Who is United's #1 rival?

Metroturds

 

The Metros are the only historically consistent rival upon which all DC United supporters can agree. They are DC United's rival.

That doesn't mean we can't hate other teams. Personally, I hate LA, Seattle and I'm none-too-fond of these NYCFC people either.

Now, you could make an argument about LA being an old DC United rival. They were back in the old days, but that's faded in recent years as the teams' fortunes diverged. I'd love to see that old rivalry revived, but until we improve drastically, that's probably not in the cards.

Finally, and maybe I shouldn't admit this, with NYCFC coming into the league, I've found myself feeling a little sorry for the Red Bull fans. They are now officially second fiddle. Actually, it started before then. It was Petke's firing. I want Red Bull to be good rivals, but I don't like seeing their fans and that team f'cked over and passed over in quite this way. Maybe it's because they're a legacy team like us, and I want legacy teams respected. But I feel like I'm softening towards the Metros a bit. That team and those fans deserve better ...

... as long as better doesn't come at our expense.

 

Rivalry & hate are 2 separate things. While rivalries need hate going both ways, I'm satisfied with keeping my hate without it being returned.
My hates
Red Bulls
Galaxy
Rivalries
Don't care

 

1) Chicago. Our greatest playoffs rival. They've thwarted us so many times that I've lost count. They're the mountain that we have to climb. They're the guys who cause C. Gomez to lose his saliva. C.J. Brown.

2) MetroStars. But, beating the Pink Cows is like taking candy from a baby. On the other hand, "you just got burned, Jonny Walker."

3) Revs. Especially during the thugged up Steve Nicols era. Matt Ries. Jay Heaps. Taylor Twellman.

4) Galaxatives. Cobi Jones. Landycakes. Golden Balls. Need I say more?

5) Rave Green, FC. Fat, drunk & stupid is no way to go through life, son.

 

Well, I put "other" which means all of them. Whenever DCU is playing, that opponent is the #1 rival and I want to see their team suffer career ending injuries, see the coach's head explode and hear the weeping and lamentations of their womenfolk as that pathetic excuse for a "rival" is put out of its misery. Clear enough?

 

Red Bulls and LA are and have always been considered "ye olde enemie(s)"

 

That thug was Ric Flair dirty.

Anyway, my list:
1. Pink Cows
2. Chicago: CJ Brown, playoff eliminations, Cuatomac Blanco,
3. Galaxy: 5 MLS Cups, Beckham, LD,
4. Seattle: "everything" is better up there
5. Revs

 

Voted metros, but I think all yalls answers are just swell

 

Who voted for udder? And Why?

 

You are ten million percent wrong. Their sufferings are the elixir of life.

Also, LA can blow me.

 

Nagoya Grampus 8! I'll never rest until we get vengeance against them. That's right, I went all the way back to the 20th century.

Next is Chelsea. Then Leeds United, Getafe and Belgium (The entire country, not the national team- miserable fat Belgian bastards). And I still hate Darren Sawatzky.

Honestly though, the only thing approaching a rivalry is Jersey. But we don't have real rivalries.

 

I heard that about you. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

 

21 votes for Metro, second place has 2 votes right now.

Have to agree it has always been Metro/RBNY for me and even if they go through another name change still be my most hated rival. Everyone else is circumstantial or event based, but hate of Metro goes on.

 

Very much agreed. The saddest thing is that Red Bull GmbH did this to themselves and to the Red Bulls fans. I just hope that Red Bull GmbH* will sell the RBNY organization and stadium to someone who can be bothered to ask American fans what they care about. Red Bull GmbH's first major, major, major mistake was in intentionally not getting that in our country, a team's nickname is the same as the organization's name. They also refused to understand that naming a team after its owner/sponsor is a huge turnoff to American fans.

The next major mistake they have made over, and over, and over again is meddling with roster decisions and approaching it by only splashing the cash like in the Austrian and German teams. We all know that in a salary capped league like MLS, how well your roster fits together in the coach's game plan is more important than raw talent because every team has approximately the same amount of that.

Now that NYCFC exists, no previously unaligned New York area soccer fan will go to watch the "corporate" team, regardless of the actual facts on the ground. Loudmouthed, provincial, shit-talking, self-fellating New Yorkers see the "New York City" name as a reference to the five boroughs rather than the reference to Manchester City that it actually is. They also see the light blue jerseys as referencing the blue in their city flag and an old subway logo. Just dumb luck on City Football Group's part but New Yorkers are eating it up regardless.

Also, for those pretentious, douchey, self-fellating New Yorkers, playing at Yankees Stadium is actually an advantage because they can claim they're cool for watching a game at a facility that their self-fellating geriatric mainstream sports media refers to as "hallowed ground." They also all know how to get there already. As stupid as everyone else in the United States thinks that complaining about taking one subway to cross a river to get a stadium versus taking a different subway and crossing a different river for the same amount of time, it's clearly a thing that pretentious, douchey, self-fellating New Yorkers use as part of their spending decisions. It's stupid but it's the reality in the New York area. Don Garber, a native New Yorker, was completely right about the New York market and how it would play out, regardless of how stupid it is to anyone who takes half a second to think it through.

I want to keep the Red Bulls as our main rival. I also want them to be healthy and have a good fanbase so they'll be around for decades for our fun rivalry and so we can keep celebrating United beating them in a fair soccer game. I actually respect Red Bull fans as they've stuck through some absolute blunders and disrespect from Red Bull GmbH. We won't ever be primary rivals with NYC as they're new and it'll be impossible to have the special shared history we have with NYRB. Philadelphia is a better rival than NYCFC because they view us as such. Also, Philadelphian trash-talk has a certain amount of authenticity to it that New Yorker self-fellating simply lacks, to be polite. Or, maybe we can hope that Baltimore gets a team some day.

*GmbH is the German equivalent of LLC, Red Bull GmbH is the formal name of the company that owns NYRB.

 

I voted NJRB as well. The hate just runs too deep for too long there...

I giggled a bit while in Houston's airport yesterday on the way back home. Highlights from NYCFC's win were playing and the announcer said, "It looks like New York is finally embracing soccer."

 

How are the sounders even on this list? I guess this is like the debates about "group of death" in major competitions...everybody has different criteria

The only teams that are legit rivals, in my opinion, are NYNJ / CHI / NE

Of those I only hate RB right now. It took me years to forget the gutwrenching pain of losing to the Fire in 98. Winning MLS cup in 04 was almost as good as knocking the Revs out the previous game. Until Heaps took over i genuinely HATED that whole organization.

Doesnt seem to have spilled over into the stands but I'd consider Philly a rival based on the way our teams play each other. I dont really hate them because they are too weak to take seriously.

I dont think anybody else in DCs fanbase hated them but my least favorite team/coach/organzation in the past decade was Houston. I detested them on every level and could only tamp down the hate long enough to hope they beat NE in the final a few times.

I didnt like LA but have never hated them. I hated specific players (Jones, Sarvas) but never the team itself.

 

I am trying very hard to imagine "self-fellation," but I can't imagine it's widespread, even in our largest city, apart from a few yogis and maybe some Cirque de Soleil performers.

 

I counted only 5 "self-fellating"s. Must be Lent.

 

Yeah, I got a little ranty there.

I've known quite a few New Yorkers who verbally do that all the time, especially when it comes to inane comments about how much something is better than you because it's in/from New York, like that's some sort of fundamental axiom of the universe.

 

The MetroBulls are falling apart. Come on . . . can anyone really get excited about playing Bergen County's team. Fanwise, NYCFC and the Cosmos are crushing the Austrian Energy Drink Team! Ha, ha ha - that's so Metro!

 

NYRB. And I'll enjoy watching them crumble.

 

Since our team has been owned by monsters like Philip Anschutz and Christian Laettner, I'm not comfortable throwing stones.