Mark Cuban's twin brother invests billions in MLS!!!

This from the Frisco Frilly:

Mark Cuban's twin brother, Mike Cuban; has taken off the Mike Jeffries mask and announced that he's ready to bring in three new MLS franchises for the year 2005.

Cuban states - "I want to sincerely apologize to the Burn fans for the disguise of being the head coach for the Dallas Burn, Mike Jeffries. It was my intention to garner the faith and hope of Burn fans in order to sink the organization into the depths of despair - only to take the mask off and proclaim - I am the GREATEST of billionaire pranksters, and I will now buy the Burn and take them to the promised land"... "but this was only done to lower the initial buy in cost of the Burn franchise, and it was not done to totally alienate the fan base and hurt anyone's feelings. Besides, I will be all-that-much-more of a hero when I lift the team to a championship!".

Cuban's move can be interpreted, however, that just because someone has a lot of money, it doesn't mean that they have the necessary soccer-savvy needed to grasp what it takes to overcome the obstacle of being the fifth major sport. And just because "that Lamar guy" bought the team before Cuban did - doesn't mean that deep pocket money can't rescue MLS.

But, honestly, who cares what soccer knowledge any of the owners are capable of anyway? It's the money and revenue insurgence that's much needed in order to propagate the sport into a respected MAJOR sport.

Cuban went on to say that "he's had so much fun in playing with fans hopes and emotions, that he's not concerned that he'll spend most of his billions on promotions with no guaranteed reward".


Welcome to Burn-land, all ye who dare enter. Please, go out and buy the best microscope you can find on the market today, because you'll need to have the most help you can possibley get in order to find any joy in this miserable season.