Would there be any reason at all former Monkeyboy (This is what my wife calls the coach known as Bruce Arena) would be arriving into Columbus today? We don't play the Redbuds again this year (save any potential postseason). My wife is about 99% sure it was Monkeyboy at Cup O' Joe in the airport today. He's about the only soccer coach she could ever recognize. In addition to his striking visage, there was the bag that he was carrying a bag that had a Snickers and MLS logos on it. I'm not sure what's up with the Snickers logo deal. Maybe we finally reached a deal for that pesky little draft pick that Ives keeps bitching about!!
Take my face out of the official Crew fan directory if it has anything remotely close to bringing Arena in as boss. Maybe he's our DP signing!
DannyS for Angel, works for me. The idea of The Bruce coming to C'bus (or the circus) as he once referred to it is beyond the human thought process. It's gotta be a trade for Danny.
If only we'd known, we could have prepared something. Buckshot, for example. Or buckets of warm horse shit. The day he becomes part of the Crew organization is the day I become a baseball fan.
This is very very interesting indeed. I'd be very interested to see if this is some sort of negotiation. Actually, it might be a sign and trade sort of a deal, as in, Danny will sign with MLS for the contract he wants, but the Crew don't want to keep him on those terms, however NY will. So we get his name on the paper and promptly send him to NYC for .... I dunno what we'd get. Other possible moves?
But with the way this organization works it will probably be.............. JOHN WOLYNIEC! (and a set of brand new steakknives for every fan)
I hardly think that Arena would fly into Columbus to negotiate a trade. Nothing that can't be done over the phone. On the other hand, I've been tossing around the fact that if Klinnsy is really going to coach LA (and that drama looks like it may drag on as long as the "Klinnsy to US" deal, which itself lasted as long as World War II, and all the while poor Frank Yallop is out there twisting in the wind) then we do all recall that previously Sigi was all hot to work as Juergen's Assistant with te US. Now clearly, an MLS assistancy is not on a par with a national team assistancy. No question it's a step down. But AEG can and likely would be willing to match his current salary, thus bringing in a guy who knows LA, is known in LA and knows MLS, knows college soccer, etc., none of which Klinsmann has the first damn clue about. So you bring in The Fat Man and maybe call him a Technical Director or even (less likely) can that douchebag Lalas and make him GM. Klinnsy gets the guy he's wanted all along, Sigi gets to go back where he wants to be and Columbus gets him out of a situation which, let's be honest, isn't exactly working out. Which may also be why the whole LA?Yallop?Klinnsman deal hasn't been announced although all the indications were that they'd pull the trigger this week. Just like with the USSF, Juergen has a long list of guys he wants to bring in or he won't take the job - and everyone admits that Sigi was one of them previously - and it's taking a while to get the pieces in place. Also, I believe they're arranging a soft landing for Yallop who, as I've said, is obviously going to San Jose. So they may want to get that lined up in advance as well, so he doesn't look like damaged goods and makes a triumphal return to the Bay Area like Christ come to cleanse the Temple. NONE OF WHICH explains Arena, however. I don't believe for one minute that Bruce would even consider coming to Columbus. Indeed, he's mostly been talking about retiring, and he certainly isn't in the market for a rebuilding project out here. He's an east coast/new york (Brooklyn, isn't it?) guy and, in any case, Red Bull has given him a big salary and two DP's and a new stadium and all of that. Just makes no sense for him to come here. I don't believe it for a minute.
Maybe Bruce has body doubles that are sent to wander the land to sow rumor and confusion. Could just be mistaken identity: people keep on mistaking me for Jerry Garcia, except for the Chinese: they think I look like Karl Marx.
I'll take the bait... For the most part, yes, except if he wants to run a player through some physical test before signing some papers, if Sigi won't let that player travel out to NYC in case the deal falls through and they're needs for the weekend's game. Also, if there are delicate negotiations of some kind, it's easier to vouche nobody is listening in that shouldn't be in you're there in person than if you're on a phone. Also, if it's so easy to do all on the phone, then why do we send McCullers to Argentina to sign Guille? Why did DC send their brass to try and convince Veron if they could have failed at it over the phone? Except that Klinsmann has been living in LA for how many years now? Something like 5+ maybe? He's spent loads of time with the Gals at their training facilities, the sports fitness and medical guys (who's theories he brought to the "new" German NT before the WC06). I'll give you that Sigi adds to the networking ciricle, for sure, but Klinsmann in LA isn't some lost puppy from Iowa showing up on the last Greyhound bus. Exactly... so if we assume the Arena sighting is accurate, brings us back to a line of thought that it isn't a face to face interview to take over for Sigi. Could it be something as simple as scouting? What about the college scene this weekend in Columbus? Is OSU playing or are there other teams coming through town or anything that might draw him out to just scout a game?
If Bruce is running some physical test on a player, I am sure it involves a jar of vasoline. There are 3 possibilities 1. Discreet location to meet boyfirned Ben Olsen 2. To Complete trade for Teddy Nizoliac 3. There are more people that look like a monkey than Bruce Arena. in fact here is one Actor Taylor Negron, Cousin of Chuck Negron, former main lead singer of 60s/70s rock/pop group Three Dog Night.
Also, if he was seen at the Cup of Joe, then he was on the OTHER side of security---other side from departing flight gates. No traveler in today's post 9/11 era risks the time and effort involved with leaving the secured departure area for the anarchy of the food court/shopping area, so he likely ARRIVED at Port Columbus from within the city and had some time to kill. Also, I don't think Port Columbus is a hub for any particular airlines anymore and I don't think too many flights utilize PC as "layover" type airport. If it is just a stopover, the passenger generally don't off-board and on board again. And, again, they definitely don't leave the departure area for the ticket counter area. Maybe our new slogan: "Columbus: You're either intentionally leaving or intentionally arriving."
One thing going against the mistaken identity theory is this snickers-MLS logod (logoed? logo-ed?...) bag. I don't think OSU soccer has started yet so probably not scouting. Any local kids still playing in HS that would be good enough to be drafted? My guess is no. Maybe he's arriving to go to heineygate (sp?) for the co-eds. Of course, OSU isn't in session yet and if he was at cup-o-joe he was probably leaving, not arriving. Maybe he's got himself some 19 year old gf/fiance from c-bus a la Mr. Cream. Is BA just the coach or is he also technical director or GM? Maybe BA will assume the larger technical director/GM job only next season and is talking to Sigi about coaching RBNY? Are there any assistant coaches, other than Robert, that seem to be in the till for head coaching positions? As much as I think Archer is right that this stuff is probably usually done over the phone and by the GMs and not the coaches face to face, it would seem some trade or some such is most likely. Honestly, the one that makes the most sense, to me anyway, is whoever mentioned Danny being signed by MLS on the condition of a trade to NY, or something similar.
Apparently, according to "sources" only known to Ives, Danny didn't like MLS's offer and is going to Italy to ride the bench for a second division Italian team. Maybe he would rather ride the pine for Il Bruce than some Italian guy.
Bruce's friend Micky called him up Monday morning. Said 'Bruce, I got some legitimate work for us.' Fast-forward an hour. Bruce is outside the 42nd floor of Marriott Hotel picking up some extra cash washing windows when he peeks in the window. Who is it? Alexi Lalas. Half a club sandwich looks like it's getting stale on his desk. Fast-forward 10 minutes. Bruce is finishing up the sandwich and everything's cool. Alexi is laughing at something and talking on his cell phone. Bruce is rubbing his hands together, crumbs fall to the floor, his jowls are undulating like a French bulldog. He's preparing to get back to those windows. Alexi says, 'Hold on Bruce. It's been a while since we've had a sit-down. Let's talk about Martino.' 'What about that piece of shit?' 'He's can suck a golf ball through a garden hose.' 'Everybody knows that, but Alexi, we're in New York. We have that everywhere, EV-REE-WHERE.' 'OK Bruce, how about a date.' 'You and me? OK fine. Let's go hit the Broadway discount booths.' 'No let's go to Columbus Ohio's Shadowbox Theatre.' The End.