Chants of the Week

Discussion in 'Houston Supporters Clubs' started by Offebacher, Mar 20, 2007.

  1. Cansez

    Cansez Member

    Sep 9, 2007
    Suburbia, Texas
    The chant was "Child Abuse! Child Abuse!"
     
  2. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Not a lot this week, but there is a picture of Ruiz:

    Oh my God I can't believe it, we've never been this good away from home!"
    Leeds fans to the tune of the Kaiser Chiefs' 'Oh My God'. (Robin, England).


    "Are you Tottenham in disguise?"
    Arsenal fans to Sunderland when they went 2-0 up at the Emirates.
    "Are you Tottenham in disguise?"
    Sunderland fans when Arsenal threw away their 2-0 lead. (Harry, UK).

    "Ginger Mourinho!"
    Leicester City fans singing to Gary Megson at Sheffield Wednesday. (Jon, UK).

    [​IMG] And coming on for Northampton...


    "You're supposed to be a gnome!"
    Millwall fans to Northampton's pint-sized full-back Danny Jackman. (Davy McMurray, London).

    "Maradona!"
    Argentine rugby fans getting confused as to which sport their national team is playing during the Rugby World Cup quarter-final against Scotland. (Ben, UK).

    "E-I-E-I-E-I-O - a monkey-hanging you will go."
    Forest fans remind Hartlepool what they are most famous for. It was hilarious - well the Forest fans thought it was. (Mark Ritchie, England).

    "Hey Nicky you're so fine, you're so fine, you're two behind, hey Nicky!"
    Bishops Stortford fans to St Albans goalkeeper Nick Eyre in the FA Cup second qualifying round. (Dan Howes, UK).

    "Gordon for England!" Sunderland fans to their, erm, Scottish goalkeeper, Craig Gordon. (Sexy Boy, England).

    "Does your mother know you're here?"
    Scunthorpe fans to young Norwich supporters. (Danny Oakley, England).

    "Let's pretend we've scored a goal!"
    A chant sung by Bradford City's fans in the closing five minutes of a dire 3-0 loss at home to Accrington Stanley, followed by all participants going absolutely crazy. (Russ Waldron, England).

    "Your ground's too big for you!"
    Peterborough fans at Shrewsbury.
    "That stand's too big for you!"
    Shrewsbury fans hit back at the 200 or so fans in a 2,000 capacity stand! (Sam, UK).

    "Oh Christian Dailly you're a Saint for life.
    Oh Christian Dailly will you s*** my wife?
    Oh Christian Dailly, we want curly hair to-ooo."
    Saints fans' chant for their new centre-back. To the tune of 'I love you Baby'. (Philip Salkeld, Durham).

    "We saw you cry on the telly!"
    Sung when Preston played Southampton, referring to when Gregor Rasiak missed a penalty against us in the play-offs and then promptly cried. (Sam, UK).

    "Can we play you every week?"
    Chorley fans brought out the usual chant when leading 2-0 against Lancaster. The twist being that the fixture is repeated almost every week in October (2nd, 9th, 23rd). (Jan Buxton, UK).

    [​IMG] You can have him!


    "We've got Joey Barton, We've got Joey Barton, la la la la."
    Newcastle fans to Man City fans last Saturday.
    "You've got Joey Barton, You've got Joey Barton, ha ha ha ha!"
    City fans after seeing their side go 3-1 up. (Julie, UK).

    "Take your shoes off if you're crap."
    Sung by Manchester City fans when Newcastle fans started waving their shoes in the air - they soon vanished. (David, England).
    "Sit down, Pinocchio!"
    Spurs fans to Gareth Southgate during recent Carling Cup game with Boro. (Justin Fleming, England).
     
  3. OrangeCajun

    OrangeCajun Member

    Nov 28, 2006
    Cypress, Texas
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    You suck, do you want fries with that?:eek:
     
  4. dustcowpoke

    dustcowpoke Member

    Jan 7, 2006
    Houston, TX
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Those chants are class!!
     
  5. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Euro Edition includes the revival of West Germany:


    "Have you ever seen a salad, number one?"
    Sung by Worthing fans to Hampton & Richmond goalkeeper during their FA Cup third round qualifying defeat. (Brad, Worthing).

    "Keeper's on a hat-trick, keeper's on a hat-trick, la la la la..."
    Torquay fans to Stevenage goalie Alan Julian after he scored two own goals in Torquay's 4-2 win. (Kevin, England).

    [​IMG] Bill 'The Body' Oddie


    "Bill Oddie, Bill Oddie, Rub your beard all over my body! Bill Oddie, Bill Oddie..."
    Reading fans against Derby. (Jake Byrne, England).

    "Who needs Mourinho, we've got Roberto."
    Swansea fans after going top of the league under Roberto Martinez. (Tom H, Wales).
    "Switzerland are you listening? Austria are you glistening? It's a wonderful time, to be a Scotsman, cos we're going to Euro 2008!"
    All I got from the biggest Scotland fan this weekend. (Joe Halliday, England). I take it he was drunk? Ed.


    "Camb-a-ridge uh-huh uh-huh, Un-i-ted, uh-huh uh-huh."
    Cambridge United fans - to the tune of 'That's The Way I Like It'. (David Ahluwalia, UK).

    "15 Points, Who gives a ****? We're super Leeds, And we're going up!"
    Leeds fans are over the 15-point penalty. (Lee, England).

    "4-all, we're gonna draw 4-all!"
    Exeter City fans after Richard Logan had put us 4-1 up at home, this coming after five straight home draws! (Jack Nex, England).

    "Youre ****, and you know you are."
    Swindon fans to Gillingham fans when they were winning 5-0.
    "We're ****, and we know we are!"
    Gillingham's reply! (Alex, Swindon).

    "Can you hear the Rangers sing?"
    Hibs fans at Ibrox after being kept behind - singing to a totally empty stadium. (Danny Bayne, Scotland).

    "Tell me ma, me ma, to put the champagne on ice, we're going to City twice!"
    Everton fans after progressing in the Uefa Cup - the final is at Manchester City's stadium. (Gaz Jones, UK).

    [​IMG] You're not special any more


    "Who needs Mourinho, we've got Dave Pacio."
    Droylsden fans getting behind their manager as they won their first game of the season. (James, England).

    "He's fat, He's round, he bounces all around. Sammy Lee, Sammy Lee."
    Chelsea fans to the Bolton manager. (David Lebby, UK).

    "Rooney! Rooney!"
    Everton fans to Metalist Kharkiv's vastly overweight physio. (Oliver Back, England).

    "We hate Tuesday!"
    Bristol City fans after Sheffield United fans had chanted "We hate Wednesday"! (Bob Charles, UK).

    "Are you Dida in disguise?"
    Sunderland fans to Almunia after he was "hit" on the head from a corner... (Andy, UK).

    "Easy, Easy!"
    Falkirk fans when they scored in the 80th minute to make it 4-1. They were the team getting beaten. (JM Stevenson, Scotland).

    "Just like your manager."
    Arsenal fans singing to Paul McShane when he got sent off during the Arsenal-Sunderland game.

    "We won it twice, we won it twi-i-ice, the Auto-Windshield, we won it twice."
    Wigan fans to Man Utd following their 4-0 defeat - sung to the tune of Sloop John B. (Phil Barker, England).

    "Swing low, sweet halibut!"
    Sung by Grimsby supporters as news of England's win over Australia in the Rugby World Cup filtered through. (Ben, England).
    "And it's Marton Fulop, Marton Fulop FC, they're by far the greatest team The world has ever seen."
    Leicester fans' chant to their Hungarian goalkeeper, Marton Fulop. (Sam, UK).


    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK

    "Substitution for West Germany..."
    Stadium announcer at Croke Park for the Ireland v Germany match, not realising reunification had taken place. (Tom Armstrong, Northern Ireland).

    "Could the owner of a Vauxhall Astra, registration number P914...., please return to their vehicle immediately, as it is rolling unacompanied."
    Heard at Oxford v Torquay. (Tom Baker, England).

    BANNER OF THE WEEK
    "Jonny Wilkinson will you marry me? Even when I'm old?"
    Spotted at the Stade de France. (Michael Scallon, England).
     
  6. yanks02

    yanks02 New Member

    Mar 19, 2002
    Houston
    Club:
    Manchester United FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    I still say this is the best chant ever.

    "Just like your manager."
    Arsenal fans singing to Paul McShane when he got sent off during the Arsenal-Sunderland game.
     
  7. dustcowpoke

    dustcowpoke Member

    Jan 7, 2006
    Houston, TX
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    "We Hate Tuesday" is pretty funny also.
     
  8. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    This week:


    "We hate you Sunday, we do
    We hate you Monday, we do
    We hate you Tuesday, we do
    But Wednesday, we love you!"
    Sheffield Wednesday fans against Leicester. (Molly, England).

    [​IMG] Eiffel Tower? Pah!


    "Blackpool Tower's better than that!"
    Sung by England rugby fans while watching a game on the big screen outside the Eiffel Tower. (Matt, England).

    "You're just a small town in Poland!"
    Southend fans at Walsall (Warsaw). (Joe Rutter, England).

    "Now he's playing more than ever, you can stand under my Darren Fletcher,
    Fletcher, Fletcher, ay, ay, ay,
    Under my Darren Fletcher, Fletcher, Fletcher, Fletcher, ay, ay, ay."
    Heard in a Glasgow nightclub on Saturday night to the tune of 'Umbrella'. (James Andersen, Scotland).


    "You're getting sacked in the morning!"
    Newcastle fans to Tottenham manager Martin Jol (Emma Wright, Newcastle).

    "Boom, boom, boom, let me hear you say Yeo, Yeooo!"
    Chester fans after Simon Yeo scored against Hereford. (Simon Dutton, UK).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK

    "Will Mr Darling go back home to Cambridge to see his wife go into labour. Thank you."
    Stafford Rangers v Cambridge United. (Walker Darke, UK).

    "A message for the owner of car registration -----. Your windows are wide open in the car park. It's a Rover, so it won't get stolen, but you had better return to it."
    Plymouth Argyle v Coventry. (Matthew Monaghan, England).

    BANNER OF THE WEEK
    "Wife or World Cup? I'm going to miss her."
    South African banner outside the Stade de France before the Rugby World Cup final. (Kristian Bourne, UK).
     
  9. schwabe13

    schwabe13 Member

    Jan 27, 2006
    in the best MLS town
    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK

    "Will Mr Darling go back home to Cambridge to see his wife go into labour. Thank you."
    Stafford Rangers v Cambridge United. (Walker Darke, UK).

    :D lol lol :D
     
  10. Orange1836

    Orange1836 don't believe the hype

    Dec 2, 2006
    Houston
    YOU would like that. you still own one of my favorite quotes:
    "You can change your wife, but you can't change your football team."
     
  11. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    And the Scots prefer Pepsi???


    "What's that coming over the hill - 10-point deduction, 10-point deduction."
    Colchester fans to Coventry regarding their lack of money. (Tom, Essex).

    "6-0 - even Sheva scored!"
    Chelsea fans after the thrashing of Man City. (Layla, UK).

    'We love you, Bolton, we do..."
    Leicester fans celebrate the departure of Gary Megson during the Barnsley match. (Jake, England).

    [​IMG] Puts hairs on your chest


    "We hate Coca-Cola, We hate Fanta too, Cos we're the Tartan Army, And we love Irn Bru!"
    Scotland fans watching Georgia game in a student bar in Aberdeen. (Ross G, Scotland).

    "You're the worst town in England!"
    Chelsea fans at the Riverside after Middlesbrough was voted the worst place to live. (Tom, Salisbury).

    "Are you Tottenham in disguise?"
    Arsenal fans after putting seven past Slavia Prague. (Matt, England).

    "There's only one Peter Taylor."
    Palace fans after they went 3-1 down to Stoke in Neil Warnock's first home game in charge. (Chris, UK).

    "Lino, Lino!"
    Colchester fans when it was announced over the tannoy that a pair of glasses had been handed in. (Kieran Savill and Rob Lewarne).

    "3-1 to the goldfish bowl!"
    Newcastle fans to ex-player Jermaine Jenas, who said living in the north-east was like living in a goldfish bowl. (Jordan Clough, England).

    "You dirty Northern ********!"
    Plymouth fans to Charlton. (David Rogers, England).

    "Are we England in disguise?"
    My Scottish wife chanting during the Georgia-Scotland game. (Richard Evans, UK).

    "If Mills can play for England, so can I!"
    Wolves fans to Charlton's Danny Mills. (Joe Williams, England).

    "You're not singing any more."
    Wolves fans to Charlton.
    "We weren't singing anyway!"
    Charlton's response. (David Payne, England).

    "You can stick your flat-pack wardrobes up your ****!"
    Northern Ireland fans v Sweden. (Gareth Todd, Northern Ireland).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK

    "Can the owner of a Ford Ka, registration XXXXXX, please return to your vehicle, as it is insecure."
    Announcer at the Peterborough-Hereford game. Perhaps it needed some reassurance? (Nick Edwards, UK).

    BANNER OF THE WEEK
    "Dhoni, please cut your hair, my salon isn't working!"
    Seen on a banner in the 20-20 game between India and Australia in Mumbai. (Dhruv P, UK).
     
  12. dustcowpoke

    dustcowpoke Member

    Jan 7, 2006
    Houston, TX
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    This is the best one the tune is from The Automatics "Monster".

    The Brits seem to have a talent in creating new chants from popular new songs. Granted, I don't know how many actually took part in this chant. Could be the whole stand (IE Who are ya and Stand up if you love) or it could have been two drunken supporters. :D
     
  13. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Western Conference Final Edition, check out the text on the banner:

    Can we play you every week?"
    Man City fans while 6-0 down to Chelsea. (David, UK).

    "Swing Low, Sweet Chariot..."
    Ipswich Town fans after Dan Harding skied his free-kick into the top tier of the South Stand against Wolves.


    "There's Only One Jonny Wilkinson!"
    Wolves join in the fun. (Harrison Page, England).

    [​IMG] Robin Hood - dead famous


    "If Robin Hood was real, he'd be dead!"
    Oldham supporters at Forest. (Luke, England).

    "Let's all wave at Warnock!"
    Sung by Watford at Crystal Palace, followed by 1,000 fans waving across the pitch to Neil Warnock. (Phil, England).

    "There's only one Gary Mills."
    Tamworth fans after boss Gary Mills got rid of midfielder....Gary Mills.

    "Where's your Hamilton - where's your Hamilton?"
    Salisbury fans at Stevenage in FA Cup qualifying match, after Stevenage-born Lewis Hamilton announced he was leaving the UK for Switzerland. (Ed, Cambridge).

    "Li-ver-pool, hoof the ball."
    Arsenal fans at Anfield, after Liverpool started playing long-ball tactics. (Jonny, Ireland).

    "You're not fit to referee!"
    During the Sheffield Wednesday-Blackpool game, when the referee went off injured. (Dave D, UK).

    "Ade - Bom By Yay!"
    Arsenal fans adapt the famous Muhammad Ali chant for striker Emmanuel Adebayor. (Jackson, England).

    "We've got De Canio, **** off Mourinho!"
    QPR fans salute their new manager against Hull. (Alex Ferguson, UK).

    [​IMG] Coming on to the field, Weston-super-Mare

    "Car-park near Stansted, you're just a car-park near Stansted."
    Weston-super-Mare fans to their Bishop's Stortford counterparts.
    "Bus-stop near Bristol, you're just a bus-stop near Bristol."
    Stortford fans make a swift retort! (Gareth Stephens, England).


    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK
    "Coming on for Fulham, Shefki Cuckoo."
    Fulham announcer gets in a flap as Shefki Kuqi comes on as a sub against Reading.


    "Mr Coombes in L1, your wife has just gone into labour."
    At Leicester v Barnsley game. (Josh Sewell, England).

    FLAG OF THE WEEK
    "United, Kids, Wife...in that order."
    Seen on a banner during the Man Utd-Arsenal game. (Anon).
     
  14. dustcowpoke

    dustcowpoke Member

    Jan 7, 2006
    Houston, TX
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Thanks man brilliant chants once again mate.
     
  15. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    MLS Cup 07 Planning Edition:


    "You dirty northern b******s!" Torquay fans to Yeovil after a Torquay player was hacked down! (Neil Blinston, USA).

    "We want nine!"
    Manchester United fans after their second goal against Kiev, desperate not to be outdone by Liverpool! (Dale, England).

    [​IMG] No-one wants to see that


    "Get your ass out for the lads!"
    Bristol City fans after Liam Fontaine scored against Wolves. Johnson said at the start of the season - after Fontaine missed a sitter - he would bare his bum in a shop window if he ever scored. (Gary Turner, Bristol).

    "Are you Besiktas in disguise?"
    Sheffield Wednesday fans to Southampton when the Saints went 5-0 down. (Will Sarson, England).

    "Meat pie, sausage roll, come on fatty - score a goal!"
    Sung by Bishop's Stortford fans to Basingstoke's overweight left-back. (Ben Markham, England).

    "Are you Wigan in disguise?"
    Bolton fans to Bayern Munich during the 2-2 draw. (Foster, England).

    "We've got more snow than you!"
    Aberdeen fans to Lokomotiv Moscow on a snowy, wintry night at Pittodrie. (Scott Donaldson, Scotland).

    "You're just a small town in Poland!"
    Brighton fans to Walsall's travelling support. (James Blake, Brighton).

    "Top of the league, your havin' a laugh!"
    West Brom fans during the 3-0 victory over Watford at Vicarage Road.
    "Top of the league, we're havin' a laugh!"
    Watford fans reply. (Jonathan Parrott, England).

    [​IMG] Uh-oh, here comes Diouf

    "He's gonna spit in a minute."
    West Ham fans to Bolton's El Hadji Diouf.
    (Mike Amis, Chelmsford, Essex).


    "Are you Frodo in disguise?"
    Histon fans' chant at the rather short referee in the match against Bamber Bridge. (Don Wilderspin, England).

    "You can stick your Yorkshire puddings up your a***!"
    Carlisle fans to the Leeds fans after the 3-1 win! (Jack Dobinson, England).

    "Lets go Marek Mintal!"
    From a group of us who went to watch Nuremberg v Frankfurt - Nuremberg won 5-1 and their star player was Marek Mintal - so we started the chant. Sadly the Germans didn't catch on. (Jimmy, UK).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK


    "Tottenham's box office have announced that all tickets are sold out for next season's league game against Leeds."
    Half-time announcer at Stamford Bridge.(Emily, UK).

    "A message to the Family Stand - can you please start a Mexican wave?"
    From the 150th anniversary game at Sheffield United. (Danny Waller, England).
     
  16. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Of course nothing tops the "Buffalo Bills" Chant that the SOB's hurled at the Revs Fans on Sunday. :D


    "Who picked your team this week?" and "Stand up if you own Ebbsfleet."
    Oxford United fans to the travelling Ebbsfleet fans on Saturday. (Andy Roberts, Oxford).

    Oh Kasper, whoah, whoh, oh,
    Oh Kasper, whoah, whoh, oh,
    He stands between our posts,
    He's named after a ghost.
    Cardiff fans to keeper Kasper Schmeichel. (Rhys, Wales).

    "It's just like being in church!"
    Blackburn fans at an incredibly quiet Old Trafford. (Niall, Preston).

    [​IMG] Just call him 'Two Songs'


    "I saw my mate, the other day,
    He said to me he's seen the white Pele,
    He said to me, whats his name?
    I said to him, his name is Buzsaky, Buzsaky, Buzsaky."
    QPR fans to Akos Buzsaky at Palace. (Saffa Michail, Isle of Wight).

    "Ohh! We're half way there! Ohh-ohh! Aliadiere!"
    Boro fans to their striker. (Matt, England).

    "La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la Aliadiere - Jeremie Aliadiere!"
    And there's more...to the tune of 'Baby Give it Up'. (Anthony, England).

    "Have yeh no paid yer 'leccy bill?"
    Aberdeen supporters after the floodlights cut out at Tynecastle during Hearts' 4-1 win. (Laura, Scotland).

    "Davis, Davis give us a save!"
    Ironic chants from Southampton fans saints to keeper Kelvin Davis while 5-0 down at Hillsborough. (Peter B, England).

    "Bring on the Chelsea!"
    Derby fans when 5-0 down to West Ham, with Chelsea next up at Pride Park. (David, UK).

    "We'll never play you again."
    Arsenal fans to their Reading counterparts when winning at Madejski stadium.
    "You *******said that last year!"
    Reading fans reply. (John Bycroft, UK)

    "It's just like watching Seville!"
    Spurs fans to new manager Juande Ramos. (Lewis Buckler, England).

    [​IMG] The locals took the Cup defeat well


    "Ooh arrr, it's a massacarrrrrrr!"
    Torquay fans while 4-1 up against Yeovil in the FA Cup. (David Hart, England).

    "We've got more stands than you've got points!"
    Cambridge United fans reminding long-suffering Northwich supporters of their team's record of no wins in 19 games so far this season. (Neil the milkman, Norfolk).


    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK


    "There is a no-smoking policy in all parts of the Layer Road ground. Anyone who is caught smoking will be taken away, strapped to an electric chair and electrocuted until they are dead. Thank you."
    Colchester announcer at half-time in the Leicester game, according to The Sun.

    "The referee for tonight's match is Mr A E Rayner."
    At Vale Park as Amy Rayner jogged out on the pitch to referee Port Vale Reserves against Shrewsbury Town Reserves. No truth in the rumour Mike Newell was guest announcer! (Mark Whitby, England).
    "This is a message for Alex xxxxxxxx, just to remind you that your mother is waiting outside the front for you."
    Heard over the tannoy at Cambridge v Northwich Victoria. (FarJhole, England).
     
  17. Macsen

    Macsen Moderator
    Staff Member

    Nov 5, 2007
    Orlando
    Club:
    Orlando City SC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    This is the English chant of the year. :p
     
  18. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    And after things get back to "normal" on the Isles:


    "Kalala la la la la la - JP, Kalala la la la la la - JP, Kalala la la la la..." (To the tune of Amarillo).
    Oldham fans to midfielder Jean-Paul Kalala. (Luke_oafc, England)

    "Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na - Darryl, Darryl Knights, Darryl Knights, Darryl, Darryl Knights." (To the tune of Baby Give It Up).
    Cambridge United fans to on-loan striker Darryl Knights. (Lewis W the Junior U, England).

    [​IMG] I'd rather be watching Reading


    "You should have gone Christmas shopping!"
    Man City fans to Reading after going one-nil up. (Helen, Reading).

    "You're just a bus stop in West Ham."
    Sung by us Yeovil fans during our 2-1 defeat at Millwall. (Dan Gillard, England). Brave or just plain daft? Ed.

    "Are you England in disguise?"
    Jubilant Staines Town fans to Stockport counterparts after scoring an early goal on Thursday. (Matt, Chertsey).

    "Three caretakers' blue and white army!"
    Barrow fans pay tribute to their three-man player/caretaker management team in the FA Cup first round replay at Bournemouth. (Andy Steel, England).

    "Banksy, Banksy, swing on the bar!"
    Hearts fans to goalkeeper Steve Banks while winning 4-1 against Aberdeen. Banks then runs up and swings on the bar! (Thomas Arnot, Scotland).

    "He's big, he's Scouse, he looks like Mickey Mouse - it's Franny Jeffers, Franny Jeffers!"
    Sheffield Wednesday fans against Southampton. (Molly Fenwick, Doncaster).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK

    "Has anyone got any cheese?"
    The Penrith announcer's comment which was unwittingly broadcast over the public address system during the game with Marske United. (Paul, Marske).
     
  19. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    The Harry Redknapp "Who, me??" Edition.


    "They searched the house and took a computer away that I bought my wife two years ago - I think she learnt to turn it on four weeks ago."
    Harry Redknapp comes over all PC after laying into police who raided his home during a 'football corruption' investigation.

    "I held a meeting with my players. I told them about the agent and that allegedly he had paid some of his fee to the player. All of them wanted his phone number because they had never heard of an agent who wanted to give a player any money!"
    Redknapp's plans to stick to a prepared statement don't last long.

    "I have received texts from many players who I have worked with - and top managers - and I have really appreciated them. Of course, I couldn't get e-mails because now I haven't got a computer."
    Harry gives Peter Kay a run for his money as he warms to his theme.

    And now the chants:

    CHANTS OF THE WEEK


    [​IMG] And coming on for Everton....

    "I am the Music Man.
    I come from far away.
    And I can play (what can you play?)
    I Play The Pienaar!
    Pi Pi Pienaaaaaar!"
    Everton's new song for Steven Pienaar.
    (Danny Bostock, Wrexham).


    Newcastle fans: "Shearer! Shearer!"
    Blackburn fans: "Where did Shearer win the league?"
    Banter at Blackburn-Newcastle. (Andy, England).

    "Sven, Sven wherever you may be/You are the pride of Man City/You can s*** my wife on our settee/If we win a cup at Wem-ber-lee."
    Man City fans to Sven. (Jim Hall, Rainow).

    "You're staying home, you're staying home, England staying home!"
    Cardiff to travelling Ipswich fans, to the tune of Three Lions. (Jack, Wales).

    "You're just a town with one surname."
    Cambridge Utd fans to Burton. (James, England).

    "Hey, Swansea....leave our sheep alone!"
    Tranmere fans to Swansea - to the tune of Pink Floyd's Another Brick In The Wall. (Will, UK).

    "You're just a theme park in Preston."
    Southampton fans to Blackpool counterparts during Southampton's 1-0 win. (Will T, England).

    "You're not going home!"
    Preston fans to Charlton after a stadium announcement saying the M6 southbound had been closed down. (Matt, England).

    "You are our feeder club."
    Tottenham fans to West Ham fans.
    "That's why you're going down."
    West Ham fans' response. (Gary Arnold, England).

    "He's got his IQ on his shirt."
    Sung to James Scowcroft by Colchester fans - he wears the number eight. (Tom, Essex).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK

    "There is a no-smoking policy at Layer Road. Anyone caught smoking will be taken to a darkened room, where they will be imprisoned for 27 hours and forced to listen to Will Young records for all of that time. Thank you."
    Colchester's announcer tops his previous effort at half-time against Crystal Palace. (Greg, England).
     
  20. Macsen

    Macsen Moderator
    Staff Member

    Nov 5, 2007
    Orlando
    Club:
    Orlando City SC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Nice crackback by West Ham.
     
  21. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    The Who the F*** is Ricky Hatton Edition.


    "You're supposed to be at home!"
    Ricky Hatton fans to their American counterparts before the big fight in Las Vegas.

    "Walking in a Hatton wonderland."
    The refrain heard before, during and after the fight.

    "Theres only one Floyd Mayweather."
    Spurs fans to Man City supporters following Ricky Hatton's defeat to the 'Pretty boy'. (Josh Taylor, UK).

    [​IMG] McCann has been feeling a little strange lately


    "Gavin McCann, Gavin McCann, Gavin McCann, Gavin McCann, Gavin McCann."
    Bolton fans (to the tune of the Addams Family) to a heavily-bandaged Gavin McCann. (Paul Breckell, UK).

    "You should have gone to the rugby."
    West Brom fans away at Leicester. (Smithy, England).

    "We'll never play you again!"
    Leeds fans to Huddersfield counterparts, despite the fact they have another league game in March! (Jean-Marc, England).

    "You might as well ski home."
    Chelsea fans to Rosenberg fans after scoring three first-half goals in Norway. (Pat, UK).

    "Linesman from Matalan."
    Sheffield United fans to useless linesman at Charlton. (Alan Hopkins, England).

    "And now you're gonna believe us....we've scored away from home!"
    Derby fans after they score their first away goal at Old Trafford, but let four in. (Elliott, Derby). England

    "We wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!"
    Sung by Sheffield Wednesday supporters and then sung back by Coventry fans for a whole 10 minutes. (Molly Fenwick, Doncaster).

    "Onome Sodje, picks up the ball in the half where possesion has been. Has anyone seen...Onome Sodje."
    York City fans to the tune of Eleanor Rigby after the Nigerian forward equalised against Crawley Town. (Ben Abel, England).

    [​IMG] Jamie who?


    There's only one Jamie Oliver!"
    Cardiff fans to Delia Smith's Norwich. (Andreas, England).

    "There's only one Gay in Chelmsford!"
    Chelmsford City fans to their keeper Danny Gay during the 1-0 win at AFC Wimbledon. (Graeme Seymour, England).

    "We're gonna deep fry yer tapas!"
    Aberdeen fans in Madrid. (Gordi, Scotland).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK

    "The object of the crossbar challenge is to hit the crossbar while avoiding the forking groundsman." (Who was getting in the way of the half-time competition replacing divots).
    The Colchester announcer, yet again. (Richard, UK).


    "There is a small child missing - could he please meet his parents in the smoking area."
    At Cambridge United. Either the parents encourage smoking or the young child's secret is out! (Scott, England).

    SIGNS OF THE WEEK


    'Please be aware of flying footballs."
    Sign at Reading's stadium. (Heather, Manchester).

    "My wife thinks I'm Christmas shopping!"
    A man at the darts with a beer in one hand and this sign in the other. (Tom, UK).
     
  22. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    The "I can't believe it's not Butter" Fabio Edition.

    [​IMG]


    "I am very proud and honour-red to be the England manager."
    Fabio Capello introduces himself to the press, before wisely reverting to Italian.

    "It's like going from Captain Mainwaring to Field Marshall Montgomery in one fell swoop."
    England fans' spokesman Mark Perryman realises Capello is no stupid boy.

    "Be worried, be very worried. This man will not suffer fools."
    Former AC Milan and England striker Mark Hateley warns you won't like Fabio when he's angry.

    "His only complaint was the weather. It was too cold for him!"
    Capello's son, Pierfilippo, on the old man's visit to London. You think this is cold, old son?
    "Why do you go for a foreign guy? It is like you go to war and say 'Now we choose a general from Portugal or a general from Italy'. Would that cross your mind? Never."
    Arsene Wenger cannot fathom why the FA didn't appoint an Englishman.

    Chants:


    "Sunday, Monday, Habib Beye
    Tuesday, Wednesday, Habib Beye
    Thursday, Friday, Habib Beye
    Saturday, Habib Beye, rocking all week with you!"
    Newcastle fans at Fulham. (Graeme, England).

    "There's two dollars to the pound!"
    To the tune of "He's got the whole world in his hands" - sung by English boxing fans at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas after the Hatton-Mayweather fight. (Andy Bowling, England).

    "Jingle bells, jingle bells, Diouf's gonna score, oh what fun it is to see Anelka get two more!"
    Bolton fans' festive song. (Andrew Gallacher, England).

    "Can we play you every week?"
    Boro fans after beating Arsenal. (Philip Gardner, Teesside).

    "No diving in the shallow end!"
    Coventry fans on the state of the pitch at the Sheffield Wednesday match. (LJ, UK).

    "Just like your manager!"
    Chelsea fans when Sunderland's Liam Miller was sent off. Not sure if Roy Keane appeciated it! (Barry Crowley, England).

    STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK

    "There is no smoking at Layer Road - not even round the back of the stands. Anyone caught smoking will be taken to the top of one of the floodlights and dangled there until the next home match."
    Colchester's announcer takes a softer line on smokers against Norwich than previously. (Greg, England). Previous threats ranged from electrocution to being forced to listen to Will Young, Ed.


    BANNERS OF THE WEEK

    "See You At Euro 2008."
    Steaua Bucharest fans sneaking in a cheeky banner at the Emirates. Although the irony is that Arsenal of course don't have many English players and are full of internationals! (William Bone, UK).
     
  23. Offebacher

    Offebacher Member

    May 14, 2006
    Houston
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Not a Chant of the Week page, but check this out:

    There's not much left to be said about the new England manager. We know he's a tough cookie with a serious art collection and a phobia of hairy shins...but did anyone realise his name translates literally as 'Bean Hair'?

    Capello, as anyone with a basic grasp of languages will know (I had to ask someone) means hair, while Fabio, according to the '20,000 Names' wesbsite, is an "Italian, Portuguese and Spanish name derived from the Roman Fabius, meaning bean." www.20000-names.com/male_ita...

    As soon as the tabloids get hold of this they'll have a field day - 'Mr Bean', 'The Hair Bear Bunch' and, if he brings home the World Cup in 2010....'Bean Hair, Won That'?

    The media have been desperate to get their hands on anyone and anything Capello-related, with The Sun having a chat with his 85-year-old mother, Evelina.

    Mrs C confessed: "I wished he had stayed in Italy" - words that will be particularly poignant when the same paper inevitably superimposes her beautiful boy on to some root vegetable or other.

    Mind you, unlike the perma-grinned Steve McClaren, who was laughing all the way to the bank, Capello is no pushover and if past experiences are anything to go on, he will have no problem in saying what he thinks.

    This, after all, is the man who sold Ronaldo (the Brazilian one) for being too fat and told Paolo Di Canio: "Your face looks like a penis." Lord only knows what he'll make of Phil Neville.




    The bookies have David Beckham as favourite to captain England in Capello's first game against the Swiss (the only glimpse England fans will have of Switzerland next year) and Becks has been doing everything he can to catch the new man's eye by posing in a pair of skimpy undies which appear to contain not just the obligatory meat and two veg but a five-course banquet to boot.

    Meanwhile McClaren has been rewarded for his sterling efforts as England coach by winning a trophy - the Plain English Campaign's annual Foot in Mouth award.

    The prize is given for speaking a load of gibberish and came after his comment that "Wayne Rooney is inexperienced, but he's experienced in terms of what he's been through."

    Other gems came from Sepp Blatter who revealed he had a conversation with the British Prime Minister, 'Gordon Banks', while Sunderland boss Roy Keane said he was happy for goalkeeper Craig Gordon to have a mid-season holiday - "as long as he doesn't go out in a canoe".


    OTHER STUFF
    Ronaldo vs freestyle footballer Billy Wingrove in a skills showdown: www.youtube.com/watch?v=az7t...
    Peruvian player Efrain Viafara gets to the bottom of things: www.youtube.com/watch?v=82oR...
    Blacburn's male cheerleader: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hsrt...
     
  24. Dynamogal

    Dynamogal Member

    Oct 2, 2006
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    1. awesome
    2. funny
    3. funnier :D
     
  25. Macsen

    Macsen Moderator
    Staff Member

    Nov 5, 2007
    Orlando
    Club:
    Orlando City SC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    This is awesome, but I still prefer the Aliadiere "Livin' on a Prayer" chant a few weeks ago for Chant of the Year. :p
     

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