Category Archives: Discredited American Soccer Theories
I’m pleased to announce we have a guest for today’s topic. Here to discuss the future of Chivas USA with me is Dr. Hari Seldon, professor of mathematics at the University of Streeling. Professor Seldon, thank you for joining us. HS: Your pleasure. DL: Thank you, I – huh? HS: …
The Greatest MLS Accomplishments of Antonio Cué: 1. Got Doug Hamilton’s car really clean 2. 3. 4. I must be here to bury Antonio Cué, because I’m damn sure not here to praise him. I’ve said this before, but Chivas USA should be studied in business schools around the world. This is …
MLS playoffs – think locally, act moronically
I was on the phone before the ball even hit the net. “Satan? It’s me. Luke Rodgers is going to be the hero? After all I’ve done for you? Tell me what it’ll take to undo this.” “Okay, Loney. Five things. First, who the here told you to call me …
The MVP award is a connected series of statements to establish a definite proposition
EDIT – Yikes on the first version of the title. (For those of you who missed it, I said nice things about Hitler. Whoops! Also my grammar sucked, but it was primarily the Hitler thing.) I should have waited until this week to start complaining about the two-legged first round, …
The biggest flops in American soccer history
Blame Kenn. If it weren’t for him pointing this out on Facebook, I wouldn’t have read this: This is a team not only in danger of missing the playoffs, but one that could become the biggest flop in American professional soccer history. Okay, forget for a moment that this year’s …
Bob Bradley to spend less time with his family
Okay, here’s an in-depth look at the All-Star Game, and what it means in the grand scheme of things for MLS. As I explain in great detail, the product of a significant amount of work and research on my part, the All-Star Game provides Major League Soccer with a oh …
Might as well pile on. Better never than late, after all. Tim Howard clarified his comments, according to Major League Soccer Soccer. Pipe down, Tim. If Guadaloupe had been up there to get their medals, the ceremony would have been in French. If Grenada had been up there, it would …
At least Metro Playoff Fever managed to last two games
Holy CRAP, did Kansas City ever tune up New England in the Open Cup this week. Although I think it’s still not the real Open Cup yet, but play-in games. You know, I kind of had the feeling that we weren’t getting a sense of the real KC so far, …
Landon’s time is a terrible thing to waste
Okay, so what WAS all that with Roma and Donovan about, anyway? So Greg Seltzer at Major League Soccer Soccer interviewed the Thomas DiBenedetto, who is planning to branch out from baseball to harpastum, and he said this: Looking at this quote again reminds me that “obviously” is one of …
Choking pigs disgrace American soccer
Since I’ve been called out by name on this topic, I might as well respond. For those of you just joining us, this is how I saw the CONCACAF Champions tournament: And this week we come to grips with the harsh reality that we won’t be able to live vicariously …
