The amateur psychologist in me wonders if maybe they are afraid of making a mistake when the stakes are higher. What are the car rides home after a game like?
Definitely could be fear of mistakes, especially if there's a coach or parent watching who harshly criticizes mistakes. Another theory could be that the kid has internalized the "we care more about development than winning" message too much (most clubs preach this early). I think some kids who aren't naturally hyper-competitive just try to "play well" in games, which usually means "don't make mistakes" and ultimately not playing their best. Some kids forget to maintain a fire to win as they focus on "development." The player may fear getting cut at tryouts far more than losing a game.
this is interesting. So you are saying the tryout actually brought out more in her? I would think that a tryout is a more stressful environment than a game for 99% of kids, no? if that’s the case, maybe the kid actually thrives in a pressure scenario and games don’t rise to that? Especially odd for a girl.
Every try out has been with a better team and she has been accepted to multiple teams - different clubs. I'm not her coach but her father is close with me and I've seen two of the tryouts and many games. We discuss this often - he's frustrated but not showing it to her and always supportive. I agree with many - comes down to pressure.
Any parents care to share your college recruiting journey for your kid? Parent of a soph and just trying to gauge this process. THX
Still in it. Going through it right now. DM anything you want. Or ask away. Specifically for my kid. Its a rollercoaster. You will find yourself saying WTF way more than makes sense.
Getting close here as well (freshman). Feels like a moving target with birth year changes, NCAA changes and rumored changes (5-year eligibility, maybe some transfer restrictions but maybe not, pushing back 1st contact date, etc.). All of that out of our control so focus on the controllables - grades, training, general health - and will see what happens!
The birth year change is starting to have real effects. I know of one club who've moved some older kids to the younger team they'll play with next year, playing them in the younger division while waiving the right to post-season tournaments that hinge on it. And another that has formed a separate school-year team playing up in certain tournaments, while they maintain their birth-year teams for other competitions.
There aren't a bunch of adults standing around watching every mistake she makes during training. I don't have any actual data to prove it, but I've always suspected this is a factor.
I feel like there is some missing information here. Has a neutral person asked her about it (as in not the parents). At 12 she could probably articulate some context about what is going on. A few questions that come to mind: Does she actually like soccer and/ or sports? Just because you're good at something, doesn't necessarily mean you like it Is it possible she has some form of social anxiety? 12 is a very vulnerable age....dreaded middle school years. The precarious social dynamics of insecure middle school girls is not for the faint of heart. Could it be she doesn't feel comfortable fitting into social dynamics of established teams? It could be as others have suggested, that she thrives under pressure. Although you would think the higher the team level, the more pressure she would experience. If that truly is the case, could you try having her play in am unfamiliar position to add additional pressure/ challenge?
My daughter is now a junior at a Top 25, D3 program (made a Final 4 recently). The D1 offers she could get were not the right fit (her college is highly competitive academically with a 15% acceptance rate). How you go about the process will depend on your kid’s individual aspirations. But, for what it’s worth to you, this was my daughter’s approach: - Only pursue colleges you would want to go to if you did not play soccer. Serious injuries happen, and most college rosters are 30+ players. Your kid may want to ask: “do I want to be at this place if I sustain a major injury and have to medically retire?” And, “will I be happy here if I don’t play much, or don’t play at all?” (college benches are filled with former ECNL and GA starters, and 5-10 new players come in every year). - It takes a ton of effort to get coaches to respond to the player’s outreach, and even more effort to keep the momentum going. Think hundreds of emails, follow ups, and numerous Zooms/phone calls once there is a mutual interest with multiple schools in play. Your kid has to put in the work, which is challenging with everything else they have on their plate. - Most coaches will send all players who reach out to them invites to their on campus ID clinics. Don’t go unless: A) the coach has watched your kid’s highlight video, and given detailed, mostly positive feedback, or B) the coach saw your kid play at a showcase tournament and provided mostly positive feedback. These ID clinics are money makers to augment the college coach’s operating budget. My daughter attended one ID clinic with about 75 players and the head coach told her that they were only closely evaluating my daughter and two other players who were already on their radar. If the ID clinic is at a local college, or can be a day trip, or only one overnight, it may be worth the expense. But know that the coaches have a short list of players they are giving a close look, so your kid will have to really show to get their attention. - Later in the process (early junior year) my daughter had four schools where there was a strong mutual interest. We made the strategic decision to go all-in pursuing these schools. She did 2-3 ID clinics at all four schools, with three of the four schools requiring out of town flights. She did official visits at all of them (met with coaches and players, had meals with players, toured the athletic facilities, sat in on classes, etc.) At the end of the day my daughter had two offers junior year, and was likely to have gotten two more had she not committed when she did. Note: With all of the changes happening in college sports, try to talk with the parents of players who recently committed. The rule of thumb for my class of 2023 daughter was: For D1 Power 4 and even mid majors you ideally wanted to verbally commit no later than January or February of junior year before spots and the money dried up. The top players, or players who didn’t want to wait for something better to come along, committed as early as August or September of junior year. Good luck!
Above is a critique of an independent soccer trainer I posted a couple months ago. I still get this coach in my insta feed and am pleased to see that he's taking a much more cautious approach. The plyo boxes are still being used but the kids are NOT in cleats, also the boxes often appear to be padded vinyl wrapped versions, instead of the plywood type. The narcissist in me would love to think someone saw my original post and spoke up, but maybe common sense simply prevailed. Either way kudos to Lucas for making an adjustment.
Does anyone have any further intel on the girl academy U11/U12 platform that was announced? Do we know which teams from Chicago will play in that and how the format will work? Seems like a very exciting opportunity for clubs.
Seems a bit young, no? I know that teams that age will play a couple friendlies across the Midwest and that’s been fun. I’m not sure doing league games on that type of travel schedule is a smart move though. The regular state leagues still have decent competition. Maybe the thought is it could get girls to join GA clubs earlier but I don’t know.