[jamison]

Yeah, you heard me.



Nothing like a "jack-knifed Trouser-Trailer" accident to start off a thread.

(only kidding, relax).

This Saturday night the Metrostars host the in-form New England Revolution in a desperate race for the playoffs, with coach Bob Bradley on the hot seat.

The Revs, having secured thier place atop the eastern division, head into the Swamp winners of 4 of their last 5 games. They have pulled clear of the three teams vying for second place and look set to cruise into the playoffs with a realistic shot at thier first MLS title. A win will clinch a playoff spot, a loss will cost Clint Dempsey dinner for 4 at Denny's, Rt. 17, Paramus.

Metro, are clearly another story. While they have taken 8 of the last 12 available points, they have still won just 3 of thier last 11 games and are in a desperate final month where virtually all games are "must wins" if they are to make the playoffs.

New Metro signing Daniel Garipe looks like he'll have to wait another week to make his debut for his new team, due to visa issues. Metro fans will wait with bated breath to see if his play during that debut can shed some light on how he got the nickname "The Ripper." Hopefully, us not for methane production antics on the team bus.

A look at the standings:

Team         gp  w  l  t  pts 
New England  26 15  5  6  51 
D.C. United  27 13  9  5  44 
Kansas City  27 11  7  9  42 
Chicago      26 13 10  3  42 
MetroStars   26  9  7 10  37 
Columbus     25  9 13  3  30

Revolution Game Preview

Despite a 14-point gap between the two clubs, Saturday’s night’s contest is one that New England cannot take lightly. The MetroStars have not lost at home in more than three months, going 5-0-5 in the last 10 matches. The MetroStars also boast a powerful attacking presence and are the only team that has five players with six or more goals scored this season (Amado Guevara (9), Youri Djorkaeff (7), Ante Razov (7), Sergio Galvan Rey (6) and Eddie Gaven (6)).

The Eastern Conference foes have faced off against each other twice this year with the Revolution taking the most points courtesy of last-minute heroics in both games.

(Twellman scored in the 89th minute to give the Revs a 2-2 draw at GS in May, while Metro lost 4-2 on June 25th at the Razor).

In their last game, Metro pulled out a road win in KC thanks to some solid defense and Sasha Victorine, every opponent's best friend. Here was Bradley's Lineup:

MetroStars -- Tony Meola, Tim Regan, Jeff Agoos, Tim Ward, Carlos Mendes, Michael Bradley, Amado Guevara, Mike Magee, Eddie Gaven (Mark Lisi 83), Youri Djorkaeff (Chris Leitch 70), Ante Razov (Abbe Ibrahim 91+).

Tim Regan will miss this game with a Red Card suspension, and Danilo Da Silva remains out.

The Revs beat Columbus 3-1 at home their last time out, and here is Steve Nichols' team:

New England Revolution -- Matt Reis, Jay Heaps, Michael Parkhurst, Marshall Leonard, Steve Ralston (Ricardo Phillips 84), Clint Dempsey (Andy Dorman 72), Daniel Hernandez, Shalrie Joseph, Joe Franchino, Taylor Twellman, Pat Noonan.

The Revs don't list any injuries, though defenseman Marhsall Leonard received a discipline warning for caution points accumulation and a league warning for having two first names.

On a completely unrelated note, it's Ukrainian Heritage Night at Giants Stadium. Anyone know what stop on the Q train Little Odessa is? This will include WBC Heavyweight Champion Vitali Klitschko and Olympic and world champion figure skater Oksana Baiul as featured guests, not to mention two yellow & blue yahoos from Hopatcong and one Polish guy cursing at them in Russian for no apparent reason. Anyone with a "Free Tymoshenko" banner will get in free, anyone with a Karpaty Lviv jersey will have to pay regular price.

It should be a classic game with the Metro looking to score goals and not play defense while the Revs look to give Joey Franchino the chance to break each of the 22 legs he faces on Saturday. He only needs 6 more to take the all-time MLS lead.

Prediction: Metro 2- NE 2, Razov with both Metro goals.

[jamison]

And now, back to Ted Kennedy post game party.

Jogging upfield after a goal kick, Revolution forward Taylor Twellman pauses for a glance at the crowd and a quick game of "I'd do her."



Goalkeeper Matt Ries struggles with the technique of the Revolution's new "Jane Fonda Defense".

[jamison]

On day six of his hunger strike holdout for a new contract, Clint Dempsey finally cracks.


Nothing bothers DC United Goalkeeper Nick Rimando more than Twellman's "Saturday Night Fever" goal celebration.

[jamison]

And finally:


"OH!MY!GOD! IS YOUR BARN DOOR OPEN!"

[st ryma 7]

Originally Posted by jamison

Nothing bothers DC United Goalkeeper Nick Rimando more than Twellman's "Saturday Night Fever" goal celebration.

ok, this is hilarious

[brandnew_de]

I hate it when I give too much rep in 24 hours

[st ryma 7]

Originally Posted by st ryma 7

ok, this is hilarious

rimando is making the pose i make when i let out a hefty yelp after a nice win in flippy cup

[edlova]

hahahahaha



I believe us Riders that are making it down will be parking near lot 12, where I hear you guys park before the games (ESC that is)...see you there, maybe have a beer or two with you guys like when you made it up to Gillette last game.

[j1mbr0wn]

Yes, the drama is so thick, you can cut it with a knife. In addition to the usual (who's hurt, who's carded), the Revs have a few other varibles to consider this week in GS:

Will Pat remember to bring his goal scoring prothesis?

Will the refs let Jay Heaps play with his extra right arm?

And how will Steve Ralston reach the ball if his high chair is in Columbus?

[Jonny Bishop]

I have to hand it to you guys, you have the best photo caption/smack-talking threads on all of BS.