Controlling emotions on the field...

Discussion in 'Player' started by FCBayern1613, Dec 13, 2005.

  1. FCBayern1613

    FCBayern1613 New Member

    Nov 20, 2005
    My coach for my high school soccer team has a no tolerance rule with talking to the refs and such, now i am one to say something to the ref if there is a bad call. I have gotten many cards for my mouth and just getting frusterated. I have also been thrown out of some indoor games, and i was wondering how to keep your cool during games???
  2. deano7

    deano7 New Member

    Apr 27, 2005
    I use to be like you lol, but now i just think what is the point? What is the point of getting a booking or sending off just for disagreeing with a ref.
  3. Madison midfielder38

    Sep 29, 2005
    I know how you feel I just try to keep my cool. So I dont know how either
  4. FCBayern1613

    FCBayern1613 New Member

    Nov 20, 2005
    yeah thats what my dad says to me all the time it gets you no where, but i will hold it in and then i just boil over.
  5. AfroSmiley

    AfroSmiley New Member

    Sep 22, 2005
    Take it out on the other team. :D

    Also, try to remember that there's pretty much no way the ref is going to change a call he made just because you disagree.
  6. furyboy999

    furyboy999 New Member

    Oct 16, 2004
    I can see why your coach would have a no tolerance to not yell at the ref, but if hte ref makes a call i don;t see why it's not ok to question what or why the call was made, just dont be sarcastic or mean, or rude. Personally i am not one to go off talking with him nor yelling, but i have gotten my times where i have gotten to the point where i've gotten very frustrated with the red and yelled about the call not directly at him but enouhg for him to hear me. I know it is partially due to my maturity ( I'm a freshman) and i tend to get frustrated with the size difference for me playing varisty.

    Hopefully this helps, the refs mess up just as much as you do during the game, it's not going to be perfect, yeh maybe it was a bad call, just don't talk to the ref, say it in your head, and get a luahg at how bad he is, but just don't say anything out loud, use your imagination on how funny it would be to say it to him.
  7. t.z0n3

    t.z0n3 New Member

    Oct 14, 2005
    Kansas, USA
    Sporting Kansas City
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Well, whenever I get angry, I just imagine myself kicking the ref in the balls, then him faling slowly agonizingly to the gorund...

    Then I laugh. :D
  8. FCBayern1613

    FCBayern1613 New Member

    Nov 20, 2005
    ja das ist gut, good stuff good stuff, definately good ideas, i also am a freshman on varsity, and it seems like the refs are better the older the age group and the less i get frushtrated which is good, so thanks again for the ideas.
  9. usasoccerhooligan

    May 1, 2005
    i will usually talk to the referee in a friendly matter, saying things like "Sir, that has to be a card." or whatever. i don't do it in a rude matter and usually refs are ok with me doing that. granted, i'm a captain so i can get away with more talking.

    NEVER yell directly at a ref. if i'm reffing a game and someone yells loudly at me, that player won't be playing for a game or two.

    be sure to try not to take it out on your team. you yelling at your teammates cus of the ref will only hurt your team and cause problems with communication and teamwork.
  10. NHRef

    NHRef Member+

    Apr 7, 2004
    Southern NH
    As a ref, I have no problem with players asking me a question, as long as they remember a few things:
    - I may be busy getting the game going again and won't have time to answer.
    - It is NOT a debate. When I answer, it's over, you asked you got your answer, case closed.
    - keep it friendly/polite

    I use to play racquetball and was a bit of a hothed, then I watched another hothead play and commented how much of an idiot he was. My wife commented that he looked just like me. solved that problem.
  11. FCBayern1613

    FCBayern1613 New Member

    Nov 20, 2005
    yeah thats my problem i get so caught up in the game i am yelling not having a civalized word with the ref.
  12. VOwithwater

    VOwithwater New Member

    Oct 17, 2005
    Had a guy like that listen your big mouth can hurt the team. When you get a yellow does he pull you out before you get another one? If not he should. Player wanted to come back in I said if you put this over your mouth duck tape :)

    He stopped doing it after that.

    Do you speak another language complain in that language hopefully the ref won'r understand what you said.

    It is not your place to talk to a official to argue a call. Just play the fing game.

    On wanting to get a dirty player who fouled you. After the foul smile at him, and before the game is over give him better then you got as the ball changes possession and the officials stops and looks away.
  13. ToonUSA

    ToonUSA New Member

    Jan 11, 2005
    Bingo. Except when the ref answers you back in that language. :eek: That was ugly.
  14. Skizz

    Skizz Guest

    As captain of my team I need to be able to keep my emotions in check, even when things go against me. The thing I remember is something momma used to say - treat others how you would want to be treated. Talk to the referee in a civilised manner and they will treat you with that same dignity 99% of the time. Screaming at players to get them hyped up is a different thing, but remember if you piss the ref off, they are still human beings and they may take a dislike to you. You see it in pro football all the time, and it has happened to me.

    If something adverse happens, count to ten, and if you still feel your point is worth making take it up with the referee, that's my advice.

    bigg skizzle
  15. jvillefreelance

    jvillefreelance New Member

    Jul 26, 2005
    Wilmington, NC
    I disagree with refs a lot, and I let them know it, but I do it in a respectful manner. I have never gotten a card for my mouth, (not to brag) but I would say that when it comes to the ref and mouthing off, that I am one of the coolest players my age. IDK why, but I never lose my temper (or at least let it be shown that I do). As Afro said,"take it out on the other team," what gets me mad is when a player is just playing outright dirty, and I'll play dirty right back, or if people are talking sh!t to me, I'll talk back, but for me all that isn't serious, its just getting in their heads...
  16. ZeekLTK

    ZeekLTK Member

    Mar 5, 2004
    Nat'l Team:
    I dunno what to tell you except listen to your coach I guess. Ever since I started playing when I was little I "adopted" your coach's philosophy. I never say a word to either my opponent or the ref. If he makes a bad call maybe I shake my head, but that's about it. Most of the time I know I committed a foul though, so I just retreat and wait for the free kick to start. I think the refs notice/appriciate this and maybe that's why I've been playing so long (I started in like 2nd grade and am a junior in college now) and I have yet to be shown a card, ever.
  17. MLS SupaStr3

    MLS SupaStr3 New Member

    Jul 2, 2003
    don't talk to the ref, it's like talking to a wall.
  18. vanity_soccer13

    Apr 14, 2004
    you can get someone worse than they got you within the laws of the game. it doesn't have to be dirty to hurt- you just have to get the ball.
  19. NHRef

    NHRef Member+

    Apr 7, 2004
    Southern NH
    Just like to point out that "getting the ball" doesn't change anything about a foul or not. That's one of the biggest things refs hear all the time "not a foul, I got the ball!" Wrong, still can be foul, the ball is irrelvant.
  20. vanity_soccer13

    Apr 14, 2004
    if you slide, get the ball, and then the player falls, that's a foul?
  21. NHRef

    NHRef Member+

    Apr 7, 2004
    Southern NH
    Actually it might be, might not be, depends what made the player fall. If you take the ball and he trips over you/ball, then nope, not a foul, if after you get the ball your second leg comes through and takes him out, this is a foul. One of those "have to see it" things to be sure, and I've seen both types of refs as a player, coach and ref, some will call a foul cause someone fell, must be a foul (wrong) and some will not call a foul cause you got the ball (not always right). I just get a kick out of players, coaches and parents who think the act of getting the ball absolves them from all other actions.
  22. tscboys

    tscboys Member+

    Sep 7, 2004
    I hate ref's..their douchebags..especially when your team is playin' up an age group, or your a freshman who gets a lot of minutes on varsity (in my last game i took my cleat off after the game and walked up to the ref and my foot was probably 75% bruised and i said "thanks for missin' the call"..ya he got pissed off and started lecturin' me the whole time i just looked at my foot)..there's nothing you can really do about stupid refs..bitchin' only makes them hate you more, and then if your from a smallish town in the south, talkin' to them nicely makes them think your bein' a smart arse..??? There impossible egotistical b!tches who only took that job up because they got the sh!t beat out of them as kids..
  23. nafi16

    nafi16 Member

    Jan 11, 2004
    Toronto, Canada
    i'm play with a lot of passion wherever i play, and i always make it a point to let the ref know, haha mostly in a polite fashion, that i disagree. however, me being the smartarse as i am, can really get into the ref's nerves and get really sarcastic with him. so far i've only gotten a stern warning for my adventures. i think they don't like it when they're made to look stupid in front of everyone by a player lol.

    i must admit i do also take it out on the opponent when things don't go my way haha, but i've gotten pretty good at hiding it and looking very innocent =D. i was reading these articles and pros were saying how they use these 'cheeky' tactics on the field. for example, when ronaldo is running with a defender, he'd lightly tap the guy's calf as he's running, and 5 mins later he'll cramp up. hahaha it's quite clever that.
  24. vanity_soccer13

    Apr 14, 2004
    my idea was just what was acceptable within the laws. Nothing malicious, like scissoring a player- but if you got the ball, it isn't a foul. I know that is.
  25. vanity_soccer13

    Apr 14, 2004
    my idea was just what was acceptable within the laws. Nothing malicious, like scissoring a player- but if you got the ball, it isn't a foul. I know that is. Ball doesn't necessarily mean it's not a foul. Just what I had pictured in my own mind isn't a foul.

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