south carolina youth soccer wants parents to be quiet for the entire month of september. http://www.postandcourier.com/sport...cle_e8f4ab2e-61bc-11e7-b2f4-27fb4a8a3a75.html
Clubs here do silent weeks every summer. It's very effective. If a club, group, state, whatever is having such trouble with parents, then maybe a month of quiet isn't such a bad thing...
When my daughter played ODP they had a very strict sideline policy. It was't 100% silent but limited to "golf claps" for goals and no shouting at all and no specific name or number call outs - basically just saying "good job" or "good play" if anything and nothing during run of play. Any violation and your kid sat - period. It was refreshing...
I disagree with punishing a kid because of his or her parent(s)/guardian(s) actions. I'm guessing the LOTG doesn't say anything about ejecting a player because of the actions of a fan.
Substitutions are unlimited for ODP, nothing about ejecting a player. Sadly, the only way to get through to some parents is by limiting the kids playing time. Not saying I agree (and I never caused my daughter to have to sit) but for those that did it usually took one incident and no more issues from that parent.
I always wonder about punishments like this. What happens when the person calling out to Amanda isn't her parent? Or isn't a relative? Or isn't even a supporter of her team? Maybe the benefits far outweigh the potential for abuse, but there will always be people trying to game the system.
It's ODP and the events I attended the coaches knew the parents. It wasn't a problem as we all followed the silent sidelines - I think the threat and very occasional follow through got the point across.
My feelings about this sort of thing is so mixed... Of course youth referees should be protected from harassment from adults. Of course violence should not be incited. Of course referees of any age should never be touched or threatened. But I think back to a youth tournament my son played in San Antonio a few years back. About a third of the teams were sponsored teams from Mexico, and mot of the rest from Texas. The format was ties at end of regulation went straight to kftm. So there were a number of shootouts where people from adjacent fields would stop to watch once their game was over, resulting in 100-200 people watching. The fan obnoxiousness was truly next level. The age was u17, and pretty much nothing was off the table. "You're a f*cking loser!" "You're the worst! " "Your mother's a (insert whatever)" yelled at the kids as they would go up to kick. And not just from dads. Moms and kids were just as vocal. Then the next event is a region weekend in suburban Memphis where civility and calm were the rule. When I compare the two situations, it makes me wonder if one issue with us soccer, when it comes to development, is that it is less passionate, less desperate, less gritty than the ROW. Personally, I've never refer a silent match, but it sounds kinda dull.
Parents that yell don't just drive refs out of the game, they cause players to quit as well. If you're a kid do you want to play when the atmosphere is so negative? When I coached I frequently had players ask if they could play on the coaches side away from the parents. I don't see any negatives with a silent sideline at youth matches, with the possible exception of trying to enforce it.
I don't think silent saturday/summer/september rules have anything to do with referees. It has to do with player development. When I coached, I would do this with my teams. I'd always tell the other team and invite them to join -- some did, some didn't. (I also followed it myself -- I told the players the only coaching I was going to do during the game was, if necessary, to ask them what their position was.) Players talked more to one another and had more fun. And they typically continued to do so the following weeks. I'm a great fan of it.
I did Silent Saturday in a local house league once. Had a U9G game in which a player suggested I wasn't allowed to talk after I said "goal kick" to clarify my restart decision. It was kind of cute.
We do it 1 game day each season in Colorado. It's mostly about player development and I think it's great. I buy a big box of Tootsie Roll Pops for the parents on my team so they have something to put in their mouths to stay quiet. Altho it's mostly about player development, I'm glad that it's also an easier day for the refs.
I hear this ALL THE TIME as a ref. Players are always asking their coaches to stay on coaches side, whining to each other about the parents, or asking to switch positions away from the parents. The only time I have ever wanted to be closer to the parents is when Chad Greenway was watching his daughter play in one of my games.
My brother and I played ODP back in the day and they highly encouraged this rule of competition. I think we both sat once cause of our father and then my dad found his magic to staying quiet: sunflower seeds. I personally believe for referee and player development we should have a silent sideline for all matches from U7/8 to U14. Those are the most critical ages for player development and the most entry level age group for referees.
There's no other way to enforce it. Dad has to explain to Johnny on the car ride home why he was acting like a 2 year old on the sidelines. Also, the sight of their kid sitting the bench because of their actions will most likely stop such behavior in the future.
So want to justify/accept verbal abuse of kids because it'll toughen them up and may eventually make them better players? I honestly don't know what to say to this.
I don't think he is accepting verbal abuse. He is reporting his observations of cultural differences.
Speaking as a parent... I understand the point of "Silent Saturday" and think it can be a good thing. HOWEVER, banning ALL yelling for much longer than a game is too much IMO. Your midfielder makes a good pass and you yell "Nice ball", should the kid sit on the bench? The game has gone to KFTM and a parent yells at the goalie (or kicker) "you've got this!" and the kid should sit? OK, you say "negative yelling won't be tolerated". How do you judge "negative"? Is "you've got to work harder" negative? Is "run!"? "Be stronger!"? What should happen IMO is the coach or team manager self polices their team. Rules on what you can/can't say are set out at the beginning of the season as are punishments. A simple one would be if a parent gets ejected, their child sits for the entire next game. I have been on the sidelines when other parents (of my team) have gone too far IMO. Yes, I should probably speak up. But I've got to be around these parents for the next 'x' years. One time I did tell a parent (from our team) to "drop it" (he was haranguing the team side AR over a missed offside that led to a goal) and was told by another parent to "mind my own business". Just another viewpoint.
The silence rule would have saved you from this confrontation I was more annoyed by the behavior of the other parent's of my son's U11 team many years ago than I ever have been as a ref, including the couple of games where I have ejected spectators. My wife eventually became the enforcer, patrolling the sideline with a bag of lollipops to hand out to the dads that couldn't keep their mouths shut. It was funny to see them start to yell at a ref then look around to see if she was nearby. My daughter was a referee for a couple of seasons. She elected not to re-certify mainly because of parent behavior. To be honest I'm kind of glad she's no longer working games when I'm not also there.
Do you think they are positive? I can't tell you how many times I've seen kids glare at the sideline over "encouragement" like that.
I agree positive cheering and excitement shouldn't be punished. Another poster has mentioned what do you do when you have someone who walks the line... in my opinion on the youth matches I don't think it's a big deal having cheering. If I had it my way parents wouldn't be allowed on the sideline. Or anywhere near the field. They would be forced to wait from outside the field, park, or school. Just drop them off like it was a practice.
It's one of the times in life where person or group X (parents in this case) deserve to be punished, but it's impossible to punish person or group X without punishing person or group Y. Another example would be if misbehavior by some teenagers causes stricter rules at school or a teen curfew that restricts teenagers who haven't done anything wrong. Hypothetically a 1 game suspension could have big consequences. What if the league record is 20 goals in 16 games and Johnny finishes with 19 goals in 15 games (a slightly higher goals per game) with a 1 game suspension because of his dad? If you don't think a 1 game suspension or difference in games played matters, think about the reaction to Roger Maris breaking the season home run record with a season 8 games longer than when Babe Ruth played. What if Johnny's team barely misses the playoffs and lost to a bad team in a game Johnny was suspended for? What if having 1 fewer game to accumulate statistics costs Johnny thousands of dollars of a college scholarship? That isn't likely, but if all school and youth leagues allowed or required suspending kids due to what their parents did, and it was possible to identify the consequences of each suspension, occasionally it would be a big deal.
True, but then *I* couldn't yell. I never said they were positive. I intentionally picked statements that (IMO) aren't positive, but not exactly negative to prove a point. I would have a problem with that. I personally flat out enjoy watching my kids play. Shouldn't actions, if extreme enough, HAVE consequences? Isn't that the entire point? If you are CR, are you going to withhold a red card simply because it's a star player? After all, without that player, maybe the team won't advance?
I sure hope your speaking as parent who has played the game. Pretty much at the top of my annoyance list as a referee trying to be there to help the game help kids is seeing (frequently fatass) American parents sitting on the sidelines screaming at their kids late in the game to run more or work harder. Work ethic is NOT going to be taught during a game and 9 times out of 10 the kids are already beat and tired - but it's easy to sit in your comfy little chair with the umbrella or worse the fully enclosed plastic wind protector and scream at your kids that THEY need to be working more. Don't take this too personally, but the VAST majority of the time, such "encouragement" is NOT helpful and if anything just makes the kids resent you. I hear it all the time and joke "easy for them to say sitting over there eating doritos isn't it...." One thing I really enjoyed as my son worked up to DA level was the decrease in yelling. At the highest level of youth soccer it's generally devoid of any such yelling. In my limited experience the level of "encouragement" from the sidelines is in direct inverse proportion to the knowledge of the parents and skill level of the kids playing.