Once upon a midnight dreary, while I posted weak and weary, reading many a quaint and curious thread of forgotten football lore, While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping, As of some one gently typing, typing that the US was poor. `'Tis a troll,' I muttered, `posting about Altidore - Saying he will never score.' Ah, distinctly I remember it was the bleak Big Soccer, Where each player earned a thread, but few there did prosper. Eagerly I wished the morrow; - vainly I had sought to borrow From the threads surcease of sorrow - sorrow for the weak back four - For it was the rare and radiant game which the defense played against Spain- Legendary here for evermore. And the sad uncertain positioning of each left fullback, Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before; So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating `'Tis some troll posting on us everyone will score - Some English troll posting that on us they will score; - This it is, and nothing more,' Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer, `Sir,' typed I, `or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore; But the fact is I was napping, and so loudly you came posting, And so loudly you came posting, posting about Altidore, This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word, `score!' Merely this and nothing more. Deep past that group stage peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, Doubting, but still dreaming dreams no fan dared to dream before; Further through the tourney turning, all the games earning, earning. Then the silence was broken, and the darkness gave up its token, And the crowd joined their voices, shouted from the champion’s shore' Quoth Donovan, `I will SCORE!'
You deserve great rep [added my few pence to that till]. KZ Man, I'd like to think that Edgar would take a swig or two in your honor.
Thank you (and everyone) for the kind words (and rep). Edgar would need those drinks after seeing how I twisted his message of gloom to a positive ending.
+1 That is sheer genius, KZ man, and I am in awe of your brilliance!!! Surely this will go down in bigsoccer legend as one of the best posts ever. Although it will pale in comparison to your work, I'll try my hand at a last stanza: And the English troll, always criping, still is typing, still is typing About how our boy Altidore will never score, And his rantings have all the seeming of a demon's that is screaming, And the Brits behind him streaming pump him up even larger than before; And my soul from out his blather that lies floating about Altidore Shall be lifted - nevermore!
Very well written. You sir are the man. I hope this finds its way to the USMNT in South Africa. The artistic on BigSoccer?! Who'd a thunk it... Oh, and it is still a message of gloom...to those who would face us and meet their doom...