I'm sure its fantasy but this would be the only possible way it could be attempted. He couldn't run 2 years ago, never mind after 2 years of good eating sitting in a directors box. He will never lose his technique and eye for a pass so you get the team on board that they have to do that extra running for him to make up for him. The camera follows the ball so you never see him work. Watching him live is the only way you can truly appreciate how he always found those 5 yards of space. If you play him up front in a league like the championship he will get the shit kicked out off him inside 15 mins. It would be truly something to witness if this mad rumour happened.
There's a Maccarone on this season of Big Brother, which my lady watches religiously (I don't get it myself... At all...).