Join Now ANTI-DEVILISHMENT AND PRO-RIGHTEOUSNESS
One thing the auditor must not do is interrupt the person while in the middle of this major win or during the laughter. Otherwise it will invalidate the win.
One thing the auditor must not do is interrupt the person while in the middle of this major win or during the laughter. Otherwise it will invalidate the win.
In my entire 38 years, I've never, ever seen anything so sadistic, vile, immoral and mean-spirited.
MLS All-Star Fever!
Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 03:33 PM by Dan Loney
Does anyone have it?
Okay, Steve Pastorino. Anyone else?
Used to be I would at least turn and look at the thing. It was cute, once. Just a bunch of our favorite players goofing off on a sunny afternoon.
Then...geez, I dunno, it got all dark and pretentious on us. It probably turned for good in 1998, when the Powers That Were tried to use a US Verus The World match as diluted Listerine to wash out the shark sandwich that was the 3-6-1 World Cup a few weeks earlier. The US ran up the score 6-1, and I felt about as proud to be an American as Aldrich Ames.
Then one dark and stormy night in 2002, the US National Team and a bunch of snorgs bitter about not being on the US National Team clashed in a monstrous duel...once the rain delay and the half-time show allowed them to.
Once Carlos Ruiz upheld the honor of American soccer against Chivas in 2003, it was all over. Except for Freddy Adu Commissioner Pick Day in 2004, MLS has ambushed some upper middle class European team in preseason and declared itself champions of the world. If all that has been helping attendance and ratings, God help us if we ever lose one of these things.
Meanwhile, American soil is currently being infested with Barcelona, their close friends from Madrid, and two teams from Milan. Even Club America swings a heavier pocketbook than Everton. But Everton is a Perfectly Respectable Club, and that sort of club is good enough to fill the soccer specific stadiums we have these days without demanding the kind of fees that would hurt profitability. Why spend the money for a truly great and/or popular team, when TV ratings have shown that one preseason scrimmage is pretty much like another? Bringing in those kinds of teams wouldn't do anything about the staleness of the format - Chivas, Chelsea and Celtic proved that already.
They haven't tried South American teams nearly as much as they could, but MLS seems to see the All-Star Game as outreach for Anglophone Europhiles and suburbanites. If Bolivia can corral a Boca-River game, there's no reason MLS can't bring up one of those teams. Or one of the Brazilian club powers. It won't get a lot of mainstream attention, but guess what. Everton won't, either.
Yet, down the road, that will get tired, too. There are really only a few Mexican and South American teams that would get any sort of attention. Even Estudiantes wouldn't move the needle too much, except for the look on Dema Kovalenko's face as he sees the club that should have been his rightful home all along.
Bringing in national teams would be a nice switch, but the US, for one, was awfully busy this summer. (Besides, they'd probably be booed off the field after Sunday's performance.) Assembling national teams for games that won't even count for caps would be a financial and logistical nightmare. For one thing, I'm not sure we'd let Argentina's coach into the country.
So I've finally come around to agreeing with the pick-up game idea. Fans don't vote for starters - they vote for a player pool. Two top vote-getters are the opposing captains. Or maybe the fans only vote for those two players, and then those two players pick the rest of the squad? ESPN2 could broadcast it live.
"Who coaches?" Wait, we're worried about coaching in an All-Star Game? Let a couple of fans coach. Have a contest or something.
"How would you design uniforms? What would you name the teams?" Um, I dunno. Prima-Donovans against the Guillermo Barros Stilettos. Let them wear their club gear. Or shirts and skins. Why is that an issue?
"So no merchandising?" Well...no, you could still buy their club shirts...with an All-Star patch on them. Or something....
"What if one of the pickup captains gets injured? Would the replacement player pick an all-new team?"
....look, SCREW YOU, all right? YOU save the All-Star Game, you're so smart.
Tonight's game? Everton, 5-0.
Okay, Steve Pastorino. Anyone else?
Used to be I would at least turn and look at the thing. It was cute, once. Just a bunch of our favorite players goofing off on a sunny afternoon.
Then...geez, I dunno, it got all dark and pretentious on us. It probably turned for good in 1998, when the Powers That Were tried to use a US Verus The World match as diluted Listerine to wash out the shark sandwich that was the 3-6-1 World Cup a few weeks earlier. The US ran up the score 6-1, and I felt about as proud to be an American as Aldrich Ames.
Then one dark and stormy night in 2002, the US National Team and a bunch of snorgs bitter about not being on the US National Team clashed in a monstrous duel...once the rain delay and the half-time show allowed them to.
Once Carlos Ruiz upheld the honor of American soccer against Chivas in 2003, it was all over. Except for Freddy Adu Commissioner Pick Day in 2004, MLS has ambushed some upper middle class European team in preseason and declared itself champions of the world. If all that has been helping attendance and ratings, God help us if we ever lose one of these things.
Meanwhile, American soil is currently being infested with Barcelona, their close friends from Madrid, and two teams from Milan. Even Club America swings a heavier pocketbook than Everton. But Everton is a Perfectly Respectable Club, and that sort of club is good enough to fill the soccer specific stadiums we have these days without demanding the kind of fees that would hurt profitability. Why spend the money for a truly great and/or popular team, when TV ratings have shown that one preseason scrimmage is pretty much like another? Bringing in those kinds of teams wouldn't do anything about the staleness of the format - Chivas, Chelsea and Celtic proved that already.
They haven't tried South American teams nearly as much as they could, but MLS seems to see the All-Star Game as outreach for Anglophone Europhiles and suburbanites. If Bolivia can corral a Boca-River game, there's no reason MLS can't bring up one of those teams. Or one of the Brazilian club powers. It won't get a lot of mainstream attention, but guess what. Everton won't, either.
Yet, down the road, that will get tired, too. There are really only a few Mexican and South American teams that would get any sort of attention. Even Estudiantes wouldn't move the needle too much, except for the look on Dema Kovalenko's face as he sees the club that should have been his rightful home all along.
Bringing in national teams would be a nice switch, but the US, for one, was awfully busy this summer. (Besides, they'd probably be booed off the field after Sunday's performance.) Assembling national teams for games that won't even count for caps would be a financial and logistical nightmare. For one thing, I'm not sure we'd let Argentina's coach into the country.
So I've finally come around to agreeing with the pick-up game idea. Fans don't vote for starters - they vote for a player pool. Two top vote-getters are the opposing captains. Or maybe the fans only vote for those two players, and then those two players pick the rest of the squad? ESPN2 could broadcast it live.
"Who coaches?" Wait, we're worried about coaching in an All-Star Game? Let a couple of fans coach. Have a contest or something.
"How would you design uniforms? What would you name the teams?" Um, I dunno. Prima-Donovans against the Guillermo Barros Stilettos. Let them wear their club gear. Or shirts and skins. Why is that an issue?
"So no merchandising?" Well...no, you could still buy their club shirts...with an All-Star patch on them. Or something....
"What if one of the pickup captains gets injured? Would the replacement player pick an all-new team?"
....look, SCREW YOU, all right? YOU save the All-Star Game, you're so smart.
Tonight's game? Everton, 5-0.
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Total Comments 21
Comments
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Jeff Bradley wants his idea back.
Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 03:43 PM by monster 
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Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called, they're running out of you.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 03:53 PM by Asprilla9
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haha +1Quote:Originally Posted by Asprilla9
Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called, they're running out of you.
seriously though, i don't know why a lot of people hate the all-star game. it's a great way for the league to try and appeal itself to more fans by showing off some of the better players against european competition.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 04:25 PM by eightyhoursaway
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The whole reason I hate ASG's in other sports is that they are pointless pickup games. You see 2002 as a turn for the worse, I see it as a born again moment.
As long as I hear Eurosnobs snipe on the quailty of MLS play (funny how they never make the seniors tours of Norway, Poland and Switzerland into punchlines, though), I'm going to look at the All Star Game as our only possible chance to compare the talents of our respective leagues.
At this point, the MLS-bashers are down to pleading "meaningless preseason game" as their only defense, which is as convenient as they come. I'm curious as to when they've scheduled league or cup matches with out teams.
When I hear yet another US soccer fan say "I love the game, but I'll never go to an MLS match," all I hear is "It's fine with me if we go back to the 80's, when we never made the World Cup, when you couldn't find a game anywhere, we were TOTALLY ignored by the media, and we had no league or pro development system. And, I just slept with your sister."
Remind me again: Why did I become a soccer fan in this country? Cubs fans don't have it this bad.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 04:59 PM by Brother Badgerjohn
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I like the playground idea. Let the MLS Coach of the Year and the US National Team coach pick sides. Start the weekend after First Kick and have each coach pick a player each week (one could pick Friday and one on Saturday). By July you'd have a 20-man roster on each side and it'd give us something to argue about all season.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 05:36 PM by chapka
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It's close... When was the last time Mark Cuban crashed a supporters section? ;/Quote:Originally Posted by Brother Badgerjohn
Cubs fans don't have it this bad.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 06:06 PM by Jough
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I detest these people, much more than i detest your average run of the mill soccer basher, at least they don't discriminate.Quote:Originally Posted by Brother Badgerjohn
At this point, the MLS-bashers are down to pleading "meaningless preseason game" as their only defense, which is as convenient as they come. I'm curious as to when they've scheduled league or cup matches with out teams.
When I hear yet another US soccer fan say "I love the game, but I'll never go to an MLS match," all I hear is "It's fine with me if we go back to the 80's, when we never made the World Cup, when you couldn't find a game anywhere, we were TOTALLY ignored by the media, and we had no league or pro development system. And, I just slept with your sister."
Oh and i love the current ASG format, i look forward to it more and more each year, also having it on a weeknight instead of a weekend afternoon is a plus i think.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 06:11 PM by CLEATS
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didnt Mexico FMF allstars already beat this team?
Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 07:34 PM by Perndog2006
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I think the ASG format is one of the handful of things that MLS has gotten right. Sure, I would like more a of marquee team than Everton...but it DOES represent a chance for USMNT fans to see how Timmy Howard earns a living.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 07:52 PM by CCinGermany
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Quote:Originally Posted by Perndog2006
didnt Mexico FMF allstars already beat this team?
No not this team. So Vela and Dos Santos play in the FMF? Which teams? I am dying to know.Posted 29 Jul 2009 at 08:04 PM by El Chuma
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