It's heartwarming to read the last few posts where spouses/girlfriends are watching your games since some tell me that they officiate on weekends to stay away from their wives.
My parents and wife only watched me referee and play once in 2010(at the age of 66). With 2 other guys, we coached the local club team to the U19 State Cup in 85. 25 years later, the group got together on July 4. We split the alumni up into two teams, and another coach and I refereed the first half. We decided we could play without referees, so I played the second half. My wife has watched a lot of our kids and grandkids games, but that was the only time my wife or parents saw me play or referee.
When my daughter played U17 I had to step in once and center one of her games. The game was uneventful. Afterwards as I was crossing the field to where my wife was she started loudly heckling me telling me I was a lousy ref and missed so many calls. Parents of the opposing team were walking by and they looked horrified until I said "Well dear next time you get to do it then" and kissed her.
A ref friend of mine finally had his fiancée attend a game a year or so ago. It was a girls high school game with two religious schools. Then right in front of his fiancée, one of the girls called the other girl a c-t. Fiancée asked him if this was normal for his games. We did that a few times in breaks we had with other ref friends doing games when spectators were getting rowdy back in our younger days. We would just loudly yell the most obnoxiously wrong things to drown out the parents, like yelling for penalties in the middle of the field, GK/CK on throw ins, etc. We were complete idiots but it did lead to the parents stopping yelling, like they got the hint that we were mocking them
I'm back from a successful USASA Region III Championships. I worked 3 games, 2 games had an AR on as my national coach, refreshed friendships, and I got to interact with a bunch of other national coaches. One of the national coaches watched a bit of a game I was on and was impressed with how I did and told my assigned coach who let me know. No missed KMIs, survived 33 minutes with a broken microphone ([shouts] "I'll talk louder."), and was asked advice unprompted on how to handle a situation by someone I consider a better referee. Now back to the summer busy season where I have a game; Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Monday.
Somehow, this triggers memories of a women's league game I was assigned. The captain and team manager of one of the teams is the wife of a fellow referee. Our kids were going to the same high school as well. She and her husband are both great people and BIG time lawyers. She was a fanatic player. So I'm there before the game. Her husband and the husband of another player were also there, and the two of them are sitting in the stands behind the bench, making comments about the players on their wives team. She turns to me, knowing that I know both of them and many of the players, and says, "Ref, isn't there something you can do about them?" I replied "If you can't do anything about him, there certainly isn't anything I can do!" That set of raucous laughter from the two guys. It should be noted at this point that she is one of the top divorce lawyers in the metro area.
Going under "Best Stories" because it makes me happy, but the GEICO commercial that is showing right now about the fans talking to the ref over comms makes me smile. That is all. Remember: Commercials are NOT reality. Cheers, Mi3ke
My first (Southern) Regionals comes to a close after 7 long days involving 4am wake-ups for 7am kick-offs. 50min drives to complexes from the hotel. Food at sporadic moments and generally got to see Tampa after the games. I'm grateful for the opportunity to have been able to represent my state and learned so much about how I referee and hold the flag. Met a lot of PRO referees and gleaned a lot of knowledge from the likes of Chris Penso, Mark Kadlecik, Alyssa Nichols, Matt Thompson, Arturo Angeles and so many more. My personal mentor, Kevin Klinger, was a trove of knowledge and they were all just generally good, kind people who want to see you succeed and achieve your goals. Somehow, my knockout games were QF: U18B AR1 and SEMI: U18B AR1. Back-to-back U18B AR1. Not sure how that happened considering I didn't get Top AR but I will take it as I saw some of the best action in youth tournaments I've seen in awhile. (Believe me, I didn't think I was a Top AR! There were so many amazing referees out there.) I came in with zero expectations. I was here to learn, absorb, officiate and watch other officials, and it ended up being so much more and a memory I will treasure for a lifetime.
Great to read @gaolin and congratulations!! Keeping in line with the trend, I recently had the opportunity to referee a match where my fiance and her parents were able to come out to watch. I think it was her parents' first time ever watching a competitive soccer match live (not counting the local rec park district games that they took their children to). The conversation/debrief over dinner afterwards was really enjoyable, and I think they have a better appreciation for why I love the beautiful game and why I choose to referee as a hobby.
I attended the Midwest Regional. Championships in Overland Park, KS last month. This was my 18th year overall, and my 7th year as a referee mentor. I was fortunate this year to be named the Rich Grady Mentor of the Year. This is an amazing honor that I was extremely overwhelmed to receive.
I did a game at state cup this year that coincidentally included the son of a referee who I first met years back when I was new and quite frankly not that good... I learned quite a bit from both his teachings and just from watching him. The game went incredibly well. First off, great game. Went the full distance and was a very dramatic finish. Secondly, no one walked out talking about me. I gave appropriate cautions while allowing play to flow. It's a great feeling doing that in front of a mentor
When I say the game went the "full distance" I guess I should add that a good referee doesn't allow the game to go to extra time, let alone kicks from the mark. I am now realizing I still have a lot to learn
My first 'best-story' was going to be about my two weeks in Germany and England. Now, it is that I have power back on after about 23 hours. Last night my neighbor asked if I wanted to plug into his generator to power my fridge. Thanks to him I was able to save everything in the fridge. I'm suppose to have an USL-2 game tomorrow. Don't know if that'll happen which sucks because that was suppose to be my readjustment post vacation before a much harder game Saturday.
In my experience, nothing good ever happens when you have to add additional time whether it’s extra time or stoppage time!
One of my favorite things about refereeing is crossing over with people who are on a vastly different level than you. I had the middle for this particular USL-2 game that was Dayton Ref's "much easier" warmup game, while it's comfortably the highest level I have ever refereed. I've dabbled in lots of different hobbies and jobs in my life and refereeing is the only thing I've ever experienced where people at the top (or near the top) of the industry are so incredibly warm, welcoming, and happy to share their knowledge with people starting to climb. I'm posting in Best Stories because my USL-2 centers last summer felt like drinking from a fire hose and today I actually felt competent to be in the middle - thanks in large part to a stellar AR1!
Ah man, I know that feel. Have experienced that a couple times in my career. Took some time for me to feel comfortable when I was in my early 20s (couldn't grow a mustache then; I still can't, but I couldn't then either) and started to get ethnic adult center referee assignments. Congratulations on reaching that feeling, especially at a level as high as USL-2!!
It’s funny how we use borderline offensive terms like this “ethnic leagues” but we all know what we’re talking about. Imagine telling some non-refs you know about your game “Yeah I got this ethnic league assignment and it was pretty tough, you know how those ethnics are”
Not sure about other places, but in the DC area, "ethnic" leagues can be anything from Salvadoran to Armenian to Afghan. I recall there was one night a week at an indoor soccerplex in which Somalia was the most common place of origin for the players. The US also had a long-standing debate about the merits of giving teams ethnic names. The ASL in its years in the relative wilderness had the Brooklyn Italians, Brooklyn Hakoah, Irish-Americans, New Brunswick Hungarian, and the Philadelphia Ukrainians.
Yes and the fact that ethnic basically can mean any non-white team makes it even funnier. Team could be any African country, Asian, a ton of Hispanic/Central/South American, Middle Eastern. Basically like "you know how those 'ethnics' play, unlike the white teams". Hope it's not crossing a line here, I definitely know what he means, I feel the same way when dealing with teams that are all from one country/region so I'm guilty of it too, it's just hilarious how we say it.
Like @Beau Dure , around here the "ethnic leagues" mean that the teams are composed (largely. not exclusively) of players who immigrated from, or are descended from people who immigrated from some country/region. The German team. The Nigerian team. The Polish team. The Croatian team. The Lebanese team. The Korean team. You jumping to conclusions that it means "non-white" risks a sprained ankle.
Yes, exactly. Where I'm from, we have ethnic teams of the following nationalities: Greeks, Nigerians, Poles, Bulgarians, Ukrainians, Lithuanians, Japanese, Croatians, Serbs, Mexicans (and various regions within Mexico), Peruvians, Hungarians, and "Assyrians." We also have all sorts of teams from south and central America, but there also is an unaffiliated hispanic league so less of their players play in the affiliated adult leagues under one national identity.
This reminds me of the time that a couple of Middle Eastern guys came into the state office to renew their player cards. They were complaining about the referees in their largely Hispanic Parks Dept. league (USSF affiliated.) "They come out there saying something about Allah, like they are mocking us, but we are all Christians!" The woman in the office had to gently tell them that the referees weren't saying "Allah." They were saying "hola." Only in America do Iraqis have to speak Spanish in order to play soccer. Or the men's league game I was assigned, solo, with a team that was on their last chance with the league. I get out there and it's all blue collar Irish immigrants, with their wives and kids. They even had tricolor corner flags and, guess what, they were sponsored by a pub. They were in trouble with the league because they simply couldn't speak without putting 'fooking' somewhere in the sentence. Apparently, other referees had been giving out yellow cards like fooking confetti for using that word. I've done teams that were all, or almost all, Bosnians, Germans, Koreans, Vietnamese, Peruvians, various states in Mexico, Guatemalans and probably some others that I don't remember. I was once doing a game with a team that was largely Bosnians. As I'm checking player cards against the roster, there's a player with the name Juan Hernandez. I said, "Hummm. Must be from the southern part of Bosnia." The players thought that was hilarious. The challenge for us, as referees, is to understand how the players want to play. An 'ethnic' team is more likely to have a common attitude about things, which can actually make it easier to manage their games. Everybody is pretty much on the same page about things like what is contact that should be considered a foul, or a foul and a card. Referee's nightmare: Ireland v Mexico. What upsets one team's players is no big deal to the other guys and vice versa. Cf. shirt pulls and slide tackles.
This is basically turning into the scene from Tropic Thunder. "What do you mean you people?" What do YOU mean YOU people?"