agreed. Five minutes after that, following a foul called by my AR2 on a challenge right in front of him, he pops a flag and start waving me over. Before I can close to a reasonable distance, he hollers "White number 18 needs to be sent off for cussing at me!" loudly enough for all parents and players to hear (player said "pinche arbitro pendejo" to my natively Spanish speaking AR2). Thank you very much AR2 for removing my ability to manage this situation, here's your AL red card number 18. Why manage this? Idk why we let youth players talk to us like they’re adults. What does your credibility look like with a 16 year old telling you that? Or your assistant especially if it was that loud?
Google Translate tells me your AR2 was called a “f***ing a**h***”. No need to manage that one. OFFINABUS Exhibit A, and it’s not even a debate.
Caught some of the game before mine today, and a parent was literally yelling from one end line (ref let them stand there because it was shady) to argue a call at the other, and it wasn't the first thing he yelled. I went to talk with him, and it didn't go well. I will give myself one point for restraint, though -- when he trotted out the "I used to play semipro ball," I didn't mention how many books I've written or how many years I've covered the sport (or how many times I've passed a certification exam, which would of course be more relevant). Instead, I regaled him with the story of Efan Ekoku not comprehending the term "second-to-last defender" during World Cup commentary. Probably not a worthwhile conversation in the first place, though. Wound up doing my shortest ref stint ever. They needed someone to pick up one 60-minute U-12 game, and the assignor was so grateful that I grabbed it. Then we had to call it five minutes into the second half due to lightning, so I basically had one pregame argument and then 35 minutes of mismatch. No deed goes unpunished.
Colorado Soccer It is with heavy hearts that we share the news of the passing of one of our own, Ben Chouaf. He was a referee for 28 years, including 10 years as a National Referee/Assistant Referee as well as a Regional Assessor. He was a mentor, coach, and supporter for so many up-and-coming referees. Ben’s influence in Colorado Soccer was substantial. A well-known presence on the fields in Fort Collins and beyond. There are so many referees, players, and coaches today who benefitted from Ben’s friendship, guidance and support.
Parent - "I used to play semipro soccer." Me (to myself) - 1) So you basically played glorified adult beer league. 2) So you just confirmed you have no clue about the Laws of the Game.
I agree and it's by far my biggest frustration with the mid-level youth leagues in Houston ... if you officiate them as you should, you'll abandon every other match and rapidly stop getting games to work. I'm more strict about abusive language than the vast majority of guys I ref with, and in leagues with more professional standards I have no issue pulling the red for things like that.
Then abandon them. Talked to Rick Eddy tonight and he said that was the #1 thing. Put your foot down on it.
I carded a coach last night. College game 1-0 in the 78th minute. The losing coach was arguing about an opponent's throw-in location in front of his bench, meaning that it was around 80 yards from that team's goal. Sub happens and the throw-in occurs where the player runs up the line about 5-7 yards and releases the ball. The coach goes ballistic. I guess he wanted it right on that blade of grass. I caution him with no hesitation without saying a word. He continues to yell at me asking for an explanation. I don't usually get wound up but I turned and yelled back at him "Have a seat and close your mouth right now!" Multiple mouths on both teams drop open like they've seen a ghost. He says "You can't yell at me" and I respond "The hell I can't. You just yelled at me. You can dish it but can't take it now?" We keep playing and the game ends. My crew meets me afterward for the customary handshake/fistbump with the teams. The entire losing team fistbumps the referee crew. I even stop the best player that night and tell her she played a great game. Ironically, there was no losing coach in the handshake line. Guess that medicine he got back from me didn't taste too good
This is how it works. Coaches yell at you 60 yards away from you and disrespect the hell out of you, but if you so much as raise your voice to them in response, suddenly they're the poor innocent victim and you're the disrespectful a-h and you'll get reported. I'm sure it's not a regular thing for you to do, but I would advise against ever yelling towards coaches like that. Hell, this even happens to me with players, especially adult players in my adult games I solo. They yell disagreement with an (usually) offside call/no-call, I will explain out loud why I made the call I made, and then they'll say that I'm being too sensitive and why am I yelling at them when I'm not yelling at all, I'm merely explaining loudly so everyone can hear.
I had one game last night and five games today. We've got a few refs who want to work tons of games because they need the money, and a lot of refs who get stuck with tons of games because there's no one else. I had a 7 pm center last night and a 6 pm center tonight, and my ARs were barely moving because they were on their fourth or fifth game of the day. (I like to think I was still moving pretty well; I do enough running that I'd fancy my chances in a mile or a 5K race against any other refs in my city. FWIW I'm at 17.4 miles for the day.) It seems like we've been ridiculously shorthanded this fall, in a way that we normally aren't during club season. And the number of games doesn't seem like it's any higher than it has been previous years. Usually U12 and under friendlies are solo, but we've had a ton of older games that we've run as duals (yes, I know, spare me the speeches) because some games would otherwise go uncovered, or we needed to put three refs on a league game. I guess some of it has been people not being able to handle the heat, maybe some has been COVID cases. It also seems like a lot of youth teams have been shockingly shorthanded. One U19B team this morning had no subs. A U15G team had two subs and one more injured player on the bench. I don't know how much of it is on our assignor, and how much is on the club making last-minute changes. There are definitely other refs out there. but I don't know how many weren't available or were reffing elsewhere. And to top it off, the scores of my games: 10-0, 7-2, 5-1, 8-4, 8-0, and 4-0. I guess that's a blessing because it meant any close calls we missed due to exhaustion didn't really matter to the final result.
If there's a youth league shorthanded and I could do games solo while getting CR+AR rate, I'll take those and prefer them to even doing duals. Solo just throw offside in the trash, roam around the field, focus more on player safety, and quick draw dissent cards on coaches, players, and get prepared to toss dissenting spectators.
I'll agree that I'd want to be called over to be told what was said to the assistant. If an assistant tells you that the language was abusive and you don't send off the player, nothing good will happen going forward. Everyone is likely to be abused more because the standard for AL has been set so high. You might as well not have an assistant on that side. I've had to take input from assistants I don't trust or that I believe, without proof, that they are flat out wrong, but I do it to support the team and manage the game. We are a team and you had better believe that I would take it personally if a referee didn't back me up when a 15 year old told me to 'f off'. When did the game end? Doing the math, it would seem that the game should have ended early (2CT, AL, DOGSO, AL, AL). "Coach, technical area decorum is a point of emphasis. Please behave appropriately"
Game ended with 7 players - I may have miscounted in my story telling. Four reds total. Regardless, the flurry of dismissals happened with about 2 minutes left on the clock and by the time the players got set for a restart it was full time. The thing is - I have never and will never not back an AR if they tell me they've been abused. Two factors in play here: first, this particular AR has a bit of a reputation for looking for trouble and second, it was the mechanics that I disapproved of. If it turns out that the player had hit him with a "no freaking way, ref" or something that doesn't rise to AL then my hands are already tied thanks to his shouting... Hardly assisting vs insisting.
Dove for a ball in MBB Sunday afternoon, ball hit the post and then ricocheted, hard, into the back of my head. I was down (but not out) for a bit, got myself together and stayed in the game. After the game, felt mild encircling headache, yesterday morning felt out of it, headache, little photo-sensitive. Urgent care for assessment, ER for CT (negative for bleeding), I'm feet up for at least a week, playing and reffing. Woulda sat a kid, shoulda sat myself. Everybody keep this in mind both ways--whether you are reffing the afflicted, or are afflicted yourself, be smart and be cautious with headshots of any kind. Symptoms are mild thankfully, so I'm treating this as a lightly-burned fingertip from touching the damned stove. Just don't get burned, guys.
When playing with others, I think it is important to look after one another. Getting hit on the head affects one’s judgment, making it harder to make the right decision.
Agreed and I should have added that guys on both sides not only asked if I was okay (I mean that's just natural) but also did I think I should come out. On reflection I'm going to keep in mind that a useful thing to say might be something like "that's the knock talking, let's get you out for starters so you don't make a bad decision." That's a draft but I feel/hope like that might have sunk in.
Clear proof why you, as the referee, do not let the possibly injured player make the decision about whether they can/should stay in the game. Their natural, default answer is going to be "Oh, I'm okay." When in doubt, sit 'em out. Just last night, small college women's game, two defenders clashed heads and both had to be sent for an evaluation. Neither returned.
Yes and to clarify I was thinking of this advice/approach in a MBB teammate context. No if I'm reffing there's nothing for anybody else to decide.
This is not that different from the MBB game I was doing, solo. Keeper makes an easy standing save using both hands. He then says, "Ref, come here." What? This is.....unusual. I go towards him and he says, "Ref, my heart is racing and I can't get it to slow down." OMG!!! Anybody know the number for 911??? I whistle to officially stop the game, since he was still holding the ball. Some of his teammates took him over to the bench. Well, no actual bench, just the place where they'd left their bags. Their one sub came in to take his place and they left the keeper laying there on his back with his feet on his bag. "Yeah, this happens to him some times." Seemed pretty cold to me, to just leave their teammate there by himself, as we resumed the game. He came back in for the second half.
Nor the coach. U10G game. Player takes a rocket shot to the head. I ask the player if she is OK. Coach said "She's fine." "Coach, I'm asking her." "I'm her father and I say she's fine." "Coach, when you take a rocket shot to the head, I'll ask you. Right now, I'm asking her."
Just yesterday, JV girls game, player takes a shot right to the head from less than 10 yards away. Hard enough a shot that it literally lifted her off her feet. My dual partner goes to her and, of course, she says she's fine. He then asks her what the score is. Confusion, "Ah.....I'm not sure." This happened fairly close to her team's bench, so he calls on the coach, who subs for her and starts asking her some other questions, which she is not able to answer. She did not return to the game.
Had one of the dumber 2CTs I’ve seen in a long time tonight. I was AR2 for a boys’ varsity game. Center gives a player a dissent yellow in the 1st half. His team is clearly in control of the game, up 4-1 at half. Mid way through second half, same player has a sloppy foul. Ref calls him over, reminds him he’s on a yellow and tells him to watch it. In fact, center ends up talking to him a second time in that half. By then, even his teammates are telling him to cool it. Less than 2 minutes left in the game, up 6-1, he ends up with a bad tackle from behind and earns the second yellow. I think the center probably gave him more leeway than he should have and the kid just didn’t get it. Why the coach still has him in the game as well (he was their starting center midfielder), I have no idea. Now he’s out for his next game.
To be fair dissent plus reckless isn't really a dumb 2CT, maybe for the dissent aspect since that's one of the "cheap" YCs I have three competitors for the dumbest 2CTs I've ever given out 1. U17B NPL captain, pulled him aside and warned him after his fifth player (including himself) got a caution, told him maybe he wants to talk to his guys to calm down. Less than two minutes later, he stands DIRECTLY on the corner arc to delay an opponent's CK and gets his 2CT. 2. U15B NPL, one of the top teams in the state/country. First YC for simulation after the defender slides to clear the ball over the end line for a CK. Second YC for getting minor shirt tug facing away from goal and pushes the opponent, resulting in someone running over and shoving him to the ground. That guy got a VC RC, and of course I had to give him a YC for instigating that. 3. Same game, same team, kid on a YC who decided to keep running to get the ball for the opponent to make them throw in quicker, and the fourth of fifth time, ran through the opponent's back to get the ball, 10 yards off the field of play.
Did you miss the part about there being 2 minutes left in the game and it being 6-1. Yeah, that’s really dumb to make a reckless tackle from behind.