Absolutely agree based on my son's experience, and not just in club soccer. If your high school team has cuts and that's the first tryout with consequences you've been through, being cut or placed on the JV when you expected more can be pretty brutal. He's come home both years so far feeling terrible for kids who left tryouts in tears over cuts or JV placements. He's in the unfortunate spot now of either continuing to make the roster of his current club team -- and there's no guarantee, given that he isn't a regular starter -- dropping way down in the level of play to find another club if he doesn't (we don't live in a major metro area), or quitting club soccer (hard to picture, but who knows?). He hasn't been happy about the transition from FT starter to bench/role player over the past 7-8 months, but I overheard him talking with a teammate in a similar spot about the upside of that versus playing more on a lesser team -- something along the lines of how much better they're getting practicing regularly with higher-level players. Remarkably mature, to a surprising degree. I'm hoping there's a payoff.
Wonderful posts in this thread! Much depends upon the mentalities of the players, too. You've got to roll with their personalities, and try to help them hone what gives them strength. Easier said than done sometimes. My U14 daughter is through-the-roof competitive with a surly, yet disciplined---thanks to her involvement with soccer---edge to her. On the field, friendships are very much contingent, to the point where she will end/pause longstanding relationships for the sake of the game. She is the kind of kid who thrives on having to scratch and claw for what she wants (but is willing to wait patiently/stoically, as circumstances dictate), and also does not want to be told that she simply cannot do something. I imagine that she will hit a very steep wall with the sport when college looms, but she's resourceful and stubborn, so I'm certainly not betting against her. With a child of this sort, the crazy, yet realistic parents (ex-coaches, ex-college players, students of the game, etc.) are the best allies you're going to find, which is to say that the casual stuff is not in the cards, regardless of how much you might wish it were. Where my youngest (son---U9) is concerned, I can already tell that---thankfully---the path won't be nearly as jagged/intense. He's talented, but is not driven or obsessed quite like his older sister. He likes having his buddies around him, and friendships are what matters to him.
State Cup was an epic disaster for many clubs. Some did way better then they should have and others did way worse. Some teams even had to forfiet based on a lack of players. I would not use State Cup (this year) - or even this past season to measure anything IMO. But you're other points are spot on brother!
We were fortunate with our son and his situation, but it took a while to get to the spot he's in. When he was looking to switch teams (the year they went to the birth years instead of school year cutoff), we knew the manager of one of the other clubs in town. He told us to have our son come to a couple weeks of practice near the end of the fall, so he didn't go through a formal "tryout", but the coach evaluated him and said he would be a good fit for their team and club. It was still the 'B' team, but he was happy and even got added to their state cup roster that spring (which they won). For a year or two after that, however, the team had a hard time finding their identity. Our club essentially had three teams in his age group, but neither the 'B' team or the 'C' team was really a cohesive unit. My son ended up playing a lot of time for both teams, but he never knew exactly who was on the roster on any given day. Finally, this spring, it's all come together. They have the same 18 man roster that has been together all spring and it's shown. They're still a B team, but considering the A team is one of the best U16 teams in the country, they're all pretty much good with it. And while my son knows there's one or two kids on the A team he is probably better than, he knows he'd be the 17th or 18th man on that roster and is much happier being a key piece to the team he's on. And they're on to the US Club State Cup semis this weekend, so they've been successful as well. So, I guess what I'm saying is that sometimes it takes some patience for things to come together. Then again, I like to joke with my son that there's not a lot of other clubs he could go to now (he tends to be a polarizing player - the type of kid you love having on your side, but hate to play against).
Well you are realistic as well - doesn't sound like you are pushing for the A team and know where your son is. That's golden IMO! You get a lot less stress and headaches that way!
Absolutely - we're glad he's getting quality coaching, challenging games and plenty of minutes. And we're realistic that he won't likely be playing beyond HS. He's probably Div III level at this point, and he's looking to go to a D1 school (for their engineering programs), so he's considering trying out for a club team when he gets to college.
This will be the first year DS has tried out for multiple clubs, and it's for his U19 year. In all honesty, we should have done it last year, but just didn't see the writing on the wall.
As expected, because of the big exodus to pre-ENCL, my son was offered a slot after the first night of tryouts for his current team. Our club officially gives 24hrs to accept, which seems ridiculous. Regardless after the second night for the current team we went to the other club's tryouts which were super conveniently at the park next door. Overall a good experience, they had more kids, ran a better first night, and have better fields. My son struggled a bit in a midfielder role with kids he didn't know and trying to move the ball. We didn't wait on an offer from the second club and committed to the first club that evening. I emailed the second club to remove him from consideration. Because we had the offer we wanted in hand, the whole thing was low stress and a good experience. We aren't of an age or elite status where politics really come into play either. This sets the stage for a move next year if desired. My son will need to decide over the year if he's serious about wanting to play up a level and commit to it or to continue along in a mid-tier team in a mid-tier club. It's in his hands!
Truthfully, many clubs around us end up offering spots to pretty much everyone who tries out. As long as the check clears...
Our U14 team just picked up four players from tryouts. They went all offense. Two of the players I've seen and will help. One I know won't. The other I don't know about. We're demoting a good, but small midfielder to the B team and a crap striker. Roster size looks to be going up by two so far. We have a defender which I would have dropped too, but don't think that is going to happen.
This surprised me a little... As I mentioned, DS is going to try out for four different clubs this time, including his current club. Of course, one of the other club tryouts conflicts with his current club. We had told DS to simply say to his current club he "had another commitment", without saying it was a tryout. Since he's supposed to have a new coach, we didn't want that coach to hold it against him that he's looking at options. Last night after training, his current coach pulled him aside said the club isn't doing a U18 team next year (he'll be U19), and it will be a combined U18/U19. He knows DS is going to try out for other clubs, and he'd hate to lose him, but understands DS has to do what's right for him. The coach also said he'd call DS after tryouts and try to 'sell' him on returning. Apparently his current coach (who was supposed to coach U18) is going to help with the U19 since there won't be a U18 team. Yes, I know the "right" thing would have been just be straight up with the coach/club. But we also didn't want to burn bridges if the other clubs didn't work out.
It seems that U18/19 teams are the norm these days, especially since the switch to birth years. You lose about half the interested players for U19, with only those planning on playing in college participating after their senior year HS season. Even our state cup tourneys combine the oldest age group - there is no U18 tourney, just U19 and U17.
I was talking to a coworker who has two girls in the same club (same age) as DS. So they're U18. U18G has TWO teams registered for the State Open. Both teams are automatically in the finals. U19G has FIVE teams registered (one team name has '03' in it). Conversely the boys have seven teams at U18 and nine teams at U19. On our team, we have six 2021 graduates still playing (started with 9), and eight 2022 graduates (started with 8).
So who has moved on to a new club and why? Who has stayed and why? For my 05 daughter - we stayed on. Team is good - known the coach for a few years and love the DOC. We have our own fields and indoor facility so I am not worried about resources. Additionally - 05/04/03 are tough years if a player wants to move. Many players on the edge (lower end of skill) have stepped away from the sport - encouraged to to other things based on their high school experiences or just tired of the commitment - at least that's what I have noticed. The result means there are less top teams and less teams across the board really. So you cannot play around too late into the season otherwise your player will end up with no chair when the music stops.
We need to find a way to keep more kids playing. I recognize the need to develop top players better as well, but it seems that we sacrifice the former for the latter--without doing the latter particularly well. That said--happy for your daughter!
Moved my Son(2010),plays 09. I saw the writing on the wall of the 08/07 groups borrowing players constantly, needed guest players for State Cups. No subs on teams. When you never have to worry about playing time, the commitment level shows.
That so bothers me--my son spent a couple of years fighting for every minute of playing time, and we still did everything we were supposed to do as far as attendance. Don't over-commit your kids; it's not good for anybody.
Truth be told, some parents care very little about team commitments or the like. It's a mere trifle to them, or so it seems. The attitude's infuriating, especially when you have a kid who works hard and makes the effort to attend as many training sessions and matches as possible. When my daughter initially began her travel-ball career, she was placed on the third team at our local club. I can't tell you how many of those Fall '18 matches ended up being 7v9 or 8v9 affairs with no bench, but it was a significant number. The situation certainly tested the committed players, but it wasn't always fun.
I have to admit - HS play has been very good. My kids HS team is superior to her club team but that's based on maturity alone - with 9 seniors and most of them playing on the same club team for years which is ranked very high. That said, I am looking very much forward to the start of club - just not the drive!
My '07 daughter will be on her third club in as many seasons when the August gets here. The first move was precipitated by a number of issues associated with the local club (too many to name), while the second was brought on by just a feeling of "not quite right...almost" during the just-concluded season. She played ECRL (ECNL regional league) this past year, and will continue---with opportunities to play at the NL level---with that league/level at the new club. Your comments about the 16-18 year-old players are spot on from what I've observed. I've been willing to let my daughter decide where she wants to take her game because I know full well that moving around won't be quite as easy during the next 3-4 years. Hopefully this new club is what she thinks it is; I trust her judgment.
debating the move for my daughter. She's playing up one year (2008 (7th grade) playing 2007). The club is transitioning to letting girls play high school, so she's kind of left behind. There doesn't seem to be a plan for the 2007 girls electing to not play high school. The direction of the club seems to be in doubt in different ways (facilities are starting to fall behind, coaches leaving, etc). Used to be Academy, now in the GAL. She could play ECNL at another club for age appropriate is my guess based on what I've seen. But all her friends play at her current club. But even she's debating it based on the competition and some girls leaving. My guess is she'll stay again this year and see how it goes with the fall league and practices. The club really needs to have a plan in place for the time when all the rest of the girls are playing high school. They said they had one, but now it doesn't seem like it.
I think you should let her play soccer. It's a completely different experience and can make the high school transition way better - especially if she has a shot at Varsity as a Freshman.
DS has been in two clubs so far in his 10 year career. He's trying out for three new ones (he's already been told he's wanted on his current club) for his final year. He's an 03 who will play U19. The quality of his team on his current club has dropped drastically compared to when he started. All the tryouts are next week. I'm hoping he gets selected to the team he wants. One thing he has going for him is there will be at least some 03s who won't return because they'll be in college next year. DD is staying with her current club (that's she's played with for the last 8 years). She's an 06.