Best Story of the Week - 2019

Discussion in 'Referee' started by code1390, Jan 1, 2019.

  1. Law5

    Law5 Member+

    Mar 24, 2005
    Beaverton OR
    9.2.1.c The game is restarted with a drop ball: "c. following a temporary suspension of play for an injury or unusual situation and a goalkeeper is not in possession of the ball."

    I like Bubba's answer. And then you call your assignor and request to not work with this guy again. I suspect you will not be the first person to make such a request.

    We had two guys doing a dual on a junior high game get into a pissing contest with each other during the game. The less experienced guy left the field, called the assignor and asked her to overrule the other guy on a goal kick/corner kick decision. (cf. 5.3.1.k) The assignor told him, "I think the best thing to do right now would be for you to get in your car and go home." How can you have someone who just can't play nice with the other referee be a referee for a 12 year olds game? Isn't getting them to get along with each other really the heart of what we do?
     
  2. Bubba Atlanta

    Bubba Atlanta Member+

    Mar 2, 2012
    Yep, Atlanta
    Club:
    Atlanta United FC
    #1052 Bubba Atlanta, Oct 9, 2019 at 4:53 PM
    Last edited: Oct 9, 2019 at 5:00 PM
    This sounds like the kind of thing I would say, and then, increasingly, think "Hmm, maybe I should have said that a different way." For better or worse, we're in a time when words matter even more than they should, and I'm thinking "you don't want to die on this hill" is not the best phrasing of the sentiment, especially in a HS game.

    Probably over-reacting, but over-reaction seems to be the way it goes these days.

    I tend to use a lot of old sayings that I picked up from my parents, who were Depression children, one raised in a shoe store and the other on a farm. A lot of those sayings, when I stop and think of them, tend to be agricultural in their provenance and people today have no idea what they mean. I catch myself saying something – frequently on a crowded elevator – and people looking at me like "Wait, what did he say? And exactly what did he mean by it?"

    Be careful out there.
     
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  3. DefRef

    DefRef Member

    Jul 3, 2017
    Storrs CT
    Well crap, I said I knew the rule, and I was wrong. I did not realize that what I wanted to do - give the drop ball to the keeper, is what I should have done.

    Annnnd, my holier than thou partner is gonna get an earful (well an email full) from me.
     
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  4. MJ91

    MJ91 Member

    Jan 14, 2019
    United States
    Meh... I did a 4.5 yd drop ball near midfield to team last possessing near the end of the second HS game last Tuesday night... That was after doing a weekend of USSF youth matches... Oops. But no one said anything.
     
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  5. gaolin

    gaolin Member

    Apr 21, 2019
    Here's my personal story of the month:

    I've successfully finished U17G AR match without any pain after strengthening my muscles.

    Since September 8, I endured an overuse injury in my right knee and since then have done daily PT and stretching. Today, I had my first intense game back where I was an AR as U17G and felt absolutely no pain after my game whereas 2-3 weeks ago, I had to stop midway on a U19G.

    I am proud in the fact that refereeing is helping me (or rather forcing...) me to learn about my body and how its muscles work. I am keeping fit and it feels fantastic.
     
  6. seattlebeach

    seattlebeach Member

    May 11, 2015
    Not Seattle, Not Beach
    Totally an option. Also the "help me out" variation can work - "hey man, can you help me out, I want to keep this game under control, and I think you challenging here could cause a fight." He thinks he's doing you a favor, you keep things how you want them, your point is made. Either approach can work, it just depends on the situation and your communication style - I like this way because it's more person-to-person than coming across like a lecturing "do the right thing" dad.
     
  7. voiceoflg

    voiceoflg Member

    Dec 8, 2005
    I'm starting to get that way with a fellow official. Like me, he started refereeing as an adult with teenage kids. But he has never been certified USSF. You don't have to be to referee parks and rec in Alabama. I worked a dual U10 game with him and he never moved away from the touchline and never moved farther than ten yards away from the midline on his end of the field. He never crossed the midline. He never called a foul. I finally called a few fouls that were within ten yards of him. After the game, he asked me what I was doing. "You don't call fouls in my area." "Someone had to. You didn't see that trip? Or that push? Or that one grabbing a handful of t-shirt?" "This is ten-year-old rec. These kids don't foul on purpose. Let them play."

    I seriously considered blocking him, but it seems the assignor doesn't have blocking fellow officials turned on in Arbiter.
     
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  8. Ickshter

    Ickshter Member

    Manchester City
    Mar 14, 2014
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Yea, I have had a guy that I have been paired with more times than I have liked this year for HSBV. We had an official go down mid season due to injury so our normal crews have been mixed up a bit and I have found myself as this guys AR a few more times than I can handle. We were talking during one break about the YC restriction for teams playing in HS and I said I wish it was a higher number because 24 YC's seems completely plausible for a team to reach when they play 24 games in a season. That is just one tactical foul YC per game and that team cannot play, dude looks at me and says "What do you mean tactical foul? They are all just fouls." I said what about a guy bringing down an attacker outside the PA on a breakaway to stop a promising attack? He said it was just a foul, that there was nothing in the WIAA rule book that says anything about tactical fouls. I said there may not be, but every official should know and understand that because the players and coaches will be expecting that. But he just walks around the pitch (I have been ahead of him as an AR running up the sideline during a counter attack) and just whistles and points. Nothing more. 2 of the 3 games I have done with him at the center have had higher than needed temperatures. I just try and make my calls and shake hands after the game and leave.
     
  9. Beau Dure

    Beau Dure Member+

    May 31, 2000
    Vienna, VA
    Big tournament weekend coming up. I didn't fill out any of the "availability sheets" because I wasn't sure of my availability but figured I would check back for all the open games my assignors were claiming they had. Sure enough, I had some time free, and I found a good tripleheader of games that wouldn't be too taxing (U12) and would be working with another ref I know and like.

    Then THAT tournament decided not to use ARs for U9 through U12. And in the mad scramble, I wound up with no assignments at all in either tournament.

    Fortunately, my club's rec league has some available games. I really didn't want to miss out this weekend while the weather's ideal.
     
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  10. Ickshter

    Ickshter Member

    Manchester City
    Mar 14, 2014
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Lucky you. We are getting our first snowfall of the year this weekend. Oh, and we have a week of HS soccer left before we start playoffs. <<insert Mora "Playoffs?" sound byte here>>
     
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  11. GearRef

    GearRef Member

    Manchester City
    United States
    Jan 2, 2018
    La Grange Park, Illinois
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    This happened about a week ago. GU18 State Cup game, and I, a 15 year old, have the whistle. I say something to the effect of "let's knock out a pregame really quick", and my AR2, a 50 year old guy, starts saying "OK i'll leave the box to you..." like dude! It's my middle. I know I do abnormally high level matches for my age, but this stuff just makes me mad. I told him earlier that I was going to go introduce myself to the coaches and he tells me not to because the team just started a warm-up. He acts like some ex-national spouting "wisdom and advice", like, we do the same level games in the middle and I'm only a teenager! Where does he get off lecturing me on this stuff? Sorry if it appears like I'm trying to brag because I'm not, I'm honestly just so sick of this.

    Rant over.
     
  12. gaolin

    gaolin Member

    Apr 21, 2019
    Two things they may infer:

    Some people take the pre-game seriously. Especially at the State Cup level. The fact you were so flippant about "knocking it out real quick" made them think you didn't care for preparation.

    Secondly "it's _my_ middle"? I can only guess what vibe you were giving off but from what I infer it was not "we're a team..."

    And of course, different referees have different styles. Some communicate well. Some do not. You will find some that get on your nerves. All part of the game, I guess...
     
  13. fischietto

    fischietto Member

    Apr 13, 2018
    I’m confused how your AR wanting to defer the key match incident of a penalty kick to you is an affront? He’s actually showing you, as the referee, too much deference in this instance. If my AR said that, I’d gently say that I still would appreciate any information he had, and then proceed to lay out some subtle mechanics to use.

    As a young referee, you need to get used to older, more “experienced” referees automatically thinking they need to take you under their wing or give advice. I’ve dealt with it - and it’s annoying. But as professionals we must get on and learn to work with all types. I know it’s easier said than done.
     
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  14. GearRef

    GearRef Member

    Manchester City
    United States
    Jan 2, 2018
    La Grange Park, Illinois
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Considering I have my pregame written out on a full page (minus team-specific stuff), I'd say I take it seriously. I'm pretty certain that I'm thorough in my instructions and to be honest, that's just the way I talk i.e. pretty light, especially when talking with other refs. Just my personality. To your second point, yes I know we are team. That's actually the first thing in my pregame. However, I believe it is the referee's responsibility to lead the pregame and he as an AR should not be telling me how I will referee the match.
     
  15. GearRef

    GearRef Member

    Manchester City
    United States
    Jan 2, 2018
    La Grange Park, Illinois
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    Trust me, being a ref since I was 11 has led to dozens of those encounters. I appreciate the advice on how to respond to people like this.
     
  16. wguynes

    wguynes Member

    Dec 10, 2010
    Altoona, IA
    It's more of the ignorance the the penalty area boundary is some magical line. It implies that, absent this pregame, he was only allowed to help inside the PA and now, given a pregame, he won't help. He's not viewing this as a team... one where the center makes the final call, but one of "all this is mine, all that is yours."
     
  17. DefRef

    DefRef Member

    Jul 3, 2017
    Storrs CT
    I see you have potential to go a long way as a ref. I say this because you have the personality that wants to be in charge. Keep it up.

    Speaking as an oldster, unfortunately, all too often when we work with young refs, we see that they can barely give a crap. They are obviously just out there for the $ and do the bare minimum and really don't care. And we generally try to light a fire under them, usually unsuccessfully. You, on the other hand, are already on fire and good to go. I suspect your old AR partners don't see that very often and assume you need guidance. Hopefully you all get on the same page quickly and ref the heck out of those games.
     
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  18. fischietto

    fischietto Member

    Apr 13, 2018
    Hmm, maybe I’m not understanding the exchange accurately in that case. I imagined that the AR volunteered that as part of the pregame discussion (which I know is not best practice as the referee should be leading the discussion, but I really don’t think it’s cynical or undermines the referee to be perfectly honest).
     
  19. TheRealBilbo

    TheRealBilbo Member+

    Apr 5, 2016
    My thoughts... It was a passive aggressive statement on the older gentleman's part. I would expect the center to want a pre game, and my question would be something to the effect of "what do you expect from me?"

    He starting the pre game by telling you what you should expect from him. You're right to think... 'Oh (something), not this again.' But, that is better left unsaid. The nice thing is you only have this guy in your life for the next 90 or so minutes, and you each have a job to do. Get it done.

    Go through your pre game, tell them your expectations, and move on. Figure out how he can help you, and compensate as needed. You are going to come across people like this throughout your entire professional career, regardless of what it is. You'll need to figure out how to manage working with them.
     
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  20. Sam_C

    Sam_C Member

    Manchester City
    Brazil
    Jun 19, 2018
    You're not alone, and it ain't gonna end any time soon so it may be wise to get used to it. I'm 21 and it still happens (mostly on HS games), I had a prep boys varsity whistle recently, here's how it went down. The day before, I get the first email from AR1 "Hey Sam, please bring flags." Okay, no problem I replied: "Sure thing, I always have em." Few hours later, next email: "Hey Sam, make sure you have yellow and green." Okay, no problem, always have em... I get to the game site on game day and the same older fellow who emailed me is giving a pregame to AR2 outside the car, I introduce myself, and then he goes off on his own to warm up on the grass at the bottom of the hill (turf is at the top). After I checked the field and warmed up, the older fellow comes up from the lower field, and while I'm in the middle of getting all my gear out, he asks to go for a walk with us to pregame. Okay, no problem, I start my pregame, and after a few sentences he stops me and says "Okay, that's good stuff, but here's what I want." I had to go over to my phone and pull up the assignment because he was so sure that he had the whistle, but it seemed to be an honest mistake, no harm done. Who would put the kid in the middle anyway!?!? :eek:
     
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  21. Kit

    Kit Member+

    Aug 30, 1999
    Herkimer, NY, USA
    Club:
    Everton FC
    Nat'l Team:
    United States
    I usually go over subs with my partner during pregame in a dual system. I usually say that the official on the bench side should whistle for the subs. If the official doesn't see the subs, then the far side official can whistle them on. However, the far side official should wait a few seconds to see if the bench side official notices; you shouldn't just automatically whistle for subs. Either referee can call on the subs, but it is common courtesy to give the bench side official a chance first. If the far side official is always blowing the whistle to call on the subs, it doesn't look as professional and looks like the far side official like they are trying to take control of the game.
     
  22. Sam_C

    Sam_C Member

    Manchester City
    Brazil
    Jun 19, 2018
    As a player I have never once noticed who was whistling for the subs, all we noticed was whether or not the sub was allowed when it should've been, or when the referees were in la-la-land and we had to stay out longer than we should've had to. As a referee, I don't care which side whistles; if there is a legal substitution opportunity, you aren't stopping a quick restart, and the players are ready to go, get em in. There are too many unicorns who want to uphold their version of "perfect" procedures on situations that players and coaches simply don't notice, they have better things to worry about and so do we. This reply isn't intended to be personal, you do you, but in my opinion, nobody except referees notices this as a "professional" or "control" seeking action.
     
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  23. MJ91

    MJ91 Member

    Jan 14, 2019
    United States
    This was an issue for me last night... HSBV dual, I'm R1. Ball crew was executing well and Visiting team took very quick throw-in's every single time. I literally had to whistle as soon as ball was out or R2 pointed in their direction to get any of their subs on.

    Late first half fly-by to visiting HC, "Coach, I don't want to stop your quick throw-in's, but at this rate we'll have to wait for goal or corner kicks to get your subs on." "Not a problem, Ref. We're throwing it to them more than us anyway..." :)
     
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  24. BrianD

    BrianD Member

    Manchester United
    United States
    Jun 29, 2018
    I would add one thing to this. Take this time to practice reading people and learning to communicate in a way that brings the most value to the team. Your interactions can turn off the AR and result in him only going through the motions, or get him pumped and ready for a good game. Everybody wants to hear things a little differently, and if you can learn to judge that, you can turn even a bossy AR into a strong advocate.
     
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  25. jayhonk

    jayhonk Member+

    Oct 9, 2007
    The point isn't what the AR is saying about the penalty area. The point is GearRef says, I am about to give you my pregame; then the AR gives his version. What, you are predicting what GearRef is about to say? Let the guy speak.

    Some people just have to jump in with their answers. I had similar recently. When the CR is about to skip a pregame, I often ask a single question as the very short version of what I need to know, "If it comes to it, how do you want me to indicate a PK?" So, the other AR answers, "Well, the standard signal is blah, blah, blah..."! Dude, I am not asking you, I am asking him!

    (I know what the standard signal is, and I know that half of the refs don't know it or don't want it. Furthermore, I am at least as interested in how the CR reacts, as what he says.)

    As others have indicated, this situation becomes one of corralling the wayward personalities, for this game, without getting frustrated. But, I do feel, GearRef's frustration.
     
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