You know you might be a FSW addict if...

Discussion in 'TV, Satellite & Radio' started by wjarrettc, Dec 1, 2004.

  1. Nicodemus145

    Nicodemus145 Member

    Jul 10, 2003
    AL
    that Grandmother I'd Like To F. on the bowflex commercials
    "How does this forty-year-old grandmother stay in such great shape? Bowflex!"
    i prefer the term G-Milf myself. one day in the future it'll be Great G-Milf.
    ugh... bordering on necrophilia there... :D :) [​IMG]
     
  2. cleansheetbsc

    cleansheetbsc Member+

    Mar 17, 2004
    Club:
    --other--
    Nico,

    Lets get the facts straight. Any 40 year-old grandmother can look as good as the woman in the bowflex commercial.

    Grandma, in fact, is 50 years-old and has a body like "this." And she owes it all to Bowflex...and her 25 year-old himbo pool boy.
     
  3. JTorres

    JTorres New Member

    Mar 2, 2000
    The Globe-Chicago
    Ohhhhhhh!
    I understand now - I'm pretty slow at times, I thought Bowflex had a new gizmo that was called the GILF.
     
  4. cleansheetbsc

    cleansheetbsc Member+

    Mar 17, 2004
    Club:
    --other--
    ...You are ready to AK-47 the room when a "Winfuel" commercial comes on.

    Thanks Junior. WTF is Winfuel? A vitamin? A new Fox channel for auto sports? Still trying to figure it out. Anyway, just put on a soccer game.
     
  5. Nicodemus145

    Nicodemus145 Member

    Jul 10, 2003
    AL
    Best way to begin a commercial:

    "Menopause!"
     
  6. wjarrettc

    wjarrettc Member
    Staff Member

    Oct 1, 2002
    Cliffs of Insanity
    Club:
    Carolina Railhawks
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    ...you answer your Mom's question of "When are you going to bring the kids to see Grandma" with "When are you going to upgrade to DISH 180 so I can watch FSC when we visit.
     
  7. Nicodemus145

    Nicodemus145 Member

    Jul 10, 2003
    AL
    lol. my mom caved and added FSC to her package b/c i kept leaving early on holidays.
    after going to the us v guatemala game in b'ham though, i think my dad understands...
     
  8. cleansheetbsc

    cleansheetbsc Member+

    Mar 17, 2004
    Club:
    --other--
    Wow. You just hit a nerve with me. Inlaws don't have ANY cable or satalliete.

    Every Boxing Day sucks. 3 EPL games are on FSC, and I am watching Arthur with my kids on PBS.
     
  9. Cassano

    Cassano Member

    Jul 16, 2004
    Club:
    AC Milan
    Nat'l Team:
    Italy
    Yeah, I thought it was some car gasoline when I first saw the commercial until they actually showed the bottle of vitamins. I would like a scientific explanation of how a vitamin helps you to win...
     
  10. ddavenport

    ddavenport New Member

    Apr 11, 2005
    Your sexual fantasies involve Michelle Lissel...
     
  11. . . . you wonder who that chick is that he bumps into who is so hot she makes the black and white turn color

    . . . the words "she might be a good footballer, her dad played" have crossed your lips when contemplating whom to put on your 4 year-old daughter's soccer team next fall

    . . . you've grown impatient explaining to people that the First Division is really the third, and the Championship is not the top league.

    . . . you keep telling your wife how hot she must think Jose Antonio Reyes is, then make a big show of "allowing" her to watch Arsenal. You also assume chicks must find Frank Lampard pretty hot, even though there is no objective basis for it, other than the fact he can kick a ball really hard from really far away and score.

    . . . you met an Englishman on a domestic flight last summer and when he told you he was a Leeds fan, you looked him in the eye and sincerely expressed your condolences

    or you take the opportunity to catch up on things you've been neglecting, like baseball. Or soccer from other countries.


    Absolutely a great first post, f&u.
     
  12. Liv'poolFaninAZ

    Liv'poolFaninAZ New Member

    Oct 24, 2004
    Glendale, Arizona
    :mad: You want to absolutely KILL someone when the channel, for some stupid reason is off the air! Is anyone else having this problem? I'm in AZ and my carrier is COX, I've continually had problems with the channel blacking out when my other 200 channels for which I have no use for are all right! It first happened this weekend when I was going to sit down to watch River vs. Newells all I got was a black screen! I wanted to KILL EVERYONE!!!!!!!! and now as I was going to watch Fox Soccer USA it went away again! WTF? :mad:
     
  13. quentinc

    quentinc New Member

    Jan 3, 2005
    Annapolis, MD
    I had problems during the Euro's with my dig. cable this summer, and that sucked.
     
  14. Nicodemus145

    Nicodemus145 Member

    Jul 10, 2003
    AL
    All work and no FSC makes Jack a dull boy [​IMG]
     
  15. Nicodemus145

    Nicodemus145 Member

    Jul 10, 2003
    AL
    saw on cnn yesterday that bowflex settled out of court over faulty equipment that injured people: chipped teeth, hurniated disks, and neck problems. that new gizmo's called the GOOF
     
  16. JTorres

    JTorres New Member

    Mar 2, 2000
    The Globe-Chicago
    ... you start wondering if the Bowflex grandma would be a good fit for the holding midfield role while the Bowflex Treadclimber woman would work best as striker.
     
  17. wcgcapone

    wcgcapone Member

    Feb 6, 2001
    Denver, CO, USA
    Club:
    Colorado Rapids
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    You wonder why Kentucky has two teams...
     
  18. Cassano

    Cassano Member

    Jul 16, 2004
    Club:
    AC Milan
    Nat'l Team:
    Italy
    ...You can name every anchor on the Fox Sports World Report
     
  19. TheMutts

    TheMutts New Member

    May 19, 2002
    Pittsburgh
    you wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night with the words " F S C!" rolling around your head
     
  20. Cassano

    Cassano Member

    Jul 16, 2004
    Club:
    AC Milan
    Nat'l Team:
    Italy
    you refer to the penalty spot as the "Charity Circle"....
     
  21. Nicodemus145

    Nicodemus145 Member

    Jul 10, 2003
    AL
    well boys, after all my posts on this thread, i've decided to hang up my remote. I could barely afford this as it is, and the coverage just wasn't worth it. everything is on PPV now. it used to be worth it, being mine was the only tv in town w/ soccer. but it's gone downhill for me this past season, and I haven't seen the shift to FSC making much of an impact. I'd write what I don't like about it, but I'll just get called ungrateful, or a FSC employee will say 'i'm doin my best, damit!' So I'm just gonna say goodbye; no renewal for me next fall.

    Goodbye for now FSW and FSC. I'll see your replays at the bar from time to time. And maybe we'll meet again when I have more money. Adios and thanks.
     
  22. buckeye5

    buckeye5 New Member

    Feb 15, 2004
    DC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    ....you wonder if Win Fuel's "Junior" is someone FSC watchers are suppossed to know? Whatever Win Fuel is? And whoever Junior is?
     
  23. quentinc

    quentinc New Member

    Jan 3, 2005
    Annapolis, MD
    You're able to grasp everything on the screen during Sky Sports News.
     
  24. wrenmj

    wrenmj New Member

    Apr 19, 2005
    Texas
    Club:
    Chelsea FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    1. you catch yourself actually watching mls games.

    2. the FFF theme jumps in your head each time you walk into a room and see two numpties sitting on a couch.

    3. your assimilation is complete and you can now correctly promounce and spell the names of east european football teams.

    4. war? what war?

    5. the FFF set is your point of reference for interior decorating tips.

    6. max bretos' hair no longer gets on your nerves.

    7. the "nuns playing football" clip during the World Football Show makes perfect sense to you.

    8. a bad mourinho, beckham, or dale earnhart jr. impression becomes a staple in your day.

    9. you can skillfully navigate the words butt, kaka, and fabregas into the same conversation without once mentioning the word ass.

    10. eva longoria? who the hell is she?
     
  25. Kryptonite

    Kryptonite BS XXV

    Apr 10, 1999
    Columbus
    Club:
    Columbus Crew
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Yeah. Except the cricket. Terms like "overs" are still new to me, although I do know what the wicket is.


    Here's my latest...

    You know you might be a FSW addict if...you have a countdown timer on your cell phone starting at 90 hours. When it hits 0 hours, 0 minutes and 0 seconds is the start of when the 2 hour appointment is for when the cable guy comes to swap the box.

    You kiss your box once a day because you're so happy it's finally in your house.
     

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