Category Archives: I suppose I have to have a separate Beckham category

29

MLS ready for learner’s permit, not driver’s license

…y’know, I’m starting to lean towards Chicharito ahead of Landon for CONCACAF Player of the Year. Does that make me a bad person? Or does the fact that I’m giving out fake awards make me a bad person? Oh, wait, I know what makes me a bad person. See that …

41

Pen Pals

Dear Mr. Goff, Thank you for your letter, Steve. Can I call you Steve? Let me answer that for you. Damn skippy I can call you Steve. I make Warren Buffett look like Jimmy Buffett – hell, I make him look like Hometown Buffet. I’ll call you Susie if I …

15

No choking in MLS this week

Here in Los Angeles, there’s a minimum level of fame you must have in order to get away with a serious crime. We call it the Phil Spector Scale. It’s sort of like the Mendoza Line, but for murderers. Well, MLS apparently has a similar line, and at least a …

22

Dallas avenges both 1998 and that one guy who held up that sign back in 2007

There should be an opposite of ESPN Classic. Like, ESPN Horsesh*t. Because Saturday’s LA-Dallas game deserves immortality, but calling it a classic would be rank false advertising. I’m sure in the 130 years or so they’ve been playing association football that there have been weirder games. That Caribbean tournament where …

7

Crowning Moment of Awesome

Need to start off with an apology. It turns out my strident recommendation of the Sounders-Reds game turned out about as well as the time I did a Google search for erotica about Snuffy the Pedestrian.* Anyway, let’s talk about a term from TV Tropes called the Crowning Moment of …

22

This Mike Ammann interview is incredible

http://www.metrofanatic.com/story.jsp?ID=5185 and so is this one: http://www.bigapplesoccer.com/teams/…ticle_id=18988 EDIT – wow, Ammann got popular all of a sudden. Also Soccernet. …but wait, he should have kept all that stuff in the locker room! He’s being unprofessional! Tab Ramos should tell a reporter that Ammann needs to learn how to show respect! …

54

Grant Wahl is going to sell an awful lot of books

Welp. In the interests of fairness, the Galaxy weren’t a good team when Beckham found them. But…you know, how does one process this? Plus a lot of Landon Donovan just obliterating Beckman. A couple of weeks ago, that wouldn’t have been quite so bad, but this week, it’s like Neil …

11

Dave Bigalow, European Gigolo

Well, here it is, Tuesday morning. What can I talk about today. There’s the US Open Cup, there was the WPS weekend – but, I want to be sure I don’t miss anything, so I’ll just wander over to MLSnet.com and see what the lead story is OH YOU GOTTA …

26

Don’t you ever again lie to me like I’m Montel Williams!

This is going to be venting about topics that even close, close friends of mine are sick of me talking about. Can’t apologize enough. It’s even worse that this isn’t the last time I’m going to talk about these particular issues, either. And, I’m doing this on a day the …

27

I wanna big up Five Percent Nation

The entire world population can be divided into three groups: The 85%, easily led in the wrong direction, hard to be led in the right direction. The 10%, know who the truth, but teach a lie. The 5%, who teach knowledge, wisdom, and understanding, which are true, undeniable facts and …