who's not even especially good at that. But they have a nice stadium

 

With MLS and second-flight USL Championship regular seasons now over, D.C. United and Loudoun United finished with a combined ...

15-43-10 record
55 of possible 204 points
-73 goal differential#dcu

— Steven Goff (@SoccerInsider) October 18, 2022

 

Tradition!!!

 

This reminds me that I had originally intended to start my post with ... It Takes More ... but your comment/slogan may be more appropriate

 

Big news everybody...we signed a gk from Loudoun. Champs next year!

 

-73 over the course of 68 games is impressive. That will be hard to match next year, but I'm sure we'll give it a go. Maybe Ryan Reynolds can buy a share of the team and we'll have our own Hulu show, too. Would be more entertaining than watching them actually play soccer, anyway.

 

Pee-yew!

 

Tryna decide if that Hulu show would be a comedy or a tragedy.

Based on recent returns, probably not in the sports category.

 

If you forget about Rooney and take away Benteke because he contributed next to nothing we're still a bottom third payroll.

Rooney & Benteke are distractions to shut the fans and SGs up.

Rooney lets ownership say they brought in a guy who was successful in a better league under tougher circumstances. And Bentke just diverts attention from the failures of the summer transfer window while also helping keep Levien's yacht from floating away when it's anchored.

 

Welcome to the correct crew

 

It would be a dark comedy. Sort of like It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia

 

I was thinking it would be a story about an ageing beauty that continually has plastic surgery done by an incompetent doctor so keeps looking worse until they turn into a monster that dramatically eats Deadpool in front of a horrified Rob...

The only comedy is that it is reality....