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Dia de los Muertes, indeed
Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 02:07 AM by Dan Loney
First of all, wow, what a peach of a game in Seattle tonight. The classic exciting 0-0 game. No, it wasn't a work of art, and yes, Houston fouled up and down the field. I fully expect Sounders fans to turn Rave Green into Rage Green, and I don't blame them one bit. Still, it was pretty exciting.
Fine, the LA-Chivas USA matchup. You've probably figured this out, but there's no way in God's green hell I can be objective about this match. I'm the only soccer fan in Los Angeles that just DOESN'T WANT TO DEAL with it.
Basically, there's no way I can handle it if we* lose. The upside of winning is relief - thank God the Enemy doesn't have that to hang over our heads until the end of time.** The downside...well, it's too horrible to contemplate. And I managed to deal with losing to the Quakes in 2001 and Iran in 1998. I hate this series so much, and we're days away from kickoff. It's almost enough to get me to care about the Phillies or something.
For the civilized world, at least, this matchup is at least two years too late. In fact, given the length of time that has passed since the hype surrounding all involved has sputtered to a halt, Galaxy-Chivas USA is unquestionably the Chinese Democracy of the MLS playoffs.
Case in point - I keep waiting for the Galaxy to change their minds on this, but as of right now their playoff game attendance will be capped at 12,000. That's less than half of the HDC capacity. Theoretically it's to create more atmosphere for the home team, which is hilarious coming from a franchise that is positively Revolutionesque in its choice of money over fan atmosphere. Besides, 12,000? They've sold more tickets for the Freeway Series. This would be the final nail in the Beckham Experiment coffin, except by now there's more nail than coffin.
Meanwhile, Chivas USA continues to chart bold new frontiers of irrelevance. The smartest thing they could do, publicity-wise, is get Marsch to start another fight with Beckham, only this time with a knife. Boy, thank God Shawn Hunter was here to make everything better, huh? If MLS didn't think they could squeeze forty million donuts out of Cooper or Saputo, they'd have dispersal drafted Chivas USA long ago.
Ideally, this would be a Loser Leaves Town match. If the Galaxy wins, Chivas moves. If CUSA wins, Beckham never returns. I could handle that.
Hell, you know what, I'm willing to risk Landon leaving for good, too. I was at peace with him going to Germany at the beginning of the year, and all he's done since then is put up MVP numbers for club and country in one of the best single year performances in the history of American soccer. OKAY, Landon, you made your point already! You can go to PSG or wherever.
The other reason to dread this matchup is, well, this season has really been a PooperScooperClasico. Thank you, yes, I did work very hard on that parody name. Two games, one goal - on a scuffed deflection by some part-time scrub.
It's really tough to pick Chivas USA in this series, mainly because they're going to be so brutally outcoached. Preki likes a nice, physical ruck - but not as much as Bruce Arena's hive of scum and villainy. And, once again, Chivas USA bounces into the playoffs with a passel of skill players under Questionable, Doubtful and Out. That's not even counting guys like Marsch, Suarez and Galindo, who are either old, fragile, or both.
But people have been overrating the Galaxy all year, almost as badly as they've been overrating Chivas USA. Both these teams were easy picks for first round elimination, which is another reason it's annoying that they're matched together. Buddle and Magee have no chemistry, which is fine because neither has been terribly good on their own this year. This is the first year that Donovan hasn't scored on Chivas USA at all, let alone multiple times. Chivas USA knows they can beat Berhalter at some point, as well. And David Beckham has been trying to be thrown out of games for weeks now, though it's doubtful MLS refs will dream of obliging him at this point.
I think this is 210 minutes of torture followed by penalties, and even then I can't pick a favorite. Thornton and Ricketts are a wash, and while Landon is usually automatic, one of his few misses came in a post-game PK shootout. And Beckham stinks at penalties.
Or maybe Landon manages to beat the four or five defenders that CUSA will have on him at all times. Or maybe Kljestan breaks the Madden Curse,*** and Chivas does a Number Six on the Galaxy.****
I have absolutely no idea, and I can't wait until it's over. Either I can exhale, or I can start my therapy. But the suspense is killing me. If only the league would listen to Sacha Kljestan, neither one of us would have to put up with this nonsense.
*I think it's time to accept that fans are going to call their teams by the collective personal pronouns, snooty sports Puritans notwithstanding.
**Or until they finally shut Chivas USA down, which is a subject I'm sure I'll address at some point.
***What? It's all one big happy EA family. Madden can share a curse with FIFA.
****Blazing Saddles reference.
Fine, the LA-Chivas USA matchup. You've probably figured this out, but there's no way in God's green hell I can be objective about this match. I'm the only soccer fan in Los Angeles that just DOESN'T WANT TO DEAL with it.
Basically, there's no way I can handle it if we* lose. The upside of winning is relief - thank God the Enemy doesn't have that to hang over our heads until the end of time.** The downside...well, it's too horrible to contemplate. And I managed to deal with losing to the Quakes in 2001 and Iran in 1998. I hate this series so much, and we're days away from kickoff. It's almost enough to get me to care about the Phillies or something.
For the civilized world, at least, this matchup is at least two years too late. In fact, given the length of time that has passed since the hype surrounding all involved has sputtered to a halt, Galaxy-Chivas USA is unquestionably the Chinese Democracy of the MLS playoffs.
Case in point - I keep waiting for the Galaxy to change their minds on this, but as of right now their playoff game attendance will be capped at 12,000. That's less than half of the HDC capacity. Theoretically it's to create more atmosphere for the home team, which is hilarious coming from a franchise that is positively Revolutionesque in its choice of money over fan atmosphere. Besides, 12,000? They've sold more tickets for the Freeway Series. This would be the final nail in the Beckham Experiment coffin, except by now there's more nail than coffin.
Meanwhile, Chivas USA continues to chart bold new frontiers of irrelevance. The smartest thing they could do, publicity-wise, is get Marsch to start another fight with Beckham, only this time with a knife. Boy, thank God Shawn Hunter was here to make everything better, huh? If MLS didn't think they could squeeze forty million donuts out of Cooper or Saputo, they'd have dispersal drafted Chivas USA long ago.
Ideally, this would be a Loser Leaves Town match. If the Galaxy wins, Chivas moves. If CUSA wins, Beckham never returns. I could handle that.
Hell, you know what, I'm willing to risk Landon leaving for good, too. I was at peace with him going to Germany at the beginning of the year, and all he's done since then is put up MVP numbers for club and country in one of the best single year performances in the history of American soccer. OKAY, Landon, you made your point already! You can go to PSG or wherever.
The other reason to dread this matchup is, well, this season has really been a PooperScooperClasico. Thank you, yes, I did work very hard on that parody name. Two games, one goal - on a scuffed deflection by some part-time scrub.
It's really tough to pick Chivas USA in this series, mainly because they're going to be so brutally outcoached. Preki likes a nice, physical ruck - but not as much as Bruce Arena's hive of scum and villainy. And, once again, Chivas USA bounces into the playoffs with a passel of skill players under Questionable, Doubtful and Out. That's not even counting guys like Marsch, Suarez and Galindo, who are either old, fragile, or both.
But people have been overrating the Galaxy all year, almost as badly as they've been overrating Chivas USA. Both these teams were easy picks for first round elimination, which is another reason it's annoying that they're matched together. Buddle and Magee have no chemistry, which is fine because neither has been terribly good on their own this year. This is the first year that Donovan hasn't scored on Chivas USA at all, let alone multiple times. Chivas USA knows they can beat Berhalter at some point, as well. And David Beckham has been trying to be thrown out of games for weeks now, though it's doubtful MLS refs will dream of obliging him at this point.
I think this is 210 minutes of torture followed by penalties, and even then I can't pick a favorite. Thornton and Ricketts are a wash, and while Landon is usually automatic, one of his few misses came in a post-game PK shootout. And Beckham stinks at penalties.
Or maybe Landon manages to beat the four or five defenders that CUSA will have on him at all times. Or maybe Kljestan breaks the Madden Curse,*** and Chivas does a Number Six on the Galaxy.****
I have absolutely no idea, and I can't wait until it's over. Either I can exhale, or I can start my therapy. But the suspense is killing me. If only the league would listen to Sacha Kljestan, neither one of us would have to put up with this nonsense.
*I think it's time to accept that fans are going to call their teams by the collective personal pronouns, snooty sports Puritans notwithstanding.
**Or until they finally shut Chivas USA down, which is a subject I'm sure I'll address at some point.
***What? It's all one big happy EA family. Madden can share a curse with FIFA.
****Blazing Saddles reference.
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Comments
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how do they let you write on this?Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 04:02 AM by soccermusician 
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Dan, I'm afraid to ask: what will you do to the ChivaGirls at the Number Six dance that night?Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 04:05 AM by Asprilla9
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You can't be serious about the Galaxy capping playoff attendance. Really? In the history of the Home Depot Center there's only been 2 Galaxy games with 12,000 in attendance, the Superliga final and the 2nd ever league match in 2003 scheduled the Tuesday after the inaugural game.
Speaking of Beckham, I'm pretty sure it was the home game against the Sounders that brought up his rebellious schtick. As he trudged towards the tunnel with the always knowledgeable Galaxy crowd giving him a standing ovation for costing his team the game with that stupid tackle on Vagenas, he looked completely disgusted, wondering why he wasn't getting booed off the field, and I believe that moment was when he truly realized his actions don't carry consequences.Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 05:15 AM by Mike Gray
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why the hell would they cap it at 12,000? can't they sell any more tickets than that? for both teams? that's ridiculous. Seattle just sold 36,000 in a city what, 5 times smaller than LA? pathetic!Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 06:17 AM by evan eleven
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uh guys. Uhm, nevermind.
Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 09:28 AM by AndyMead
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Isn't there some weird rule regarding the stadium and Cal State Dominguez Hills, where the stadium is located, and attendance limits for some games? I think this has come up before.Quote:Originally Posted by evan eleven
why the hell would they cap it at 12,000? can't they sell any more tickets than that? for both teams? that's ridiculous. Seattle just sold 36,000 in a city what, 5 times smaller than LA? pathetic!Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 09:34 AM by NeilB
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So? What are CSDH going to do if the Galaxy break that rule? Put them on double-secret probation? Part of being a world-class organization is not giving a shit about rules like that.Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 10:29 AM by FijiUnited
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Boy, no kidding - I suck. I completely left off a regular season game - another 1-0 game, with Alecko scoring probably his last big-time goal of his career. Another lousy game, but one I should have, you know, remembered. That's how crazy this series is making me.Quote:Originally Posted by soccermusician
how do they let you write on this?
Just to remove any hint of doubt, Eskandarian was not the player I meant when I referenced a Galaxy part-time scrub.Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 11:08 AM by Dan Loney
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Dia de los Muertos is Monday.
Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 11:09 AM by SBSpartan
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Capping at 12,000? What a joke.
I know what you mean Dan. You are suffering through what I was afraid would happen in Frisco made the playoffs and Dynamo had to face that team in the first round.
And while it's possible Galaxy have been overrated, it's definitely true that las chivitas are a bunch of pretenders. Galaxy will sail through that team.
And those Seattlebots get what's coming to them, after a whole year of listening to them go on and on about how they're Cthulhu's gift to MLS. I like that team (except for Fredy the Flopper), but delivering some sadness to those fans might just finally give them some humility. (As if I should talk here in Houston, where we got gifted one of the elite teams in MLS in 2006. What do we know of suffering?)Posted 30 Oct 2009 at 11:11 AM by Martek
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