When Hell Unfreezes
07 Feb 2008, 05:25 PM
Sorry this is a bit of a saga, but I need to get it off my chest.............
My ticket was £30..........
This game had disaster written all over it for me :(
First I got very p!ssed at the weekend and put my ticket somewhere safe, where I would easily find it!
Secondly, when I sobered up I couldn't find it.
Eventually, having turned everywhere upside down, I decided, fcuk it, it was only 30 quid anyway.....
Then I found it - so I decided to go, for a number of amoeba brained reasons, none of which (sadly) were mutually exclusive:
1. I had a ticket.
2. The dawn of a new era for English football.
3. I would pay my respects to the lives lost in the Munich air crash!
4. I had Thursday and Friday booked off, so I could have a good drink.
5. I'd had a sh!t day at work and needed a pick-me-up.
6. I had all the time in the world to get there, as I was going to have a drink in the ground for a change, instead of going to a pub!
7. I could go and have a drink and something to eat with my mates, who were planning an assault on Covent Garden, after the game.
So, I left work on a high, having told an agency HR consultant that the only way I could satisfy her, was to sit her on a cactus, she took it well, as you do..............
I got a train from an Essex suburb at 5.15, changed at West Ham onto the Jubilee line - I knew the route well as I went to college in the N West End and travelled to Baker Street 3/4 times a week for 2 years.
The PA system at West Ham said that, 'service was good' - but was it, fcuk...............
I let the first train go, as it was stopping a few stations short of Wembley Park, it was only 2 minutes to the next train.
It was completely empty when it arrived from Stratford.
About a dozen of us got on including 4 girls, all wearing their England gear - I only noticed because one had a really fit arse.
Took us 5 minutes to get to Canning Town.
The driver told us that there was a train stuck at Canary Wharf, so we were held in a queue.
Took us 5 minutes more to get to North Greenwich.
Same to Canary Wharf - I started extrapolating - 5 minutes per station, only 22 in total - I'd be there by 7.30 latest.............wrong.........
At Canary Wharf, every fcuker and their brother and sister got on, the train was mobbed!
The theory now was - we were past the stuck train - plain sailing.......yes?
Noooooooooo............................
We moved off into the tunnel and went about a mile when we stopped again - we sat for 15 minutes going nowhere, then all the lights went off and the emergency lights came on - we could hear an alarm going off -
The driver told us there was a technical problem in the first carriage and engineers were trying to fix it - then the entire world went black - the emergency lights and air con, plus all the lights in the tunnel went off - you could hear a pin drop.........
15 minutes later the lights came back on and the driver said we would shortly, be limping into Canada Water, the problem was intermittent power failure - the real problem was one lying cvnt.................
Then all the lights went off again......
We eventually reached Canada Water at 7.00pm, where they advised us to leave the train and told us to p!ss-off and get a bus, at last some honesty!
Trouble was, there were 500 people queuing to get on the bus going in the right direction - it was at this stage, I decide to go home.
There were only 300 queuing to go the other way, which was to head to the deep south, to Lewisham, where you could pick up the Docklands Light Railway, back from where you came, to the Bank.
So I went for it, walked through to Monument, where I met the fit arse again, then to Tower Hill, round to Fenchurch Street and back to the suburbs - I arrived back at where I started after three and a half hours, travelling in a complete circle to nowhere!
When I got to my local pub, it was half-time.
In conclusion, I only have one thing to say, God help us all, if we win the Olympic bid........
Wot???????????????????????????
My ticket was £30..........
This game had disaster written all over it for me :(
First I got very p!ssed at the weekend and put my ticket somewhere safe, where I would easily find it!
Secondly, when I sobered up I couldn't find it.
Eventually, having turned everywhere upside down, I decided, fcuk it, it was only 30 quid anyway.....
Then I found it - so I decided to go, for a number of amoeba brained reasons, none of which (sadly) were mutually exclusive:
1. I had a ticket.
2. The dawn of a new era for English football.
3. I would pay my respects to the lives lost in the Munich air crash!
4. I had Thursday and Friday booked off, so I could have a good drink.
5. I'd had a sh!t day at work and needed a pick-me-up.
6. I had all the time in the world to get there, as I was going to have a drink in the ground for a change, instead of going to a pub!
7. I could go and have a drink and something to eat with my mates, who were planning an assault on Covent Garden, after the game.
So, I left work on a high, having told an agency HR consultant that the only way I could satisfy her, was to sit her on a cactus, she took it well, as you do..............
I got a train from an Essex suburb at 5.15, changed at West Ham onto the Jubilee line - I knew the route well as I went to college in the N West End and travelled to Baker Street 3/4 times a week for 2 years.
The PA system at West Ham said that, 'service was good' - but was it, fcuk...............
I let the first train go, as it was stopping a few stations short of Wembley Park, it was only 2 minutes to the next train.
It was completely empty when it arrived from Stratford.
About a dozen of us got on including 4 girls, all wearing their England gear - I only noticed because one had a really fit arse.
Took us 5 minutes to get to Canning Town.
The driver told us that there was a train stuck at Canary Wharf, so we were held in a queue.
Took us 5 minutes more to get to North Greenwich.
Same to Canary Wharf - I started extrapolating - 5 minutes per station, only 22 in total - I'd be there by 7.30 latest.............wrong.........
At Canary Wharf, every fcuker and their brother and sister got on, the train was mobbed!
The theory now was - we were past the stuck train - plain sailing.......yes?
Noooooooooo............................
We moved off into the tunnel and went about a mile when we stopped again - we sat for 15 minutes going nowhere, then all the lights went off and the emergency lights came on - we could hear an alarm going off -
The driver told us there was a technical problem in the first carriage and engineers were trying to fix it - then the entire world went black - the emergency lights and air con, plus all the lights in the tunnel went off - you could hear a pin drop.........
15 minutes later the lights came back on and the driver said we would shortly, be limping into Canada Water, the problem was intermittent power failure - the real problem was one lying cvnt.................
Then all the lights went off again......
We eventually reached Canada Water at 7.00pm, where they advised us to leave the train and told us to p!ss-off and get a bus, at last some honesty!
Trouble was, there were 500 people queuing to get on the bus going in the right direction - it was at this stage, I decide to go home.
There were only 300 queuing to go the other way, which was to head to the deep south, to Lewisham, where you could pick up the Docklands Light Railway, back from where you came, to the Bank.
So I went for it, walked through to Monument, where I met the fit arse again, then to Tower Hill, round to Fenchurch Street and back to the suburbs - I arrived back at where I started after three and a half hours, travelling in a complete circle to nowhere!
When I got to my local pub, it was half-time.
In conclusion, I only have one thing to say, God help us all, if we win the Olympic bid........
Wot???????????????????????????