you're 100% correct. Probably the most honest among us about his games. Willing to bring things up to improve himself
Did I ever mention the coach who told me I'd ruined a U9 girl's day when I gave her a yellow for PI? I'd have taken the criticism more seriously if he had been watching his game instead of the boys' game on the next field. Maybe he would've seen the escalating warnings ...
Well, as long as you only ruined her day..... Eight year olds don't remember what they had for breakfast that day. And yellow cards don't go on their 'permanent record.'
Maybe avoiding a fight? I know quite a few small ones that will get whacked only so many times before grabbing the offender and wrasslin'.
You can avoid that simply by your presence at that age. There is a reason many leagues do not allow / recommend against showing cards for these ages. The players simply do not understand and will break down crying in the middle of the field.
On a regular basis, I see High School girls cry on the field after receiving a card. Does that mean that we shouldn’t show cards at that age either?
That you don’t understand the emotional side of teenage girls and why one might cry at that age vs a 9 year old says more about you than whether or not cards are appropriate at a given age.
Keeping her from injuring someone? Some of her opponents were already getting a little banged up. And her coach has it within his power to make her day better. He didn't. He just yelled at me, which ruined my day. (Well, not really.)
This to me is a subject with no clear answers. I do like the AYSO vision that cautions can be given at the younger ages without the public display of the cards—it is a conversation with the coach and the player. IMHO, at 10U and below, regardless of whether the competition expects a card to be shown, there should be more than one clear conversion the player about being more careful and a clear conversation with the coach including the admonition that th coach talk to the player before reaching the stage of thinking about an actual caution.
I once almost gave a yellow card to a U8 boy at some play day a few years back. He kept running right through the other kids. After the 6th or 7th time and multiple warnings I told him in front of the parents "I don't care if you're 7 years old, I'm giving you a yellow next time you do it." Also last year I gave a U10 kid a yellow card that was 100% a violent conduct red card for kicking a kid in the calf with his studs in angry/crying after he lost the ball and fell down. The other coach was yelling about how uncalled for his action was. I then told him to get up and come to the coach and I told the coach (who is one of my ref assignors) to not bring him in for the rest of the game.
At a high school clinic, Paul Stanton told a story about refereeing a U8 game, where a player used the F word. He asked the player if he wanted a red card. The player said "no." So he walked the player to the kid's grandfather, who Paul was friends with. The kid kept his eyes on the ground the whole walk. When he got to the touch line, looked up, and saw his grandfather, he said "Ref, I'll take that red card now."
Dropping a word to the coach would indeed be a good idea. Maybe he'd stop watching the boys game for a second and see how his player may not be unsportsmanlike but is persistently reckless and hasn't dialed it down despite leaving a trail of downed kids behind her.
A kid plays keeper for a local varsity high school. He is very good and plays as the GK on a local ECNL club as well. However, his behavior towards the referees is intolerable. He yells across the field all game about wanting a foul any time his players are touched. He will get talked to by the ref but usually still does it to some extent. He will sometimes attend the girls varsity home games and I'm pretty sure it's him yelling at the ref from the crowd as well as also trash talking opponents. Last week, a ref I know seems to be buddy-buddy with him before the game, knows his name, etc., ref acts like he knows this kid and all will be fine, then he sits in the crowd in the varsity girls game heckling this same center ref by name. I don't even know how to go about dealing with this. I did a game of his earlier this month and on his first heckling me I went to him and told him I know his game of talking and to cut the crap or see what happens, and he pretty much stopped. But I'm talking about the more overarching behavioral problem.
Some thoughts from an old grumpy guy coming back after the COVID break: without consequences, he won't change. When you're the referee on his game, give him the warning (as you did), but don't tolerate him stopping "pretty much". The next, even half-hearted public complaint gets a yellow card. It's high school, so the clock is stopped, so the rest of the players don't lose any time. You have to talk to the coach in HS after a card, so let the coach know you won't tolerate any more of it. Now, the onus is on both the GK and coach. If the GK continues, give him the second yellow, then show a red card and send him off (or whatever the term is in HS!). Be prepared for a teammate to take up the GK's dissent duties, and card it immediately, as the precedent has been set. When you're the referee on the girls game, and you can hear and identify him, stop the game and have him removed. Do not restart until he out of sight and sound. Neither you, nor the opponents, get paid enough to take that crap from a teenager. When you're the AR in either situation, explain the kid's behavior to the ref in the pregame and suggest these actions.
Since even the Keeper comes out for a YC in High School, maybe let the coach know after you have given the GK his one verbal warning. You could probably do this with eye contact and gestures, not having to run all the way over, -- unless that is convenient.
I partially agree. I think there are too many referees who want to move up for the ego boost associated with a badge with more letters, but who aren't willing to "do the work" necessary when nobody's around watching. For the most part, you can't fake fitness. You'll get exposed at the fitness test if you have been slacking on training. If you're commenting about a recent fitness test you have observed, I'd wonder why there was a test held so recently after the holiday season? Seems like a recipe for an artificially inflated fail rate. It's the offseason. Lots of referees take December off to reset, recharge emotionally, and travel/spend time with the family. Those referees would have a limited 2-3 week window to "build back" fitness for a mid-January test and are probably in the worst shape they'll be in for the entire year. A test in early March, before the heavier slate of spring games, makes much more sense from a fitness-planning perspective. I'm aware that nationals and PRO refs complete their fitness tests in December and January for logistical purposes, but that's a more limited exception. I expect those referees to be more cognizant of their training habits during the holidays/offseason anyway.
Preaching to the choir, but the formal fitness should be just another time one runs the fitness test. I assume you passed and that congratulations are in order.
I just finished running a 180 team tourney. I assigned roughly 250 games on 17 fields, half small sided solo and half full field 3 man. It never ceases to amaze me the kind of idiocy that can happen. 1. An AR somehow never made it to a field so the 2 remaining jokers on a full crew decided to dual it. I swear it happens every year. 2. A very seasoned ref on a solo decided the fastest and most efficient way to handle Mr. BadDad was to show him a RC and send him off. I guess all the constant barage of "we do not send off parents, have the coach deal with them" went in one ear and out the other. Mind you, it was U11. But Mr. BadDad was not to be outdone, because... 3. In a U10 match, Mr BadDad2 showed up to the party. Ball out off Yellow, throw to Red on the parents touchline. Mr. BadDad2, being a stalwart parent and supporter of Team Yellow, decided to kick the ball away from the Red player to prevent little Johnny from throwing the ball in. Did I mention this was 9 year olds? Fortunately the Referee was paying attention in Referee class because he did go to the coach to send Mr. BadDad2 to his car. But not quick enough for him to get into a fight with another dad from Team Red, who took exception to Mr. BadDad2's actions. Did I mention these were 9 year old kids?
The test was yesterday. I passed the National Referee and watched/cheered the Regional Referee/National Women's Referee. As @mathguy ref points out, it isn't really the off season. Private HS started in November, public HS started in December and youth tournaments have started already. Additionally, there is two tests in the fall on opposite sides of the state near the end of the season.
I know I've posted this before (if you remember it, you can just hit delete) but the first year of the interval test was my daughter's first year of National camp. She and another local went to a local high school track and I administered the test that they were gong to have to take at camp. They both passed, no problem. Fast forward to camp. They were running the test in groups of six. Virtually none of them had tried the test before hand. In practical terms, that meant that they had no idea about the pace required during each run. In the first group of six, only one referee passed the test. My daughter and our friend both passed with flying colors. The passing rate was under 50% that year. The next year, there was no physical at National camp. They went out and played a 90 minute game.
I had to jump a fence to practice this year because the two schools I've done it at in the past were having turf installed inside the track and had most of the track covered with protective mats but the next closest had a fence around the field/track. I always practice at least once because the pace difference between the straight and turn is killer although I don't place the 25 and 50 meter cones that make it significantly easier during the real thing.
One year, we had a center decline a USSF tournament game. The other AR told me we were doing a dual. I said "No sir, you can center since you are younger and faster then me. But we are not doing a dual." He pointed to the field behind the benches and said "They are," Sure enough, two refs were doing an NFHS style dual. I stuck to my guns. "See if you can get a club linesman, but USSF says no duals, so we are NOT going to do a dual." Personally, I disagree. We should be allowed to do a dual instead of have a club linesman. But until USSF changes the decision, I will not do a dual. Well, except on the U10 game where the other ref was so new, he allowed a sub after the keeper made a save. The experts...er...parents were ready to kill him by halftime. So I stepped on the field to help him.