Cincinnati is also spelled 'basically Kentucky.' Weird about Jeahze. Is he really that bad, or is something else going on with him? I remember...
Forget avoiding the spoon. Winning it all this year. Not a doubt in my mind.
You can snag a skid-marked pair of white Ravel Morrisons on ebay for $1.20. Most of that money goes towards the Levien yacht fund though.
Sucks to go into a season feeling this way, but I'm pretty sure this team is going to be garbage again.
A second division would be great. I'm sure we'd immediately fall to the bottom of that one too though, ha! Maybe not, and maybe this is the only...
First time checking in in a while. This team is better than the lackluster dumpster fire Chad Ashton was running out there, but man it is...
I have an idea. Trade Andy "Baby Honduran Messi" Najar and Pines for the actual Messi. Step 2, championship.
Pines two goals in two games and this game's Puskas award contender. Just how Kasper planned it.
Counterpoint - this is the best team in the league at managing expectations. They have me thankful they are no longer a complete embarrassment....
What a solid performance. Too many standouts to note. Also - Pines plays like a baby giraffe on the field. Too big, too strong, and too fast to...
Benteke looked like Shaq out there a few times. Just too big and too strong. What a performance!
Rooney not that impressive so far but I'm surprised too that supposedly better quality players is not resulting in better play, for the most part....
A Tim Horton's donut. The catch is you have to eat it with a wooden spoon.
6-1, DC wins. Benteke 3 goals. Club signs Jaime Moreno at halftime and he comes on and scores the final goal.
I swear, Chad Ashton is going to suit up one day and take the field for us. He'll be announced as a gem of a TAM find by Kasper. And speaking of...
Benteke isn't carrying his weight or his salary if he doesn't put away the clear chances he gets. As one of the highest paid guys in MLS, he...
For the pure entertainment value, I kind of hope it all goes down like this. It's the kind of story you would tell your friends/kids/grandkids...
I wish I had 3 hands to give this post more than 2 thumbs up. Levien and Kaplan are some damn vultures and if MLS were a big boy league, they'd...
Santos with the classic DC United trifecta of old, small, and slow. Benteke needed some help up front. Fountas instead of Robertha would have...
Long way to go, but this does not look like a repeat winner for the spoon. Add in a hopefully still dynamic taxi, one more guy after they give...
I've fallen for the hype machine again. Damn you Kaspevien you turd. Will be shelling out for Apple TV and expecting to at least challenge for...
I hope they turn Ashton into DC United's version of Baghdad Bob. Trot him out on Tik Tok and Instagram. Is there a better spokesman for this...
It's always a fine line, cheering for the players but rooting against the front office and the owners. These owners are Dan Snyder-like, in...
The public doesn't care enough about DC United for this to be a thing in the press. DC United's best player was accused of dropping the n word...
I'm fine with the 'future is now' approach. Watching some of the Ashton-led games left a 'future is never' taste in my mouth, which was not great.