Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Hmmm. They say witches don't perish. They can always be called back. Maybe there is something to that.
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 According to the NFPA, on average fires caused by Christmas trees kill 15 people a year, and cause more than $16 million in damage. A war on Christmas is a war that benefits the American citizen.
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Merry Christmas from Laura Bush: December 24, 2005 Dearest Brothers and Sisters in Jesus Christ, Holiday -- oopsie, I mean CHRISTMAS (as in "you darn well better be celebrating the love of MY particular Lord or can just shut the H-E-double-L up!") -- Greetings from the Bush Family! We hope that the one and only true Messiah's Birthday finds you and your traditional nuclear family as happy, healthy, and, more importantly, prosperous as our own. As I dictate this letter from the heated outdoor pool here at Camp David, a lovely snow is gently drifting down all around me, and a wonderful, festive-smelling steam is rising from the 100-proof "Jolly Gin" hot toddy I am slurping out of my 72-ounce Thermos. My goodness, it's so hard to believe that 2005 is already drawing to a close. Why, it seemed like every time George and I had almost caught our heavily-minted breath, I was time for yet another month-long vacation. I'm sure I don't need to tell any of you out there about how exhausting not working can be! Nevertheless, before we hunker down for the serious pre-New Years libations, I wanted to take a minute to send a heartfelt, highly personal family update to you, our dear friend/neighbor/colleague/mother-in-law/patron/sycophant. (Circle One) George has now been at His current job for almost five whole years. Overall, He continues to enjoy it as much as any of the previous jobs Ma Bar badgered Him into, despite the many frustrating challenges and surprises it presents Him with. If you can believe it – given His landslide 2.7% paperless electronic vote victory last fall – certain fickle busybodies still persist in expecting my hubby to care about anyone's well-being or opinions but His own. But it's like I tell everyone, "Don't feel all put out and angry when George pointedly ignores your advice. Half the time, He even tells Jesus to take a hike -- especially when he is blabbing on about all that New Testament pacifistic, socialist nonsense." Given everything though, I am so proud of George for becoming so comfortable with the job that he is now able to squeeze in time for His beloved mid-day naps - even right smack-dab in the middle of a press conference! Our darling daughter Jenna has blossomed into ripe and boisterous womanhood, and nary a month goes by when George and I do not marvel at her seemingly limitless capacity for adventure, cover-charges and stimulation. I trust that you if you heard recent reports of a cocaine dealer supposedly having Jenna's purse with $1,000 in cash in it, you joined me in a feeling of profound vexation that someone who looks just like my lovely Christian daughter is walking around with her purse and driver's license buying drugs! I am also proud to report that Jenna has decided to follow in my footsteps, and as such became a teacher nine months ago. In another nine short months, she will have duplicated my interminable teaching career (which is the perfect length for invoking ad nauseum for 30 years!) and will be free to marry her very own impishly handsome, barfing barfly with an endearingly chronic post-nasal drip. Our other daughter is alive and well – or so the Secret Service told me sometime around March. Of course, despite all the annoying demands of family and life in Washington, our beloved Scottish Terriers remain the true apples of our eye. That Miss Beazley – what a little spitfire! Just last week, as George and I were enjoying Cabo Wabo Tequilia eggnog shots over breakfast, who should trot up in her little silk Christmas robe but Miss Beazley, proudly bearing a new mahogany chew toy she had gnawed off another John Quincy Adams empire settee. And as for Barney, I am pleased to say that after being dropped on his head by George on that airport tarmac last year, the seizures, blood-vomiting, and priapism have mostly subsided. Besides, it's not like we are hoping for the worst, but George and I both agreed that he will still be absolutely adorable stuffed! As for me, 2005 was my year to finally unwind and catch up on my beloved reading. As you can imagine, quite a few issues from my subscriptions to McCalls, Reader's Digest and TV Guide had piled up while I was reciting pre-written speeches to all those awful crowds in 2004. So every day this year, I have risen promptly at noon, poured myself an invigorating adult beverage, and worked my nicotine-stained fingers to the bone turning the pages of those poor, neglected periodicals. Mind you, the stench from all those wet, soggy Katrina Negroes almost made me lose my place a couple of times while I was trying to look caring! Fortunately, it's proven such a successful regimen overall, I've decided to extend it straight through 2006! In closing, I want to thank you on behalf of the entire Bush family for your worshipful and lucrative support throughout 2005. Please don't ever change – we love the money you send us just the way it is!
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 "OK - i gotta problem with these left-wing, fire code enforcing firemen in Rhode Island, OK." Bill would've treated the tree to a falafel massage or whatever it is he jerks off with.
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 I find both sides in the "War on Christmas" to be tedious annoying people. The "anti-Christmas" types -- yes you, ACLU, AUSCC and the rest -- you come off as radical killjoys. You are like the folks at a kid's birthday party who start telling the kids that their diapers are destroying the planet and want the cake to be made out of tofu instead of ice cream. I hope you are crused for eternity to listen to Handel's Messiah. To the "Pro-Christmasers" -- just shut up and enjoy the holdiay. Not everyone in America is a Christian. Not every Christian in America is a fundamentalist Protestant or a traditionalist Catholic. Jesus was not even born on December 25 (shepards would not have been "abiding in the fields" on a December night, they would have been home in bed, even in Judea). Christmas, while a religous holiday, also is a secular holdiay, with roots that cross many different culturals and religions. So drink some eggnog and take a day off from the "culture war" already.
Here's one more view of the 'Christmas War,' which appeared in the California section of the 12/23 issue of the Los Angeles Times. "If it's a war, Christmas won" by Randye Hoder "No matter how hard I try, I can't understand the hullabaloo over Christmas this year. Jerry Falwell, James Dobson, Bill O'Reilly and the Wall Street Journal's editorial writers are apoplectic over some perceived secular conspiracy to turn Christmas into a politically correct, generic, unholy holiday." "Clearly, these guys have never been to the Grove." "I was there just the other day, and I can assure you that Christmas at L.A.'s hottest outdoor mall is alive and well. In fact, there in the heart of the heavily Jewish Fairfax district-so Jewish that the Grove features a kiosk serving kosher sausages and hot dogs-there is hardly a nod to any holiday except Christmas." "Were the right-wingers grousing about the crass commercialization of Christ's birthday, I'd be singing from the same hymnal. But their insistence that there's an unrelenting campaign to eliminate all signs and symbols of the faith rings completely false-especially at a place such as the Grove." "There's the mall's 100-foot Christmas tree-'taller than the tree at Rockefeller Center' and 'among the largest public Christmas displays in the country,' boasts a sign beneath the towering white fir. For good measure, the tree is decorated with 15,000 sparkling lights and 10,000 ornaments." "In the middle of the Grove rises Santa's house, a candy-covered palace that seems, at a glance, to be as big as many a Hancock Park mansion (and where, for $12 to $60, children can have their picture taken with the jolly man in red). And above it all, Santa and his reindeer hover near the Grove's neon sign." "From the moment you get out of your car in the parking lot, until the time you leave, Christmas music is wafting through the air. And it's not just festive songs such as 'Jingle Bells' (originally a Thanksgiving tune) that fill your ears. When I was there, 'The First Noel' was playing: This star drew night to the northwest, O'er Bethlehem it took its rest; And there it did both stop and stay, Right over the place where Jesus lay, Noel, Noel, Noel, Noel, Born is the King of Israel. "Christmas carolers stroll the Grove, serenading shoppers. Vendors hawk roasted chestnuts and eggnog (though no Hanukkah latkes or banana custard with raisins for Kwanzaa). And the Top Hats, a Rockettes-style chorus line of high-heeled women in red-and-white miniskirts, entertain along the Grove's trolley line." "In short, there is nothing inclusive or the least bit politically correct at the Grove, which has boasted of drawing more visitors than Disneyland." "Not that I'm complaining. Christmas is a beautiful holiday (all the kitsch at the Grove notwithstanding). And with Christians making up more than three-quarters of the U.S. population, I expect to be inundated with Christmas for at least six weeks each year: on TV, on the radio and while I'm out shopping." "But it gets irritating when members of the far right whine about a conspiracy to 'push the Christian faith aside and generic-ize it,' as the Wall Street Journal recently put it, quoting Bishop Eddie Long. The Journal's editorial went on to opine against 'the systematic neutralization of a religious holiday' while wondering 'how low...can the secularizers sink?'" "Give me a break. 'Happy Holiday' cards from a White House that wants to appear broad-minded and wishes of 'Happy Holidays' from retailers that want to extend the shopping season and expand their profits hardly amount to the systematic neutralization of anything. Christmas has always been ubiquitous in America, and even in our PC age it continues to be so." "For all the hollering about the 'war on Christmas,' this is a totally one-sided battle. And as part of the American minority that isn't Christian, I can't help but wonder, 'For God's sake, what are those guys griping about?'"
and this pretty much says it all IMO.... Funny it is the conservatives, the self-avowed people who profess the PC police has gone too far (and i agree at times it has) who quibble over a couple of word..... MErry Christmas/ Happy Holidays on a store sign or a card...who places so much importance on these? All I know is BOR keeps proving time and time again what a waste of air time he is... And yes, the overwhelming majority of AMerican is Christian (albeit of different kinds) so really ......what is all the bitching about indeed?!!!!!?
Seems to me that when it comes to celebrating the baby Jesus, some Christians are concentrating on the baby part and not the Jesus part.
You know, I was doing a bit of research and found out who actually destroyed the religious significance of Christmas. It was the American Protestant Christians. The most obvious thing they did was get rid of Advent after World War II; it was traditionally a time of repentance and contemplation of the wickedness of the world. But they also got rid of Candlemas (Feb 2) - the celebration of the purification of the Blessed Virgin Mary and traditional end of the Christmas season - in the late 19th century and turned it into Groundhog Day. Childermas (Dec 28), the mass commemorating the innocent children slaughtered by Herod, has slipped into oblivion. The Feast of the Epiphany (Jan. 6) is also gone from mainstream culture. This was all done purposefully by the Protestants, at first to reduce what they thought of as Catholic influence on government and culture, and later as a means to further business interests. The secularization of Christmas is something they started, and now that it has "gone to far" they have no one to blame but themselves.
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 An otherwise excellent post marred by the phrase "Traditionalist Catholic." WTF is that? And why lump them in with the fundies?
Hmmm. I guess I didn't make my point as well as I could have. Which is that some people are being babies about the whole thing.
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 People like my aunt who told me I was going to Hell because I see no conflict between belief in the Catholic faith and velief in evolution and science (and even pointed to the fact that the official Catholic commentary on the Bible, last massively revised about 40 years ago, specifically discussed evolution when discussing the Creation stories). She also fills my e-mail box with complaints about "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas" and conspiracy theories about how George Bush and the Israelis planned 9/11 or that the US military bombed Monte Cassino during WWII because the military was trying to destroy Catholicism (or something like that).
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Excellent post. But Handel's Messiah isn't much of a punishment. How about Kenny G doing "Silent Night". Now there's a curse!
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Well the war is over and Christmas won. Although now I hear rumblings about a war on New Year's
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Are you crazy? We liberal athiests beat Christmas. We didn't cut and run, we persevered, and now Christams is gone. No more stupid carols and lousy songs today, are there? I think it is all to do with the courageous and inspirational attack on saintly pastries - on Christmas day no less! A stake through the heart of christianity everywhere! http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4562170.stm
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 I bet you a dollar that Christmas will deliver a sneak attack when your leftist liberal pinko cabal of terrorists least expects it, say 363 days from now or something.
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 I first saw something a bit more pornographic. Question - Would god create a new hell for someone who stuck their junk in a Mother Theresa pastry?
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Well, I secretly kinda hope so. I'm all grumpy that Santa didn't bring me the baby jesus buttplug that I asked for, or the jackhammer jesus toy. http://www.divine-interventions.com/baby.php (risque phallic objects inside, and probably some embarassing metatags, but no nudity)
Re: War On Christmas, Part 7 Am I the only one who sees the fetus? Is the modern equivalent of the "Find the Pope in the Pizza Contest"?