I was wondering if anyone has noticed what teams shake your hand after a match? Is it cultural? Is it taught at an age? Is it some elite teams not others? Is it just the winners and not the losers? Does it happen a lot or not at all? Is it just male not female?
I don't think I've ever discerned a pattern. Winners perhaps more than losers. Sometimes entire teams in a line at the youth level. Random players at adult level. Maybe boys slightly more than girls, but not materially different. I don't do "elite" matches, just district league, HS and Sunday morning men. Men's league matches can be odd: there's generally some guy who has spent 90 minutes making adverse comments about your eyesight and knowledge comes up at the final whistle and says what a good job you did. Probably because you laughed at him rather than showed him a card. Though I did get a keeper thank me once for cautioning him, he acknowledged that he had deserved it and was now sorry.
One thing I'm noticing is that most referees in my area prefer fist bumping to handshakes with the players. We still do handshakes with the coaches and each other. With the spread of H1N1, I see more going to fist bumps. And age, level or sex doesn't seem to make much difference. It probably has more to do with the coaches' view on sportsmanship.
never noticed much of a pattern, except that players / coaches from the winning team are more likely to shake hands with the officials than folks from the losing team. Beyond that, I think some of it boils down to the coach of that particular team -- what does he tell his players to do? Does the team do the same every game, or does the coach tell his players after each game what he wants them to do?
Youth - all plus coaches, because kids expect it, because coaches tell them too. Cultural expectation I think. Premier Youth - all USUALLY plus coaches. At this level if a coach is pissed at you you won't see them, and certain coaches (the serious ones?) don't ever participate. Adult - random approach you (assume you are CR) as game ends. Captains, peacemakers, almost always. Winners more so that loosers. Perps 50/50. Some give just a verbal, some shake hands. Professional - (ok, I've only had 2...) see Adult above. We do the H1N1 Bump around here with the youth for the most part, coaches and adults get a shake. Should we continue to assume that adults actually wash their hands? I don't know based on what I see some places... Ewww!
Surrounded by 30 kids... I do the bump because it is quicker/simpler. Always bump keepers with their gloves on! Careful, they spit!
Years ago when I was still coaching, I deplored the staged, line it up and run through a senseless repetition of "good game, good game, etc..". It was never done that way in my childhood games. I taught my players to genuinely shake the hand of one or two opponents who were near them when the game ended, to never forget to thank the referees, and if there was a particularly gifted opponent who impressed them in some way, to get that guy as well and let him know. They always thanked their supporters as well. If you've really connected with male players of foreign upbringing, you may get more contact than just a handshake. Hugs, hands on head, I've even been kissed on the cheek by a Turkish player. I once got a really deep bow of respect from one Japanese gentleman. That was cool. I do bumps with younger players for sanitary reasons if they come at me in a line, but I really prefer random acts of genuine interaction. Those always get a shake. And the next thing on the agenda is the small bottle of hand sanitizer in the gear bag before I touch anything else.
I never thought of the hand sanitizer, but that seems like a good idea! It seems like it's usually up to the coach. I mostly work U13-U17. I recently had a game with a bunch of catty U14 girls who came out to the center circle (presumably instructed to do so) and then went back to the bench without shaking hands.
hello, ref. for me, it usually just depends on how far away you are... unless you were a really good ref, in which case, i'll at least give you a verbal. (it's only fair to acknowledge your good efforts--especially when some of you refs acknowledge mine.)
During the summer season, our governing body decided (H1N1 thing again) to tell the players NOT to shake hands.... at any level, not each other, the refs... everybody. I was CR at my first game at one away tournament... I was doing the pregame with the captains and they looked confused. I just said, touch fists, elbows... even touch feet. They all got a "kick" out of this, and for the rest of the tournament, it caught on. I'm in agreement with almost everyone else.... the younger kids.. expect the lineup (I high five)... HS and above, usually just the captains, coaches and maybe a couple of others.
I only do adult games, but it's usually fairly incidental. If you're in close proximity to a player at the final whistle, or you walk past them on your way off the field, they'll shake hands, if not, no special effort. I kind of like that - they pretty much treat you as just another participant. Coaches and captains will usually go out of their way to shake hands with you given that it's their role. If I've carded a player and he's embarrassed about it, he'll sometimes use the opportunity to apologise.
I do the Fist Bump, mainly because I don't want to shake hands with 30+ sweaty kids/adults. That and the disease thing... Pretty much to echo what's been said, winners more than losers (for adult games or tense HS/youth), whoever is nearby (adult). Interestingly, my HS association issued a memo saying that refs should NOT participate in the post-game handshake line and should stand 10 yards away from it to prevent the spread of H1N1... Yeah, like we haven't been running around with the kids for 90 minutes anyway.
In my area, only in the past few years have youth teams started coming over en masse to shake hands with the ref. They didn't used to, and honestly, I could do without it. I've got paperwork to do and/or another game to prepare for... or a cold beverage awaiting me. I don't want to seem like I'm dissing a coach who wants his kids to thank me, but I'll often leave the field during the players' friendship line so I don't have to deal with the rigamarole. They can thank me (or not) if they like when I return the player passes.
I hang around the line when there is a chance of misconduct - say a U16 boys match in our recreational "friendship league" - and so they will frequently come by the ref crew afterwards. A bit ironic that the guys who cause the most trouble and have been bitching and moaning about calls the whole game are the ones most likely to come by and shake my hand!
I know folks have different procedures all over the country, but the handshake line is my crew's last duty before leaving the field. I once had a fight in a u12G's rec line. And the coaches ended up screaming at each other. I always watch the handshake line. You just never know what's going to happen.
Funny thing for me, recently it seems the losing teams have been more apt to shake hands than the winning team. Just did an MRL match where a team got blasted 7-1. Every player from the losing team shook our hands, maybe 4 players from the winning team did.
I understand where you are coming from but I hope you will reconsider especially with younger players. As a youth coach I am trying to teach them respect for the game, the opponent and the officials and let them know we could not play without them. I am also trying to teach them that regardless of what happened during the game, at the end it is "well done, thanks, see you next time" I also think timing is important. Game ends, thank the ref, thank the opponent- then go celebrate or lick your wounds.
I don't disagree (I primarily coach for a living, youth and HS) that respect for the game is paramount. I just don't think the en masse 16-player line is necessary. If the refs are nearby, I will thank them myself when I'm coaching, or have my captains do it. Far more important, IMHO, to show respect during the match--not dissenting, playing cheap, trash talking, etc.
Some players will cry, moan and complain all day just to manipulate the ref into thinking he is only calling the game one way. If it buys him even something stupid like a throw-in later on. That player will usually shake your hand if you keep your composure and dont back down. Its also nice during a tense mens league game to hear one of the older players tell you "relax - you're calling it fair" when things get tense
I find the 18-person lineup to be disingenious. If someone really thinks i did a good job or wants to thank me, they should come up by them-self or with a few other ppl. i doubt any game i do will have all 35some people involved happy with my performance. That said, i will shake the hand of any ref who is halfway decent. Being a goalkeeper, i need any help i can get so i think anything that will put myself in a positive light is good.
It's not necessarily meant to be a sign that they think you did a good job, just that they appreciate you taking time out of your day to come referee their game. Many of our coaches will tell the players exactly that: "I don't care if you're happy with the job the referee did or not, you shake there hand and thank them for being out there with us today"
It's not necessarily meant to be a sign that they think you did a good job, just that they appreciate you taking time out of your day to come referee their game. Many of our coaches will tell the players exactly that: "I don't care if you're happy with the job the referee did or not, you shake there hand and thank them for being out there with us today"