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Just a stranger on the bus
Man, we've been shooting a lot of business Beau's way, but Juan Carlos Osorio packed a lot of Whiskey Tango Foxtrot into just two lines, so I thought I'd vent in public, by your leave.
As a customer of MLS, I'd prefer it if players and officials weren't quite so honest about using the league as a steppingstone (TM Pat Ianni) to better things. Especially when, as with people like Ianni and Osorio, they haven't accomplished anything in the league yet. I gotta think you're better off focusing on the job at hand, because when you all do get to Europe, you'll actually have to perform rather than spend hours on the tribalrivalsrumors.com web site or whatever looking for potential job openings.
Kinnear and Landon and yes, Taylor Twellman have earned the right to speculate in public about Europe (Kinnear hasn't, to my knowledge, I'm just picking a guy who has enough jewelry now to justify it if he wanted to). Until Osorio wins something, he's running his yap.
That's not what annoyed me, though.
Oh, shut up. Shut up, Coach. Just shut up, and after you've finished shutting up, shut up some more.
You could say this isn't really about soccer, but about religious belief, so I'm out of my jurisdiction here. But no. The topic is Juan Carlos Osorio's long-term plans to replace Sven-Goin' Elsewhere as boss of the most popular team in Manchester. God doesn't care. Jesus doesn't care. Buddha, Allah, Dagda - wrong number. This is not an issue for the divine.
Now, JCO wants to talk about God making him into a better, more ethical, more complete, more fulfilled person - great. That would be a reasonably controversial topic in some quarters, but it's something important to him, and it provides an insight into what makes the guy tick.
But this is Osorio portraying Marc de Grandpre and/or John Guppy as Instruments of the Lord, and I don't know anyone, religious or otherwise, who is better for hearing that. Including, undoubtedly, Guppy and de Grandpre.
The theological implications of Osorio dumping the Fire for New York, and trying to bring Wilman Conde with him are admittedly hilarious. Nevertheless, I'd prefer to hear Osorio admit that sometimes, it's just about human free will, and God is more interested in a person's soul than their job description or their earthly success. (Or lack thereof, to be blunt and cruel. If I could figure out that Calen Carr was a better option than Paulo Wanchope last year, you think the Creator of the Universe could have done the same. Just sayin'.)
I realize Osorio didn't invent this sort of thing. It goes way back before Kurt Warner and Tony Dungy tried to convince us God had a rooting interest in the Super Bowl. It's not even confined to sports, unless you believe God really did think it was for the highest and greatest good that freaking Mary J. Blige won a freaking Grammy. But there must be ways for people in the public eye to express their religious and spiritual beliefs without looking like jackholes.
I know, it could be worse. At least Osorio's not a god-damned Scientologist.
UPDATE - commenters have pointed out that I misinterpreted Osorio's intent about where God was leading him. He may have always intended to end up as New York's head coach, and thus, there's no worry that he intends to go back to Manchester. (That's what happens when you jump from contract to contract - people like me doubt your good intentions.) I apologize.
That said, a God whose ultimate plan for you includes coaching the New York Red Bulls is a terrible and brutal god, indeed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by my new least favorite coach in MLS
When Juan Carlos Osorio left as MetroStars assistant coach in 2001 for a job with England's Manchester City, he knew he'd be back.
"I always said … that I will go to England and learn as much as I could and take my (coaching) licenses and one day I would be back as a head coach," Osorio says.
"I always said … that I will go to England and learn as much as I could and take my (coaching) licenses and one day I would be back as a head coach," Osorio says.
Kinnear and Landon and yes, Taylor Twellman have earned the right to speculate in public about Europe (Kinnear hasn't, to my knowledge, I'm just picking a guy who has enough jewelry now to justify it if he wanted to). Until Osorio wins something, he's running his yap.
That's not what annoyed me, though.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JCO
"God himself has given me the chance to come here and work."
You could say this isn't really about soccer, but about religious belief, so I'm out of my jurisdiction here. But no. The topic is Juan Carlos Osorio's long-term plans to replace Sven-Goin' Elsewhere as boss of the most popular team in Manchester. God doesn't care. Jesus doesn't care. Buddha, Allah, Dagda - wrong number. This is not an issue for the divine.
Now, JCO wants to talk about God making him into a better, more ethical, more complete, more fulfilled person - great. That would be a reasonably controversial topic in some quarters, but it's something important to him, and it provides an insight into what makes the guy tick.
But this is Osorio portraying Marc de Grandpre and/or John Guppy as Instruments of the Lord, and I don't know anyone, religious or otherwise, who is better for hearing that. Including, undoubtedly, Guppy and de Grandpre.
The theological implications of Osorio dumping the Fire for New York, and trying to bring Wilman Conde with him are admittedly hilarious. Nevertheless, I'd prefer to hear Osorio admit that sometimes, it's just about human free will, and God is more interested in a person's soul than their job description or their earthly success. (Or lack thereof, to be blunt and cruel. If I could figure out that Calen Carr was a better option than Paulo Wanchope last year, you think the Creator of the Universe could have done the same. Just sayin'.)
I realize Osorio didn't invent this sort of thing. It goes way back before Kurt Warner and Tony Dungy tried to convince us God had a rooting interest in the Super Bowl. It's not even confined to sports, unless you believe God really did think it was for the highest and greatest good that freaking Mary J. Blige won a freaking Grammy. But there must be ways for people in the public eye to express their religious and spiritual beliefs without looking like jackholes.
I know, it could be worse. At least Osorio's not a god-damned Scientologist.
UPDATE - commenters have pointed out that I misinterpreted Osorio's intent about where God was leading him. He may have always intended to end up as New York's head coach, and thus, there's no worry that he intends to go back to Manchester. (That's what happens when you jump from contract to contract - people like me doubt your good intentions.) I apologize.
That said, a God whose ultimate plan for you includes coaching the New York Red Bulls is a terrible and brutal god, indeed.
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Comments
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*claps* *keeps clapping* *stands up and claps* I know I'm supposed to have an actual comment, but I don't.Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 02:17 PM by Sandtiger 
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Um. Isn't he actually saying that he used the Man City job as a stepping stone to his MLS head coaching gig? Think you've got it a bit backwards.
But yeah, religion in the service of sports is just inherently goofy.Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 02:23 PM by luftmensch 
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Isn't he saying that he used England as a stepping stone to get a job in MLS?
Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 02:24 PM by ThreeApples
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Religion is a heated issue, but I'd like to give a few comments that hopefully don't sound too "narrow minded". Some people think (and probably I do as well) that God does give you certain opportunities and that those opportunities are what helps to shape your character/soul/being. And personally, I don't think that it's out of line to thank God for winning something like a super bowl, but it's also a good thing to thank God if you didn't win the super bowl (but you don't often hear that sort of response).
Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 02:32 PM by rockdiesel
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"And verily the Lord spake to him, and his words were terrible: "Thou shalt coach New York Red Bulls" sayeth the Lord, and behold his mind was sore vexed and in his despair he threw himself off a mighty rock...."
Loney 12:32-34Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 02:48 PM by Bill Archer
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" Um. Isn't he actually saying that he used the Man City job as a stepping stone to his MLS head coaching gig? Think you've got it a bit backwards."
So has JCO. Next stop: AYSO?Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 03:03 PM by IHateDC
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There's no doubt God booted him from Chicago for have a blind spot with Wanchope. God loves Chicago.
Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 03:42 PM by monop_poly
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If God wants Osorio to be the 11th NY head coach his iniotials must not be JCO, they must be JOB. That position will do nothing for him but test his faith.
Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 03:48 PM by HerthaBerwyn
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God may love Chicago, but he's not much of a Cubs fan is he?
I don't blame JCO for being ambitious. He said he wanted to coach at the highest levels the first time he met with Fire STHs. However, I never did buy that "leaving for personal family reasons" argument, then again, if God started talking to my wife in the middle of the night...Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 03:52 PM by Pablo Chicago
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This seems like the most oversensitive thing I've ever read from you. It had nothing funny in it either. However, I do applaud you for writing so much based on such otherwise meaningless comments.
Posted 11 Apr 2008 at 05:16 PM by evangel
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God hates Juan Carlos Osorio - Team News - The Offside - Chicago Fire MLS Soccer Blog11 Apr 2008, 07:07 PM
leaving me with the simple task of providing a link. I give you … Dan Loney:
Incredible news: God hates Juan Carlos Osorio.
You’re welcome.
Category: Team News
Tags: Team News, Tag Index
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