You know you are a latin futbol player if...

Discussion in 'CONCACAF' started by FenoFutbol, Jan 3, 2007.

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  1. FenoFutbol

    FenoFutbol Red Card

    Dec 12, 2005
    Aguilucho Villa
    1. You speak Spanish, Portugues, Italian, Latin, Rumanian?

    2. You know who Maradona, Pele, Di Stefano, Valderrama, Hugo Sanchez, Etcheverry, Zamorano, Cubias, Hagi, Romario, Bebeto, Cafu, Roberto Carlos, Tevez, Palermo, Hierro, Batistuta, Kempes, Franchescoli, Pagliuca, Cappello, Pekerman, Parreira, Scolari, Lexemburgo, Bora, Calero, Basile, Saviola, Raul, Butragueno, Baggio, Maldini, Rossi, Baresi, Simone, Albertini, Zoff, C. Ronaldo, Ronaldo, Ronaldinho, Donadoni, Vieri, Del Piero, V Bahia, Couto, Quaresma, Do Santos, Messi, Magico Gonzalez, Wanchope, Suazo, Valdez, Higuita, Chilavert, Cardozo are...

    3. You dont score goals, you score golazos.

    4. Futbol to you is a religion, is a way of living, is your passion and one only love.

    5. People that doesnt play or know futbol is the most weird people on earth...

    6. Coaches and fans love you, soccer players learn from you, and EPL fans hate you.

    7. You have celebrated a goal with your fans, running so fast that you didnt see the soccer ref giving you a red car for taking off your shirt and showing your "caliente" skin color to the ladies.

    8. Unless a Coach tells you to play with balls and to dribble that "dumb" defender that is following you everywhere on the field (and try to get him red carded) you really dont pay attention to what the coach says, unless he is Fabio Capello of course ;-)

    9. You always dream playing for Real Madrid, Boca Juniors, or AC Milan. You always saw yourself winning a World Championship with Brazil, Argentina, Italy, Spain, Uruguay, Mexico (Under 17)?

    10. You dont believe that Salvadoran dude that says "Magico Gonzalez has been compared to Maradona, Pele, Cruff, Ronaldinho, Zico, and not to Hugo, and that Jorge is the best player that ever came out of concacaf"

    11. You will never miss any of these games... not even your wife birthday is more important than an Argentina vrs Brazil, Italy vrs Germany, Spain vrs Argentina, Mexico vrs Argentina, Brazil vrs Italy, Brazil vrs Portugal, Real Madrid vrs Barcelona, Boca vrs River, America vrs Chivas, Penarol vrs Velez, Colo vrs Pachuca, Honduras vrs Costa Rica, El Salvador vrs Puerto Rico =)

    12. You have at least one member of your family that played pro, one dude from school that played for the national team, and one dude frin your country that plays in La Liga or Il Calccio.

    13. Your granpa tells you that no other player in the world was better than Di Stefano, not even Pele or Maradona, and some of your old uncles backed that up.

    14. Your uncle think Puscas, Cruff, Rud Gullit, Platini and Zidane played like Latins.

    15. Roberto Baggio is still your hero even though he missed that pk in the Rose Bowl.

    16. To you, number 10 is a number reserved for the best of the best, and if you ever have the chance to weare el "Diez" you better know how to show style and class on the field. The number diez is reserved for Maradona calibers from el Barrio.

    17. Anglo dudes always ask you how to do that move... and joke around wish telling you "I wish I was that cool"

    18. Blond chearleaders think you're have sexy lips =)

    19. You have white cleats and something to hold your dark long hair =)

    20. You dont understand ping pong EPL, and American football... I mean MLS.

    21. Your Coach tells you all the time to pass the ball.

    22. An Anglo Coach take you out any time you do a taquito or a sombrerito.

    23. You understand that you use diving as protection of the dumb uneskilled player that is always playing dirty trying to break your leg.

    24. You have celebrated a goal dancing or feeling the latin "rithm."

    25. Your parents punish you anytime you failed a test with not going to the soccer practice.

    26. You had this old dude trying to fight you in your barrios field bc you made him look dumb after a tunelito in front of everybody.

    27. Ladies love, they think your def Mr. Right.

    28. You have posters of C. Ronaldo, Ronaldo, Ronaldinho, Maradona, Pele, Buffon, Casillas, Redondo, Cienfuegos and your national team in your room.

    29. Your whole family is Catholic but you really dont know what you are...

    30. Bring a soccer ball with you everywhere.

    31. Anything you watch ESPN Streetbasketball, you feel really familiar with barrio futbol.

    32. Roberto Baggio, Palermo, Valderrama and Etcheverry were not into fashion, they were just cool like that.

    33. In the soccer field youre the classies, the hotter, the smartest, the "educated" the "opressive" the stylist, the delicated, the best looking, the "scientist" the "talented" the "civilized," the sophisticated, bad ass, the rambo... i mean the hero, and the "supremacist" :cool:

    Who wants to keep it going???
     
  2. balatonsurfer

    balatonsurfer BigSoccer Yellow Card

    Jun 21, 2005
    Galbitown
    34. You dive more than Jaques Cousteau.
     
  3. FenoFutbol

    FenoFutbol Red Card

    Dec 12, 2005
    Aguilucho Villa
    35. You think EPL players are dumb and uneskilled.

    36. You make fun of NFL players for being fat and ugly.
     
  4. leg_breaker

    leg_breaker Member

    Dec 23, 2005
    Oh god it's FenoFutbol, krayzie's right hand man in bigsoccer affairs.
     
  5. CeltTexan

    CeltTexan Member+

    Sep 21, 2000
    Houston, TX USA
    Club:
    Houston Dynamo
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    37. You failed your own family's language when taught in High School and missed the big match
     
  6. CherryBomb

    CherryBomb Red Card

    Oct 27, 2006
    La La Land
    So much hilarity here. I can't digest it all just yet. I'm going to have to just work through it bit by bit.
     
  7. Intru

    Intru Member

    Mar 16, 2006
    Rochester, NY
    Club:
    Puerto Rico Islanders
    When did Puerto Rico ever play El Salvador?
     
  8. El Chuma

    El Chuma BigSoccer Supporter

    Sep 17, 2005
    San Diego
    Club:
    New England Revolution
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    OMG Repped and True!!!
     
  9. Latin Pride

    Latin Pride Member

    Aug 1, 2004
    In your house
    Club:
    Olimpia Asuncion
    Nat'l Team:
    --other--
    http://www.rsssf.com/tablese/elsal-intres.html

    DATE VERSUS VENUE SCORE COMPETITION
    05/08/1984 Puerto Rico Puerto Rico 3-0 Wcq
    29/07/1984 Puerto Rico El Salvador 5-0 Wcq
    12/06/1966 Puerto Rico Puerto Rico 2-2 CAG Group


    I dont see why this would be considered an important match tho:confused:
     
  10. Intru

    Intru Member

    Mar 16, 2006
    Rochester, NY
    Club:
    Puerto Rico Islanders
    LOL Maybe because its the only team with beaten in the past 10 years LOL
     
  11. FenoFutbol

    FenoFutbol Red Card

    Dec 12, 2005
    Aguilucho Villa

    I was actually making fun of my own country bc FESFUT is so low now that even Nicaragua can take on ES... I wouldnt be surprised that we get beat from Puerto Rico too.

    Puerto Rico beating ES is really something new to me, as far as I know Puerto Rico is good at beisbol or basket or whatever they play there. I didnt even know they had a soccer team :confused: They're good at music for sure, regueton is the shit :cool:

    Back in the days it was mostly Honduras and ES, we even had a war called the "war of futbol" and a lot crazy things happened. When I was a kid I remember we were the only central americans to say "we made it to the WC 2 times" bc CR wasnt any good back then, everything was ES and Honduras or ES and Mexico.

    I think we are the only ones that took Mexico out of a world cup in Concacaf... I think. Now CR took our place as the best in CA.
     
  12. CherryBomb

    CherryBomb Red Card

    Oct 27, 2006
    La La Land
    I have so many faves here. Here's a couple that stand out:

    "23. You understand that you use diving as protection of the dumb uneskilled player that is always playing dirty trying to break your leg."

    "19. You have white cleats and something to hold your dark long hair =)"


    It's like a smorgasbord though. I dip into one bit then get distracted by another. I can't stay focused on the whole. It's like Christmas.
     
  13. CherryBomb

    CherryBomb Red Card

    Oct 27, 2006
    La La Land
    What footballers speak Latin? Vatican City? Your priest?

    Even this one little bit, right off the bat... it's too big to digest.
     
  14. Intru

    Intru Member

    Mar 16, 2006
    Rochester, NY
    Club:
    Puerto Rico Islanders
    Yes I know how ES use to be, and they have gone pretty low but atleast you can say remember when... PR is just emerging as a futbol playing nation even if we have had a team for almost 80 year, its always been under funded, corrupted and overlooked. But now you can see it growing in almost any spot on the Island almost as fast as basketball. Baseball Is dead in PR, basketball and then futbol are the new top sports. I hope that in the future both our teams get the glory they deserve. Hey if River Plate is considering putting a team here we must be getting better :D
     
  15. FlanInTheFace

    FlanInTheFace New Member

    Aug 3, 2005
    New Jersey
    win
     
  16. retsniv

    retsniv New Member

    Jul 21, 2005
    NORCAL
    I don't like that list. I'm a defender, I wear black copas, score few goals, hate divers and diving, and its probably me trying to break your legs. But I do have the long hair and the "caliente" skin color.
     
  17. FenoFutbol

    FenoFutbol Red Card

    Dec 12, 2005
    Aguilucho Villa
    Its funny when you have a white kid trying to teach a latino his own latin history.

    Ok, let me guess. White dude that spent 5 years "fighting for freedom" somewhere in the middle east. Made d's in high school. Redneck flag in his room.

    Maybe a neonazi fron Gringolandia?

    Latin? Was the language of the Roman Impire which dominated most of Europe except for Germany and Russia.

    Most of Europe including France and Greece have strong influence of the "Romantic" language and culture. Castilla the founder of Castellano or Espanol was the name of the city of with IndoEuropean roots "Hispania." All hispania was part of Rome and most of the tribes in Southern Europe, thefore we have a "Romantic" culture all over Latin America, take a look of the arquitecture of all latin america. We mixed a lot of the Moors from Southern Spain with Roman Cathedrals and stuff, I mean do you even know what a Cathedral is?

    Rome also dominated Ireland and Scotland, therefore you have a good stablished catholic church in those countries.

    Do a reasearch you dummy.

    Do they ever teach history in gringolandia?

    What else do you need to know about latins?
     
  18. CherryBomb

    CherryBomb Red Card

    Oct 27, 2006
    La La Land
    God I love you Feno. You're just what I need right now.

    So first of all, are you Italian? Are you of Roman decent? Well then you're White as me aren't you then? You're a White man (but you're not are you?) You know of course that The Roman Empire was what Adolph Hitler referred to as the first of four Reichs (his being the third?) Or did you?

    And just btw it's spelled "Empire," not "Impire." But surely you would know that if you were of European decent, and not just some Puerto Rican. Funny I should mention European decent, because to have anything at all to do with the Roman Empire, that would be an absolute, unequivocal prerequisite. I'm pretty sure you don't qualify.

    As it happens, I'm of English decent. Now my first recorded relatives were technically Norman invaders, but since then they've been all English. Now we both know that Rome ruled England up to Hadrian's Wall at least. They even named London (Londinium) among other things. So it's reasonable to assume that they left some of their seed behind, probably still floating around the English gene pool to this day, however benign. So I guess in a way I have to have some Roman in me somewhere.

    So, that being the case, how in the world do you possibly think you have more to do with The Roman Empire, and "Latin" than "White dude," just because you were taught Spanish by invaders who hated you worse than insects? I'm at a complete and utter loss as to how that entitles you claim decendance of The Roman Empire.

    Nazis. Funny you should mention them along with The Roman Empire. It's well known of course that the ultimate goal of the Romans was to create a society as perfectly disciplined as we now find in "Latino" countries.

    Next...



    You make it sound as if the Roman Empire came from Latin America, and was taking over White land. LOL. The Romans WERE Europeans you imbecile! In fact, they were the one's who first developed the idea of Europa being a land o rule over others (you being the "others" here, if you haven't caught on quite yet.)

    Yes. You have been dominated, enslaved, and humiliated by a country (Spain) who was previously conquered and dominated by The Roman Empire.

    This makes you feel proud? This makes you feel more apart of Europe than actual White people? That's like African-Americans of slave decent boasting about their proud English heritage! You, my friend, are delusional and completely moronic.

    1) I can't even begin to explain to you just how moronic your take on post-Roman Spanish history is. "We mixed a lot of the Moors from Southern Spain with Roman Cathedrals and stuff." Surely you must be taking the piss.

    2) Romans didn't have cathedrals. That came later. And the architectural styles you envisage as somehow a result of Latin American (!) genius, aren't even spanish. They're Gothic. I'd discuss the Goths here but I'm already way outside your comprehension level.

    By "dominated Ireland and Scotland" of course I'm sure you meant "dominated England but Ireland and Scotland were too remote and mostly not worth our effort, while the Welsh hid out in, errr, Wales." Of course that's what you meant Einstein.

    And I love your theory of The Roman Empire being so gung ho about spreading Christianity (I say "Christianity" because Catholicism as we know it didn't exist during their time.) It's no like that and uncontrolled immigration broke the back of the Empire, allowing the German tribes to finally rape and plunder it once and for all.

    "Do a reasearch you dummy." Priceless. :D

    One thing. How can a Hispanic be so completely idiotic as to believe his ancestry is that of the Roman Empire?



    It's funny alright. Downright hilarious if you ask me.
     
  19. CherryBomb

    CherryBomb Red Card

    Oct 27, 2006
    La La Land
    Well that explains a lot. Perhaps, if they were better parents, they would have put you in a special needs class. Or at least tried to beat a clue into your nappy head with your tasteless white cleats.

    I'm sure there's something they could have done to prevent you turning out a complete embarrassment. Extreme situations require extreme measures.
     
  20. rey arturo

    rey arturo New Member

    Jul 1, 2006
    Both you and Fenofutbol are moronic idiots. Get a life.
     
  21. Latin Pride

    Latin Pride Member

    Aug 1, 2004
    In your house
    Club:
    Olimpia Asuncion
    Nat'l Team:
    --other--
    Actually i think you guys misunderstand those results, El Salvador actually won those games 3-0, 5-0, and tied 2-2.
     
  22. Latin Pride

    Latin Pride Member

    Aug 1, 2004
    In your house
    Club:
    Olimpia Asuncion
    Nat'l Team:
    --other--
    wow you mean futbol is actually bigger then baseball in PR right now??:eek:
     
  23. FenoFutbol

    FenoFutbol Red Card

    Dec 12, 2005
    Aguilucho Villa
    [​IMG]

    Dude youre totally right, my brothers and I have been humilliated and slaved for many years by Spaniards, also my father whos also a lawyer. :D
     
  24. NachoNation

    NachoNation Member+

    Jun 19, 2005
    GOAT Puzzle
    Nat'l Team:
    Mexico
    This thread is retarded.

    By the way, don't pay CherryBomb any mind. He thinks all latin american, hispanics (whatever word it is you like) want to be white. Everything he reads is then interpreted in such fashion when there is nothing there.
     
  25. MoRado

    MoRado New Member

    Feb 6, 2004
    San José. Costa Rica
    Club:
    Deportivo Saprissa
    Nat'l Team:
    Costa Rica
    agreed...

    Should we bye-bye this thread?
    who says yes?
     

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