The things we hear returns - 2018 edition

Oh, it's definitely a put down. "Thanks for coming out."

 

"You know, you don't sweat much for a fat guy."

 

"Well, you're welcome!"
or
"Thanks for having me!"

Depending on how the "Thanks" was offered. Both said with a smile, or course.

 

As someone said, "You get so much farther with a gun and a smile than you do with just a gun."

 

Hmm..I politely disagree that it was incorrect....even by the letter of the law.
It falls into the same category as too many players on the field.
In such a scenario, the caution is for "Entering the field of play without permission". This is the case even if there has been many restarts since the cautionable offence happens. IE: Player enters the field. Play happens maybe for many minutes with several restarts, THEN the referee becomes aware and issues the caution.
In my scenario, there is no difference. Once I became aware, I issued the caution.

I could take it further. Perhaps the referee only becomes aware that a player is not wearing shin guards several minutes into the match. Same thing.

So in summary, I did not make up my own rules. I applied the Laws of the Game as they stand, upheld the spirit of the game and succeeded with effective game management.

 

Defender trips opponent dribbling ball, opponent stumbles and loses control. I blow for the foul.

Incredulous defender: "What was that for?!"
"Tripping," I reply.
"But he didn't fall down!"

I wasn't aware that was a requirement....

 

After whistling for a handling in the PA a defender passed by to tell me, "Handling in the penalty area has always been an indirect kick." I almost had to roll up my jaw as it hit the floor.

 

There are those I encourage to become refs, and those I block in Arbiter before they ever take the test.

 

Between the girls and boys games tonight we headed down to the restrooms by the baseball field. The baseball parents were working some brats on a big oil drum grill.

"Man those smell good."
"Have some."
"Better not. We just finished the girls game but now we have to go back and do the boys."
"Did our girls win?"
"No sorry, they lost 2 to 1."
"Then this is not the referee food station."

 

That's why the foul is called for tripping or attempting to trip an opponent.

 

I am not sure if this goes under here or the "Build Outlines For Fun and Profit," but here it is:

Every year, our local adult league asks our local association to send someone to explain the new law changes to them. We usually send our instructor. At our last association meeting, our instructor said that he had to go to the next league meeting and explain the buildout line to them (that they don't need to use).

 

"You can't call him Offside, he was going for the ball!"

Thanks, Coach.

 

A couple weeks ago I had a first. I was working a development Academy game when I sent a player off for a second caution. As he was leaving the field of play, he turned to me "hey referee…" and makes a gesture of his thumb flicking off of the bottom of his chin. I included it in the report but what a dunce. I guess he didn't feel like playing for the next couple games......

 

If you don’t mind, what age?

 

Sounds like someone's been reading Shakespeare in school.

 

Nah I don't U18/19.

Right?!!! I was thinking the same thing.

"Do you bite your thumb at us good sir?" "Why I do bite my thumb at a capulet!"

 

Just read an email from my assignor. He said that literally half of our registered referees are not doing games.

 

At the beginning of April I spoke to a pretty big local assignor who assigns like some 7000 games a year. He was telling me in a good year he uses around 45% of his referee population at least 3x. Funny bc I haven't done any games for him yet. But he assigned me this weekend.

I know all his referees are USSF certified for the current year (he won't use non-certified guys) but half of them (like me don't work hardly enough for him lol).

 

U9 game, solo. A couple gems. Green coach sent a player to be a captain because he was the birthday boy. I asked him when his birthday was and he said Friday. I said mine was Wednesday. I asked how old he was and he said he turned 10. He said "I won't ask how old you are, but I know you are WAY more than 10." I think he had a bit too much tone in that "WAY."

As I was getting my watches, whistles, etc out of the bag, a white player saw me get my red card out of the wallet and put it in my back pocket. He said "You have a red card for these games?" I said "Better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it." He said "That's smart."

 

U14B game. Player on green slams his shoulder into the back of player on white. I blow the whistle for the foul.
Parent: "Oh come on! That was shoulder to shoulder!"

 

Working MRL weekend with same crew all day. We're at halftime of the last of three games today and a mom from the previous is cutting through the space between the fields to get to the next row. She stops to say what a great job we did and thanked us for coming. As she was leaving she says "by the way, some of those other moms over there wanted to know if you guys had made a referee calendar yet, because they wanted one if you had." She definitely wasn't talking about me, but we made the center from the last game blush good and red.

 

Had my first sarcastic slow clap ever! I figured I was due. End of a contentious varsity boys game, cautioned a player from each team due to them being unsporting to each other. One goes off quietly, the other takes a couple of steps towards me and claps and says “good job, ref. You’re really great.” One of the more satisfying send offs of the season.

 

Sub coming in: "What am I???"
Captain: "... human?"